Dear Diary (& Listeners),

There is so much I want to say.

Today I reflect on the fact that this is the TENTH episode of The Dichotomy Diaries...

TEN?!

I was so scared to release the TRAILER you guys...

I remember recording it over and over again. On my IPHONE of all devices.

Something inside of me knew that this was exactly what I needed to heal, find purpose, and remember the feeling of self-love.

With Christmas right around the corner, I feel more emotional than usual.

I am so PROUD of myself.

I am so HUMBLED with the support I receive from you all.

I am SHOCKED at the amount of listener submissions I receive.

I am NOSTALGIC for the warmth of family tradition around the holiday season.

I am DISGUSTED at the attempts of Victim Shaming that happens in our society.

I am MOTIVATED to continue to lead by example for those who have been taken advantage of an abused.

I AM ALL THE THINGS.

And that's probably why I cried during this episode.

In Episode 10 - The House Always Wins, we uncover the truth behind the mysterious Arizona Woman who shared countless hours on the phone with Dick, and all the things associated. We finally move into our BELOVED apartment in the "best part" of town...And Christmas is spent with Dick's family. That holiday was filled with a lot of love. I remember feeling such warmth. However, there was this unshakable feeling that something was wrong...or maybe it was that there was something- that everyone around me knew, but I didn't.

This is my piece of advice for you. Especially after recording this episode...

Childhood Trauma, whatever that may be, is NO joke.

If you do not seek to heal or understand your childhood trauma, you WILL carry it into every relationship you have in the future- until you do.

Give your parents grace. They are doing this for the first time too.

And tell your family that you love them as often as you can.

While Christmas may seem like a happy time of year to most; to some, there is a dreaded anticipation around the approach of this holiday. To some, Christmas serves as a stark reminder that the people we love most, are no longer with us.

If you find yourself sad around the Christmas because of the absence of loved ones; I challenge you do at least one thing a day that is in celebration of those gone too soon.

Light a candle at church. Play their favorite song in the car. Cook their favorite meal.

The more we keep their memory alive, the more we embrace the feeling of happiness and feel freer to celebrate instead of mourn during Christmastime.

Buon Natale,

Amanda Arnier, MLS

If you have experienced anything similar and would like to be a guest on The Dichotomy Diaries, please email:

TheDichotomyDiaries@yahoo.com

Music: Ashley England

Sound Production: Amanda Arnier, MLS

Podcast Website: www.TheDichotomyDiaries.com

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