The Complete Men Podcast

Paul Tonner

Aim of the podcast is to help, support and inspire men of all ages to reach their full potential and be fully present in their lives. To also be a better man in serving their family and community and listen to the amazing and inspiring stories of men and talk about the benefits of joining a men's group. read less

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Having A Positive Mindset and the Story of Nathan Charles

Having A Positive Mindset and the Story of Nathan Charles

In this episode, Paul will talk about the importance of having a positive mindset and being optimistic about life, approaching it from a positive point of view. He will also talk about the energy one has and what they can give out to the world around them through their mindset, their actions and their words.Paul will talk about how for many years he struggled greatly and let himself down through his negative mindset and how it greatly affected himself and those close to him, eg, leading to divorce. He will also talk about how attending Complete Men on a regular basis has helped him greatly in filtering out and being aware of his negative thoughts and the positive environment provided at a Complete Mens group.He will also discuss some of the following- how having a positive mindset means making positive thinking a habit and continually looking for the positives in every situation good or bad.- the importance of focussing on your self-talk and how we can be our worst critics and catastrophise situations.- characteristics/traits associated with having a positive mindset eg, acceptance, optimism, resilience.- health benefits of positive thinking eg, increasing one's lifespan, improved physical and psychological well-being, lower rates of distress and pain.Paul will also share the inspirational story of Nathan Charles, a former professional Rugby Union player who defied science and has overcome challenges in his life to become the only professional athlete to play a contact sport with Cystic Fibrosis. Paul will talk about Cystic Fibrosis and the great work Nathan Charles does as an ambassador for Cystic Fibrosis Australia raising awareness of the condition. Nathan Charles story is one that exemplifies the power of having a positive mindset and is a story of true determination, grit, courage and a never give up attitude.May 26 each year is 'Sixty Five Roses day', which is the National Day of Awareness for Cystic Fibrosis and people can purchase a bouquet, sell roses in the community or send virtual roses throughout the month to raise money. This money goes towards helping provide vital support services to people with CF and fund critical research.Paul will also provide some tips on identifying negative thinking and focussing on positive thinking which includes1. Focussing on good things in one's life.2. Practicing Gratitude and starting everyday on a positive note eg, uplifting music, going for a walk.3. Opening yourself up to humour4. Spending time with positive people5. Practicing positive self-talk6. Identifying areas of negativity.Sources1.Mayoclinic.org ‘healthy lifestyles, stress management. Positive thinking. Stop negative talk to reduce stress.’ By mayo clinic staff. 3/2/2022.2.Positive psychology.com ‘positive mindset: how to develop a positive mental attitude,’ by Courtney e. Ackerman M.A. 5/7/2018.3.Song by Monty python “always look on the bright side of life”, source lyric find, written by eric idle.4. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nathan_Charles5.. Australia’s toughest sportspeople ‘Nathan Charles, rugby union’, by mick Collis,affirm press, 2021.7.https://www.cff.org/intro-cf/about-cystic-fibrosis8. https://www.nathancharles.com.au/my-story9. Sydney university football club ‘Nathan Charles appointed new executive generalmanager,’ by sufc, 25/11/2022.10 Australian Men’s health ‘how wallaby Nathan Charles tackled cystic fibrosis torepresent Australia,’ by men’s health staff 1/5/21.11. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Verity_Charles12. https://www.cfwa.org.au/65roses2023/13.Healthline.com ‘benefits of thinking positively and how to do it.’ By Adrienne Santos Longhurst, medically reviewed by timothy j. legge PhDPsyD. 21/2/2019.Intro Music- Thrive by All Good Folks from album Music VineOutro Music- Revelations by Richard Smithson album Uppbeat

