Start to Stop Toddler Breastfeeding

Jenna Wolfe, Certified Lactation Counselor (CBI) and Certified Purejoy Parent Coach

Start to Stop Toddler Breastfeeding by Jenna Wolfe is dedicated to supporting moms breastfeeding and weaning their older babies, toddlers and preschoolers, and those who are hoping to make it that far and want to set themselves up for success.

You wanted to breastfeed for years, not months, but I bet you didn’t expect gymnurstrics, skin crawling with every latch, nipple twiddling, meltdowns, and still having sleepless nights. In this podcast you will find everything you need to extended breastfeed, full-term wean and even tandem feed without losing your mind (or your toddler’s trust). We will also cover nutrition, supporting healthy emotional and social development in your child, and so much more.

You will find fireside chats with incredible experts like Krystyn Parks of Feeding Made Easy, Samantha Radford of Evidence-Based Mommy, and more. You will leave every episode feeling like you have found your people and have a new-found confidence in your breastfeeding and parenting.

If you are looking to make some changes in your breastfeeding relationship with your older baby or child, make sure to download the free “Making Changes” communication guide & cheat sheet so that you can say “no” to the feed while saying “yes” to the need.

www.ownyourparentingstory.com/guide

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Kids & FamilyKids & Family

Episodes

45: "Help!  I'm going on a work trip" 3 ways to prep dad & breastfed toddler for their first night alone together
Apr 22 2024
45: "Help! I'm going on a work trip" 3 ways to prep dad & breastfed toddler for their first night alone together
This week I'm answering a coaching call question from an extended breastfeeding mom:"My toddler often doesn't accept dad at night when she wakes up crying. I am and have always been the preferred parent.  I have just found out about a work trip I need to take which will have me away from my 2-year-old overnight for the first time.  Typically, I feed her to sleep and to resettle throughout the night.  If I am out of the house for bedtime, she does goes to sleep for other people, but it often takes a lot longer than if I am doing bedtime. Wondering if you had any tips that might help them both prepare for my work trip over the next few weeks and allow dad to be involved in general?"While there are a lot of things can be done to indirectly support a family in this situation, in this podcast episode, I break down a simple 3 part strategy to support a non-breastfeeding parent & a breastfed toddler for their first night(s) alone together. Whether you decide to night wean ahead of time or not (and I do explore this a little more in the episode), bolstering and leveraging your child's connection with the person who will be caring for them is key to a relaxing time apart. Find more opportunities for playful interactions between dad & kiddo (without pulling back from your own playful interactions with your child.)  Utilizing "bridging" tools to help your child feel connected with you even when you are apart and help that separation feel less scary and intense. Expand the non-breastfeeding caregiver's capacity to hold space for the feelings that may come up. Resources Mentioned: https://developingchild.harvard.edu/science/key-concepts/serve-and-return/Want to learn more from me? Watch my free, instant access workshop:  Designing Your Pathway to Toddler Breastfeeding Mastery Grab your free guide to say "No" to the feed while still saying "yes" to the need at  www.ownyourparentingstory.com/guideLove this episode?!  Shoot me a DM over on Instagram @own.your.parenting.story and tell me all about it.
44 - HELP!  My toddler is struggling to listen first thing in the morning (and a quick personal update!)
Apr 15 2024
44 - HELP! My toddler is struggling to listen first thing in the morning (and a quick personal update!)
**SUBMIT YOUR Q FOR ME TO ANSWER IN FUTURE EPISODES**In this week's episode of Start to Stop Toddler Breastfeeding, I'm answering a question I received from a student in Own Your Breastfeeding Story. "How can I encourage my 2 year old to settle down when he is on the bed with us? We cosleep and most of the time especially in the morning when he wakes up, after he nurses from me, he immediately goes to wake up our 4 month old, or will start making big movements that will wake her up. We try to explain to him that when the newborn is sleeping (or anyone) we whisper and we try not to disturb them.Is this an unrealistic expectation of a toddler?  What else can we do? "This kind of situation comes up in lots of different contexts - and for tandem breastfeeding moms, it can feel particularly loaded. Breastfeeding is your number one tool, but maybe your toddler isn't interested, or maybe YOU aren't interested.  