Episodes

Having A Positive Mindset and the Story of Nathan Charles

Having A Positive Mindset and the Story of Nathan Charles

In this episode, Paul will talk about the importance of having a positive mindset and being optimistic about life, approaching it from a positive point of view. He will also talk about the energy one has and what they can give out to the world around them through their mindset, their actions and their words.Paul will talk about how for many years he struggled greatly and let himself down through his negative mindset and how it greatly affected himself and those close to him, eg, leading to divorce. He will also talk about how attending Complete Men on a regular basis has helped him greatly in filtering out and being aware of his negative thoughts and the positive environment provided at a Complete Mens group.He will also discuss some of the following- how having a positive mindset means making positive thinking a habit and continually looking for the positives in every situation good or bad.- the importance of focussing on your self-talk and how we can be our worst critics and catastrophise situations.- characteristics/traits associated with having a positive mindset eg, acceptance, optimism, resilience.- health benefits of positive thinking eg, increasing one's lifespan, improved physical and psychological well-being, lower rates of distress and pain.Paul will also share the inspirational story of Nathan Charles, a former professional Rugby Union player who defied science and has overcome challenges in his life to become the only professional athlete to play a contact sport with Cystic Fibrosis. Paul will talk about Cystic Fibrosis and the great work Nathan Charles does as an ambassador for Cystic Fibrosis Australia raising awareness of the condition. Nathan Charles story is one that exemplifies the power of having a positive mindset and is a story of true determination, grit, courage and a never give up attitude.May 26 each year is 'Sixty Five Roses day', which is the National Day of Awareness for Cystic Fibrosis and people can purchase a bouquet, sell roses in the community or send virtual roses throughout the month to raise money. This money goes towards helping provide vital support services to people with CF and fund critical research.Paul will also provide some tips on identifying negative thinking and focussing on positive thinking which includes1. Focussing on good things in one's life.2. Practicing Gratitude and starting everyday on a positive note eg, uplifting music, going for a walk.3. Opening yourself up to humour4. Spending time with positive people5. Practicing positive self-talk6. Identifying areas of negativity.Sources1.Mayoclinic.org ‘healthy lifestyles, stress management. Positive thinking. Stop negative talk to reduce stress.’ By mayo clinic staff. 3/2/2022.2.Positive psychology.com ‘positive mindset: how to develop a positive mental attitude,’ by Courtney e. Ackerman M.A. 5/7/2018.3.Song by Monty python “always look on the bright side of life”, source lyric find, written by eric idle.4. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nathan_Charles5.. Australia’s toughest sportspeople ‘Nathan Charles, rugby union’, by mick Collis,affirm press, 2021.7.https://www.cff.org/intro-cf/about-cystic-fibrosis8. https://www.nathancharles.com.au/my-story9. Sydney university football club ‘Nathan Charles appointed new executive generalmanager,’ by sufc, 25/11/2022.10 Australian Men’s health ‘how wallaby Nathan Charles tackled cystic fibrosis torepresent Australia,’ by men’s health staff 1/5/21.11. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Verity_Charles12. https://www.cfwa.org.au/65roses2023/13.Healthline.com ‘benefits of thinking positively and how to do it.’ By Adrienne Santos Longhurst, medically reviewed by timothy j. legge PhDPsyD. 21/2/2019.Intro Music- Thrive by All Good Folks from album Music VineOutro Music- Revelations by Richard Smithson album Uppbeat

Dealing With Trauma and the Remarkable Story of Tony Dell.

Dealing With Trauma and the Remarkable Story of Tony Dell.

In this episode Paul will talk about what trauma is and how it affects people in different ways and what some of the causes of trauma are. Paul will also discuss- emotional and psychological trauma and how it is caused by one-time events and ongoing, relentless stress.- times when Paul has experienced some trauma and what helped him dealing with trauma.- emotional and physical symptoms of trauma- how one who suffers trauma can receive help and live a productive life- the remarkable story of Tony Dell, a former Australian Cricketer who served in the army in the Vietnam War and his many years of living with undiagnosed Post Traumatic Stress Disorder from his time on the battlefield. He is now playing a tremendous role in raising awareness of PTSD in the community.Paul will also discuss some Types of Treatment available for Trauma.1. Cognitive Behavioural Therapy2. Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing or EMDR3. Somatic Therapies eg, acupoint stimulation, Reiki, sensorimotor psychotherapy.4. Medications to help with anxiety, sleep, depression.5. Self care eg, exercise, healthy diet, avoiding alcohol and drugs.6. Mindfullness7. Connecting with others and seeking support eg, support groups such as Complete Men.Sources1.https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tony_Dell2.https://www.espncricinfo.com/cricketers/tony-dell-49373.Podcast ‘once upon a time in the ashes, episode 9, tony dell’, 4/6/20214.One voice ‘tony dell lived experience 2021’, n.d.5.Skysports.com ‘tony dell’s journey from ashes debutant to ptsd victim of vietnam war exported in new book’, by greg milam, 24/6/2021.6.Twice shot ‘stand tall’, by tony dell founder of standtall4pts.org 17/10/2017.7.The footyalmanac. Write from the heart. ‘Almanac life: tony dell-soldier in a baggy green finds peace at last’, by ron reed, 29/6/2021..8. Help.Org.au 'emotional and psycological trauma', by Lawrence Robinson, Melinda Smith M.A and Jeanne Segal Ph.D 6/6/23.9. American Psychological Association 'Trauma', August 2022.10. Four Corners.com.au '5 Australian Immigration Success Stories', n.dIntro music- Thrive by All Good Folks from album Music VineOutro music- Revelations by Richard Smithson.

In this episode Paul talks about the topic of happiness and how happiness is a choice and that it is far more important to focus on internal happiness rather than the external eg, money, love. Paul will also talk about the happiness he acquires by attending Complete Men's groups on a regular basis, especially through the connection he receives and the support. Some other information to do with happiness includes.- how happiness is being present and accepting things the way they are.- how wanting and desiring things all the time will take one away from being happy.- the importance connection between gratitude and mindfulness in regard to happiness.- how social and cultural factors influence how one thinks about happiness and that genetics and life experiences play a role.- why happiness is important e.g., improves one's health, stronger friendships, more productive at work, coping better with stress.Paul will also provide some useful tips on how to build happiness in one's life such as1. building relationships and social connections2. practicing appreciation and mindfulness regularly3. practicing kindness, helping out others.4. choosing a healthy lifestyle e.g., physical activity, adequate sleep, eating a healthy, balanced diet.5. managing stress levels6. using humor and doing things one enjoys and also what they are good at.7. listening to uplifting, happy music e.g., create a happy playlist.8. Communicating with others when feeling unhappy and attending support groups such as men's groups.Sources1. Greatergood magazine. Berkeley university of California ‘happiness’, 20232. https://thiswayup.org.au/what-is-happiness-and-why-is-it-important/3. https://www.nhsinform.scot/healthy-living/mental-wellbeing/low-mood-and-depression/how-to-feel-happier4. The mindset mentor podcast “happiness-peace of mind”, by Rob Dial. 5. Thecreativesjournal.com ‘Karen Lethlean’, n.d.Intro music- Thrive by All Good Folks from album Music VineOutro Music- Revelations by Richardd Smithson from Uppbeat.

Visualizing What You Want

Visualizing What You Want

In this episode Paul talks about a powerful visualization process he took part in at Complete Men recently and the many benefits of visualization eg, becoming a better man, self love. Paul will also discuss- What is Visualization?- examples of some well-known sportspeople from over the years who have used visualization to help them excel in their sport eg, Arthur Ashe, Matthew Hayden, Kaite Ledecky.- that visualization can help one in everyday life such as helping one in reaching their financial goals, helping one in their occupation and in relationships, job interviews and public speaking.Paul will also provide some useful tips to consider on how to practice visualization such as 1. imagining the specific situation and using all of the senses eg, sight, smell, hearing.2. deciding on what technique suits eg, meditation.3. being clear and realistic with goals4. writing daily affirmations and using "I", language.5. creating a vision board and filling it with pictures of what you want your life to be like.6. setting your GPS ie, Goal, Path, Screen (imaging what it looks like on a screen and how it would feel).Sources1.Forbes.com ‘the power of visualisation and how to use it,” by Lidija globokar, 5/3/2020.2.. restoic.com ‘what is visualization? How successful athletes use this proven technique?’ by team restoic, 19/11/2020.3.Espn.cricinfo.com, couch talk ‘I was much an ironman as I was a cricketer,’ interview by Subash Jayaraman with Matthew Hayden, 27/2/2016.4.The mindset mentor podcast by rob dial ‘visualize and attract what I want,’ 4/7/2022.5.https://www.legends.report/arthur-ashe-more-than-a-wimbledon-champion/6.Mindtools.com ‘visualisation’, by the mindtools content team, n.d.Intro music- Thrive by All Good Folks from Album Music VineOutro music- Revelations by Richard Smithson from Uppbeat.-

Self-Confidence

Self-Confidence

In this episode, Paul talks about what it means to be a self-confident person and how one needs to learn how to build confidence and that it is an ongoing project. Paul will also talk about times in his life when his confidence was high and when it was low and how attending a men's group such as Complete Men has greatly improved his self-confidence and be more vulnerable. Paul will also discuss- the difference between a confident and a non-confident person.- factors that influence one's confidence- how our personal choices impact one's confidence and how doubt blocks one from reaching their potential in life.- the danger in having a comparison mindset and the importance of having a growth mindset not a fixed mindset.- the importance of embracing our past experiences and acknowledging the skills we have acquired.Paul will also discuss some tips on how to develop self-confidence such as1. Trying a quick fix e.g., picturing yourself having success.2. Having the belief in your ability to improve.3. practicing failure.4. making a list of your achievements and things you are proud of in your life and acknowledging your personal strengths and talent and reminding yourself of them.5. allowing time for your hobbies and trying out new things eg, podcasting.6. Practicing positive self-talk7. considering talking to a counsellor or mental health professional if struggling to develop self-confidence to help learn strategies.8. healthy diet, exercise and sleep.Sources1.TED-Ed ‘3 tips to boost our confidence’, by Susan Zimmerman 7/10/2015.2. On Purpose with Jay Shetty Podcast ‘5 mindsets necessary to build self-confidence and 4 ways to know you're enough’.4/8/2023.3. Reachout.com ‘how to build self-confidence’, https://au.reachout.com/articles/how-to-build-self-confidence4. University of south Florida, counselling centre ‘what is self-confidence?’ https://www.usf.edu/student-affairs/counseling-center/top-concerns/what-is-self-confidence.aspx5. The mindset mentor podcast with rob dial ‘master your decisions. The psychology of taking action,’ by rob dial 7/8/2023.6. verywellmind.com ‘how to be more confident: 9 tips that work’, by amy morin 13/2/2023.7. www.xcode.life ‘is self-esteem genetic? What studies say’, 22/8/2022.

Self Discipline

Self Discipline

In this episode Paul will talk about what it means to have self-discipline, why it is important in our lives and how one can develop self-discipline and lead a happier and more productive life.Paul will also talk about times when he has displayed self-discipline in his life and times when he has let himself down by not doing so.Other areas that will be discussed include.- the difference between self-discipline and motivation.- how self-discipline reduces anxiety, increases one's ability to reach their goals, increases happiness and builds resilience.- how one can develop self-discipline through focusing on the change of identy they want to happen and targeting the fundamentals in life eg, sleep, nutrition and exercise.- writing out goals and creating reminders and getting others to hold you accountable.- prioritizing and knowing your weaknesses- changing your perspective and embracing and leaning into discomfort.References1.entrepreneurship, health, how to fix the world, how to human, ‘screw motivation, what you need is discipline’, by Zbyhnev N.d.2. Betterup.com, ‘developing the discipline of self-discipline’, by maggie wooll, 24/2/22.3. ‘How to be more disciplined. Six ways to master self-control,’ by Thomas frank. 4/11/2018.4. Betterup.com ‘how (and why) to cultivate a positive mental attitude’, by Erin Eatough Ph.D. 8/11/2021.5. strides: Goal tracker. Habit checklist and reminders. Kyle Richey CEO Srides.app.com.Intro Music-Thrive By All Good Folks from Album Music VineOutro Music- Revelations by Richard Smithson from Uppbeat

In this episode Paul will talk about the many benefits of gratefulness and the importance of practicing it on a daily basis. Paul will talk about how gratitude is an important part of Complete Men in helping change the mindset, putting their struggles aside and focusing on what the men are grateful for in their lives and why they are grateful. Some of the many benefits of gratitude that will be discussed include.- acknowledging the goodness in life and that life is wonderful- changes one's perspective of the world- appreciating what we have not what we don't have- builds and maintains relationships with others- benefits one's social, emotional and psychological well-beingPaul will talk about how he incorporates gratitude into his daily life and will give some examples of others and how they have shown gratitude and find peace in their life despite hardships eg, Nelson Mandella, Edith Rubin, people from poor backgrounds.Paul will also discuss the Iceberg of Gratitude model and how below the surface one finds the simple, everyday pleasures eg, a smile, sunny day and how by consciously expressing one's gratitude for them it can improve's one's gratitude above the surface level and benefit other parts of their life.Thanksgiving will also be discussed and why it is practiced in many countries around the world. Paul will also provide some tips on how to more grateful such as - showing your appreciation to others- using a gratitude journal- writing a gratitude letter and even a gratitude visit- meditation- gratitude videos, podcasts and apps.References1.Positive psychology.com ‘what is gratitude and why it is so important? ‘By tiffany sauber-millacci PhD. 28/2/2017.2.The mindset mentor podcast ‘how to have more gratitude’, by rob dial. 12/7/23.3.Www. wbur.org ‘holocaust survivor shares the rare moments of kindness amid unimaginable cruelty’ by Yasmin Amer, 27/1/2020.4.blankpagesandemptyspaces.com/interviews/hugh-van-cuylenburg-from-the-resilience-project/. n.dIntro music- Thrive by All Good Folks from album Music VineOutro music- Revelations by Richard Smithson from Uppbeat

Being Triggered

Being Triggered

In this episode Paul will talk about what being triggered by something or someone is really about and how one can learn greatly from being triggered. Paul will also talk about different examples of what makes one triggered and how they are often due to past, unresolved trauma and can be when one perceives a threat to their environment. Paul will give examples of when he has been triggered and how he now has the opinion that being triggered is a gift and makes him aware of what he is holding onto from the past. He will also discuss - internal triggers (comes from within the person eg, an emotion, loneliness) and external triggers (which comes from the person's environment eg, certain sounds, images)- how triggers are formed eg, a strong sensory connection, a deeply ingrained habit.- the importance of identifying where a trigger comes from and then see the cause and effect of what it is linked to eg, person experiencing grief around a certain time of the year.- tips on how to recognize what triggers you e.g., paying attention to the symptoms and how you are feeling.- tips on how to respond and deal with what triggers you e.g., memorize your reaction, taking a break, understanding your feelings and working with a mental health professional or counsellor.References1.Verywellmind.com ‘what does it mean to be triggered,’ by Arlin cuncic MD 10/3/2022.2.Betterup.com ‘triggered: learn how to recognise the feeling and keep it in check’ by allaya cooks-Cameron, 15/7/2022.3.Betterup.com ‘breathwork. The secret to emotional regulation.’ By allaya cooks-Campbell, 19/8/2021.4.The mindset mentor podcast ‘why do you get triggered?’30/12/2020.5.Verywellmind.com ‘what is mindfulness meditation? By Kendra cherry M.Ed. 22/9/2022.Intro Music- Thrive by All Good Folks from Album Music VineOutro Music- Revelations by Richard Smithson from album Uppbeat.

Learning From One's Mistakes (There is a hole in my Sidewalk").

Learning From One's Mistakes (There is a hole in my Sidewalk").

In this episode Paul will begin by reading a poem "There is a hole in the sidewalk", and the meaning he gets from this poem and from when it has been discussed in past Complete Men sessions. One can make the same choices in life that only lead to mistakes and into the same "hole in the sidewalk", which often can be very difficult to get out of. eg, addictions, alcoholism, drugs, negative relationships and negative thought patterns and not managing one's anger. It is important for one to look back on the mistakes they have made in their life, not beat themselves up for them or blame others. One can only get out of the hole in the sidewalk by learning from their mistakes, becoming wiser and developing their personal and organizational skills. in this episode some of what Paul will discuss are- where he made significant mistakes in his life, how he took life for granted, how it negatively impacted those close to him and how by self-reflection and attending men's groups it helped him learn from the mistakes and not be so hard on himself.- how others have inspired him by being open and talking about past mistakes they have made in life and how they have wiser and stronger.- tips to help deal with mistakes one makes and how to stop repeating them in the future. These include owning your mistake, reframing the error, analyzing the mistake, putting lessons learned into practice and reviewing your progress.Mistakes as Billy Joel's song "Your only human", are a normal part of life. They are great opportunities to learn and become better individuals.References1.Lifelessons4u.wordpress.com “how life works. There is a hole in my sidewalk. “By Portia Nelson 30/9/2009. How to live life. Life’s lessons by Dct Randy Pausch.2.There’s a hole in my sidewalk by Portia Nelson. Complete men, the states of change.3.9NOW a current affair ‘how a former bikie is trying to change broken youth crime system’, by Sacha passi, 2021.4.Mindtools.com ‘how to learn from your mistakes,’ by the mind tools content team.5.https://www.niagarainstitute.com, ‘I keep making mistakes at work. What to do to break the pattern,’ by Emily may, 10/6/2021.6.Genius.com, ‘you’re only human, (second wind), by Billy Joel, produced by Phil Ramone, 1/7/1985Intro music- Thrive by All Good Folks from Album Music VineInterim- Sky High by Trinity from Uppbeat.Outro music- Revelations by Richard Smithson from album Uppbeat.

In this episode will discuss the topic of resentment and that it is a response to wrongdoing and how many men particularly struggle with resentment with regard to ex-wife's, ex-girlfriends, parents, the government. Resentment often results when one's feelings become too overwhelming and is often associated with feelings such as anger, disappointment, bitterness. some of what Paul will discuss include.- how it is solely up to the individual to make the choice to let go, forgive in order to let go of resentment and live a more fulfilling and prosperous life.- examples of resentment in his own life and how resentment is often due to an unfortunate event taking place.- signs of resentment such as inability to stop thinking about the event, recurring negative thoughts, feelings of regret/remorse, avoiding particular situations, inability to let go of anger, feelings of inadequacy.Paul will also provide some tips to consider helping one's resentment and live a happier life. These include.- seeing a medical specialist e.g., psychologist, psychiatrist.- considering why it's difficult to forgive- using self-compassion- empathy for the other person and thinking loving thoughts for the person or situation one resents- practicing gratitude- checking motives and expectations- focusing on what one values in lifeReferences1.JSTOR ‘on the relationship between forgiveness and resentment in the sermons of joseph butler’, by Shelby Weitzel, history of philosophy quarterly, vol 24.no 3, July 2007, pp 237-253.2.WebMD ‘what is resentment? ‘Jennifer Casarella, MD, 29/12/2022.3.Tinybudda.com ‘4 powerful tips to reduce resentment and feel happier’.by Jared Akers, Nd.4.The Savvy Psychologist podcast ‘How to let go of resentment”. By Doctor Monica Johnson 5/12/2020.Intro music- Thrive by All Good Folks from Album Music VineOutro music- Revelations by Richard Smithson from Uppbeat.

Changing Unhealthy Habits

Changing Unhealthy Habits

In this episode, Paul will talk about some common unhealthy habits many people struggle with and will give some examples of unhealthy habits he has dealt with over the years and today. Paul will discuss the 'Law of 100', and he finds it helps him in changing an unhealthy habit into a positive one. Some common unhealthy habits people have include- too much time on social media- distraction when driving- being too hard on oneself- multitasking- stress eating- smoking and excessive drinking of alcohol- nail biting- numbing through pornography- overspendingPaul will mention some other tips to consider when giving up unhealthy habits and living a more productive life. This include- increasing and decreasing certain cue's in one's environment- making it harder to follow through with unhealthy habits and easier to follow through with productive ones.- preparing items the night before- making a list- identifying the cause of the bad habit- replacing the bad habit with an alternative behaviour- not being too hard on oneself- rewarding oneself.ReferencesIntro music- Thrive by All Good Folks from album Music VineOutro music- Revelations by Richard Smithson from UppbeatThe mindset mentor ‘the law of 100’ by rob dial, 11/11/2022.Lifehack.org ‘25 bad habits you need to quit right now’. By celestine Chua. 25/10/2022.Improvement pill. ‘How to change your habits-the easiest way’ 28/2/2019.Psych central ‘ways to change a habit,’ by Joslyn Jelinek 29/7/2021.

Embracing Change and Taking On New Opportunities

Embracing Change and Taking On New Opportunities

In this episode Paul will share the story of a courageous and inspirational man. John Maclean began life tough in the outer western suburbs of Sydney. He always dreamed of being a paid professional athlete and when he achieved that dream at a young age life was going great. However, one day in 1988 he was hit from behind by a eight tonne truck and all of a sudden he was fighting for his life. Thankfully John survived and was left an incomplete paraplegic with his dreams and aspirations shattered.John embraced this massive change to his life and took on exciting challenges and opportunities. He never gave up and he went on to achieve extrordinary athletic feats such as- becoming the first paraplegic to finish the Ironman World Championships in Hawaii.- first paraplegic to swim the English Channel- competed at the Olympic and Paralympics winning medals in athletics and rowing.- completing the Nepean Triathlon without the use of a wheelchair after regaining some use of his legs through Ware K Tremor therapy. He is the founder of the John Maclean Foundation, which assists wheelchair users under the age of 18. and is a much sought after motivational speaker with his clients including eBay and Pfizer.In order to accept change, John Maclean focusses and promotes the five M's.Map- having a map or planMindset- having the right mindsetMentor- Accessing and experienced mentorMotivation- Accessing one's motivation to changeMomentum- by accessing one's progress over time.ReferencesThe Mindset Reset podcast 'Finding Opportunities in Obstacles', by Rob Dial 7/5/2023.https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_Maclean_(sportsperson)Flint rehab ‘incomplete paraplegia: frequently asked questions’ by courtney maher, 5/1/2021.John mclean ‘how far can you go?” https://johnmaclean.com.au/Change a constant challenge, john maclean, TEDxDesignTechHS, 26/6/2021.https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ultraman_(endurance_challenge)https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kathryn_Ross_(rower)Research gate. ‘Introducing a Novel (very effective) Therapy for Programming and Reprogramming the Central Nervous System; “Ware K Tremor” Therapy– A Health Trigger Processhttps://jmf.com.au/about-us/ ‘john maclean foundation’Standing eight podcast “Featuring the inspirational John Maclean”, 2/8/2020.

In this episode Paul will talk about a useful process the men did in regard to the topic of depression and Paul will open up and talk about his own experience with depression and anxiety disorder and how he has put the tools in place to help him with dealing with episodes of depression and social anxiety over the years. In this episode some of what is also discussed includes- Social anxiety and appropriate treatment.- some statistics in regard to mental illness e.g., 44 percent of Australians between the ages of 16-85 are estimated to experience a mental disorder at some time in their lives and one in five in the past 12 months.- why men are less likely to seek help for depression e.g., told to "man up".- assistance available for men who are depressed e.g., men's groups such as Complete Men, Mensline- What is depression? e.g., sadness, lack of focus, insomnia, loss of hope.- What doesn't work for one who is depressed? e.g., numbing, distraction, isolating, not seeking help.- What works to help one who is depressed- e.g., seeking professional help such as a psychiatrist/psychologist, medication, reaching out to others, exercise, helplines such as Lifeline, asking "What can I do and how can I do it?"- How one can support themselves when they are depressed e.g., meditation, mindfulness, breathwork, support groups, staying connected, caring for a pet, balanced schedule, gratitude, sunlight, changing negative thoughts into positive ones, healthy nutrition and taking B complex supplements.- how to support another person who is depressed e.g., not judging, being persistent, tolerance and acceptance, empathy.References—-----------------------------------------------------------Brisbane pediatric nutrition, ‘depression: when it’s all in the family’, written by Katherine kam, https://www.webmd.com/depression/features/depression-when-its-all-in-the-family 23/2/2009.Better health channel. ‘Social phobia’, https://www.betterhealth.vic.gov.au/health/conditionsandtreatments/social-phobiaAustralian government, Australian institute of health and welfare ‘mental health, prevalence, and impact of mental illness,’ 29/3/23.https://988lifeline.org/help-someone-else/?utm B4xMnuRTCse6V9_evAe2ATr1vB5EsOOtZ7Ed64xoCH4AQAvD_BwEhttps://www.beyondblue.org.au/Helpguide.org ‘coping with depression.’ By Melinda smith, Lawrence Robinson, and Jeanne Segal Ph.D. 4/4/2023.Introduction music- Thrive by All Good Folks from Album Music VineOutro music- Revelations by Richard Smithson from Uppbeat.

How to Have More Energy

How to Have More Energy

In this episode will talk about how to install more energy into ones life and how having more energy results in more action and leads to a more fulfilling and productive life. Paul will discuss what methods he has used in order to deal with a chronic health condition and have more energy and how it has worked for him e.g., aromatherapy, exercise, good nutrition and improved quality of sleep. Some of what he will discuss in the episode includes.- the negative effects of having low energy e.g., affecting work performance, relationships, ability to focus.- the Root Cause Protocol and how it helps with improving energy and dealing with inflammation in the body.l- prioritising quality sleep eg, having a consistent sleep schedule and bed routine, limit exposure to screens at night.- exercising regularly- eating a balanced diet and avoiding sugar and processed foods, - keeping a balance in blood sugar levels throughout the day. and eating foods with a low glycemic index.- increase magnesium intake- staying well hydrated by drinking the right amount of water everyday.- managing stress through practicing deep breathing, meditation, mindfulness and exercise.- limiting caffeine intake especially in the afternoon and at nighttime.- limiting alcohol consumption, especially before bedtime and in the middle of the day.- listening to energising music especially with tasks one may find difficult to get motivated to do and listening to personal develeopment podcasts.- giving up smoking - see a doctor to get a thyroid function and red blood cell count- getting more sun.References1. https://www.youngliving.com/en_AU/products/c/starting-options2. https://www.myaliveness.com/3. https://therootcauseprotocol.com/4. Webmd.com ‘10 ways to boost your energy’, by Colette Bouchez, 6/4/22.5. Complete guide to sleep care. Best practices for a restful and happier you. By Kiki Ely. Quarto publishing, New York, 2022.6. How to have more energy. 7 best ways. Solver. 8/5/23.7. Harvard health publishing. Harvard medical school. ‘9 tips to boost your energy naturally’, 30/8/2020.8. https://yerbamateaustralia.com.au/Intro music- ‘Thrive’ by All Good Folks from Album Music VineOutro music- ‘Revelations’ by Richard Smithson Album Upbeat

In this episode Paul will discuss the topic of Forgiveness and how if one doesn't forgive they will tend to carry feelings of anger, bitterness inside them and find it difficult to move on and live a more productive, peaceful life. Some of what Paul will discuss include- where he has moments in his life where he has been confronted with having to forgive and when he hasn't and held grudges it would affect his relationships with others and affected his ability to enjoy the present.- how one has many "hearts of the matter", moments in their lives where they are confronted with deciding whether to forgive or not. eg, a lost love, broken friendship.- by choosing to forgive it improve one's physical, emotional and spiritual well-being.- how forgiveness involves time, patience and grace.- why people choose not to forgive eg, it feels unfair and feels good.- how some people are naturally more forgiving than others- by not choosing to forgive and being wrapped up in the wrong it can disconnect one from others eg, family and friends, and can make one depressed, irritable and anxious.- how forgiving and forgetting is possible when one is able to see more than one angle of the situation and can see the bigger picture and develop wisdom.- by forgiving it shows maturity, provides a powerful legacy for others to follow, grants one more freedome and one becomes a survivor not a victim. One is in more control of the life.- one can learn to forgive themselves by accessing their wrongdoing, being kind to themselves and consider reaching out to those they perceive they have harmed.Paul will also provide some useful tips on how to learn to forgive and let go. These include1. beginning with an intention to forgive.2. acknowledging the pain caused by the grievance.3. evaluating the gains and losses.4. assessing the attitudes and beliefs around forgiveness.5 using letting go exercises eg, journaling, meditation and visualization, daily affirmations and monitoring inner thoughts and one's own speech.ReferencesIntro music- ‘Thrive’ by All Good Folks from Album Music VineOutro music- ‘Revelations’ by Richard Smithson Album UpbeatMayoclinic.org “forgiveness: letting go of grudges and bitterness”. By mayo clinic staff n.d.The heart of the matter by don Henley, album ‘the end of the innocence’, released 1989. Songfacts.com, 26/7/2014.Don Henley lyrics “the heart of the matter”, azylyrics.com, 30/7/2014.Powering through ‘is forgiving and forgetting really possible?’ the complete men foundation, Nd.Letting go of past grievances by Judith Perlman, LCSW, highland park, Illinois.

A Complete Men Night and the Importance of the Protocols

A Complete Men Night and the Importance of the Protocols

In this episode, Paul will talk about what is involved in a typical night at Complete Men, the structure of the session and the importance of the group protocols which are read out and adhered to at each session. The aim is to make it more comfortable for any man that is thinking about attending Complete Men. In this episode, Paul will discuss- the importance of men's groups and how they are growing in western society.- the benefits men receive when they attend a men's group and what they take away and transform into their everyday lives.- the reasons why men attend a men's group such as Complete Men eg, relationship issues, seperation, divorce, anxiety and depression, mid-life crisis.- the many benefits Paul has obtained from attending men's groups over the past 10 years and why he attends on a regular basis eg, being accountable, be a better man.In talking about the structure of the session, Paul will talk about the following- Meet and greet and introduction- The importance of sitting in a circle.- Why men come to a men's group- short process eg, breathwork, meditation, a poem/story with a powerful meaning.In regards to the 9 Group Protocols, Paul will discuss and talk more in depth about1. "I" language and only speaking for oneself and the power of using "I" language.2. Confidentiality3. Safety and Respect4. The talking stick5. Feedback and advice6. Feelings7. Passing- and how it is ok for a man to pass.8. Presence9. FacilitationPaul will then discuss in depth the - Check in which is where men talk to the group about their week, what's happening in their life and getting to the emotional content of their experience. Men talk about what is on their mind, issues, challenges, feelings.- opportunity for clarification and feedback.- short break to connect with other men in the group- process which involves focusing on a particular topic and engaging in great discussion where men can explore themselves further. Men are also provided with the opportunity to go into a smaller group for a longer share. - short check out ie, what men are taking away from the meeting and what they will take into their week.- general information eg, upcoming seminars, programs, social events.-Buddy system where new men are matched with an experienced man in the group who checks in on them throughout the week.Referenceshttps://dealingwithdifficultpeople.org/i-language-2/https://completemen.org.au/about-usIntro music-Thrive by All Good Folks from Album Music VineOutro music- Revelations by Richard Smithson, Album 'Upbeat'. References for Anger episode1.American psychological association “anger”, 20232. Mainstream corporate training “the anger process and how it affects our thinking”. 2023.3. YLC Your life counts “dealing with anger. Types of anger”, n.d.4. Dr Gabor Mate on “How to process anger and rage”, the Tim Ferris show 2022.Intro music-Thrive by All Good Folks from Album Music VineOutro music- Revelations by Richard Smithson, Album 'Upbeat'.

In this episode, Paul will focus on the topic of anger and discuss what makes one angry and some of his own personal experiences with anger and how attending Complete Men on a regular basis has assisted him in learning to respond and not react. Paul will also talk about the following- what is anger?- how anger can be a good and a bad thing and if it isn't managed properly can lead to anger management issues.- our anger can affect our physical and mental health.- how it isn't the actual event that makes one angry, it is how they interpret the event.- the importance of asking the question "is my anger helping or hurting me?"- how anger occurs when our boundaries are crossed and how we want to protect our boundaries.- how anger can be supressed in the body for years from when we are young and how it can build up for years and be released later in life in an unhealth response when easily triggered.- healthy anger is anger taken out in a positive way eg, fully experiencing the process of rage and understanding what is happening in the body.- types of anger eg, passive aggression, open aggression, assertive aggression.Paul will also provide some useful tips on how to deal with anger positively such as1. deep breathing2. relaxing the muscles through progressive muscle relaxation3. developing problem solving through journaling.4. distraction e.g., going for a walk, listening to music.5. seeking context in regard to the situation.6. seeking professional help when required e.g., developing anger management issues.

Setting Boundaries

Setting Boundaries

In this episode, Paul will talk about the importance of setting healthy boundaries and how it defines our identity and all comes down to clear communication. The clearer one can communicate their boundaries, the more likely the persons' boundaries will be respected and it will serve to protect our physical, mental and emotional well-being. Paul will discuss examples of what boundaries he sets for himself and where he has let himself down in the past by not establishing and setting boundaries in place. Paul will also discuss some of the following- Batteries (people who give us energy and respect our boundaries) and vacuums (people who drain us of energy and have little respect for our boundaries).- by setting healthy boundaries we are less likely to become stressed and physically and emotinally fatigued.- setting boundaries is based around aspects such as as emotional energy, time, personal space, sexuality, morals and ethics, material possessions and finances.- the difference between rigid boundaries and loose/open boundaries and how we can have a mix of boundaries eg, rigid at work, loose/open at home.- characteristics of a person who sets healthy boundaries for themselves.- what to consider when setting boundaries for yourself eg, physical, sexual, intellectual, emotional, financial aspects.- how by not respecting another person's boundaries can create feelings of resentment and contempt and cause one to withdraw.Paul will also provide some tips on how to set healthy boundaries such as 1. reflecting on reasons for your boundaries2. starting with a few boundaries3. setting boundaries early on and being consistent.4. allowing time to do activities that you enjoy and caring for yourself5. setting healthy boundaries on social media6. communicating when your boundaries are crossed.7. recognising and respecting the boundaries of others.References1. https://www.scienceofpeople.com/how-to-set-boundaries/ by logan Hailey n.d2. The mindset mentor podcast “How to set boundaries.” By Rob Dial. 2022.3. Psychcentral.com, “10 ways to build and preserve better boundaries”, by Chantelle Pater more, medically reviewed by Jacquelyn Johnson PhD. 3/6/2021.4. How to set boundaries without feeling guilty (and why people drain your energy) by Aaron Doughty.2020.Intro music- Thrive by All Good Folks from album Music VineOutro music- Revelations by Richard Smithson, Upbeat.

Meditation- Interview With Glenn Moran.

Meditation- Interview With Glenn Moran.

In this episode Glenn Moran is back to discuss with Paul the many benefits of the practice of meditation. He will discuss what meditation is and provide some insight into the keys for success when meditating.Glenn will also talk about his personal journey with meditation and how it has greatly helped him with dealing with his physical disability and associated conditions on a daily basis.

Facing Your Fears

Facing Your Fears

In this episode, Paul would talk about how our fears can hold us back in life and stop us from chasing and going after our dreams and living the life we want to live. Paul will give a personal account of some of the major fears he has experienced in his life and what he has found helpful in dealing with these fears eg, OCD, public speaking. Paul will also discuss some of the following- what a fear is and how when one feels fear it means they are reaching the edge of their comfort zone.- how fear is brought on by a threat of danger, harm or pain and that most of what we fear does not kill us and does not cause us any real harm.- different types of fear eg, immediate, imagined and what is at the centre of fear eg, fear of failure.- how avoiding our fears really causes more anxiety.- examples of some famous people who never gave up and faced their fears.- how a phobia can develop when fears become ongoing and irrational. eg, social phobia. - how methods such as cognitive behavioral therapy are very helpful in dealing with fear and phobias.- some useful strategies/tips on dealing with fear such as making an action plan, practicing mindfulness, deep breathing and progressive muscle relaxation and finding humor.ReferencesFifteen highly successful people who failed before succeeding, success mindset, lifehack.org. By Sebastian kipmah. 26/9/2022.https://www.healthdirect.gov.au/facing-and-overcoming-fears, June 2022.https://psychcentral.com/health/how-to-face-your-fears. “6 healthy coping strategies to face your fears”.26/7/2022.The mindset mentor podcast, by rob dial. 2022. “How to get over fear of failure”.https://www.health.harvard.edu/mind-and-mood/mindfulness-can-help-you-tame-fears-and-worries 15/12/2022.