Are you destined to have a horrible day that begins with a stressful morning?In the episode I share a few different things to consider, and give some practical support: 1 - Check in with YOUR expectations first.  2 - Set your little one up for success by talking about this issue outside of the moment. 3 - Support them to have something else to do.  4 - Playfully engage with them to put them into a receptive state and avoid having to tell them what to do/not to do altogether.  Want to learn more from me? Watch my free, instant access workshop:  Designing Your Pathway to Toddler Breastfeeding Mastery Grab your free guide to say "No" to the feed while still saying "yes" to the need at  www.ownyourparentingstory.com/guideLove this episode?!  Shoot me a DM over on Instagram @own.your.parenting.story and tell me all about it.
43: *UPDATED* Tandem breastfeeding: Life with 2 booby-monsters (part 3 of the tandem feeding series)*
Mar 12 2024
43: *UPDATED* Tandem breastfeeding: Life with 2 booby-monsters (part 3 of the tandem feeding series)*
**AUDIO FIXED**Breastfeeding a toddler and a newborn... at the same time -> most people in the Western world think this is crazy. And yet, I breastfed 2 kids (of different ages) for 3.5 years, and I hear from listeners all the time who are either doing it or considering it. But, just like most things "extended breastfeeding" there aren't many places to find support when you start out on your tandem nursing journey. In this final part of the Tandem Feeding series I give you all the things I wish I would have known as a first time tandem feeding mom, I cover: The most commonly asked tandemfeeding questionsPreparing to tandem feedNavigating the early days of tandem nursing (including positions & sleep) Common challengesSome benefits of tandem nursing. Resources & Links from the episode:Sleep:Tiffany's Safe Bedsharing GuideUniversity of Notre Dame Mother Baby Sleep Labratory FAQLa Leche League International Safe 7 SleepingBaby Wearing:Tula Toddler Carriers (not an affiliate - just an example of something available)Ring Sling with a newborn videoBreastfeeding in a ringslingWoven wrap tandem carry  with a woven wrapBack carry newborn (ONLY ATTEMPT IF YOU ARE EXPERIENCED)Studies referenced in the episode:Sinkiewicz-Darol E, Bernatowicz-Łojko U, Łubiech K, Adamczyk I, Twarużek M, Baranowska B, Skowron K, Spatz DL. Tandem Breastfeeding: A Descriptive Analysis of the Nutritional Value of Milk When Feeding a Younger and Older Child. Nutrients. 2021 Jan 19;13(1):277. doi: 10.3390/nu13010277. PMID: 33478010; PMCID: PMC7835967.Yate ZM. A Qualitative Study on Negative Emotions Triggered by Breastfeeding; Describing the Phenomenon of Breastfeeding/Nursing Aversion and Agitation in Breastfeeding Mothers. Iran J Nurs Midwifery Res. 2017 Nov-Dec;22(6):449-454. doi: 10.4103/ijnmr.IJNMR_235_16. PMID: 29184583; PMCID: PMC5684792.Supportive resources for navigating judgment while tandem feeding:Podcast episode on Navigating JudgmentAdventures in Tandem Nursing by Hilary Flowers, PhDKellyMom.com Tandem feedingWant to learn more from me? Watch my free, instant access workshop:  Designing Your Pathway to Toddler Breastfeeding Mastery Grab your free guide to say "No" to the feed while still saying "yes" to the need at  www.ownyourparentingstory.com/guideLove this episode?!  Shoot me a DM over on Instagram @own.your.parenting.story and tell me all about it.
42 - Breastfeeding a toddler while pregnant (part 2 of the tandem feeding series)
Feb 26 2024
42 - Breastfeeding a toddler while pregnant (part 2 of the tandem feeding series)
Finding out you are pregnant is a complex at the best of times.  Having concerns about safety for you and your growing baby, finding your life impacted in ways you never would have expected, and feeling emotions you didn't know were possible (thank you hormones!) are all normal things in pregnancy - but there is an added layer of concern and change when you conceive while you are currently breastfeeding. It's (unfortunately) common to immediately get advice from friends, family, and even doctors that you must wean for your well-being and the health of your fetus.  It's understood that breastfeeding during pregnancy has far more risks and benefits and continuing on is just foolish... or is it? In this week's podcast episode I bring together some of the lastest research & science around breastfeeding during pregnancy, as well as my own personal experience as a tandem feeding mom, and my professional experience as a toddler breastfeeding coach to give you the best information on: The safety of breastfeeding during pregnancyYour milk supply while pregnanPain & aversion during pregnancy while breastfeeding Weaning & making changes with your toddlerHit follow/subscribe to get notified when the 3rd and final part of this series drops!Much of the research I share in this podcast episode is from the 2nd edition of Dr. Hilary Flower's book: "Adventures in Tandem Nursing" Click to listen to the referenced episode on Milk Supply while breastfeeding a toddler. Stalimerou V, Dagla M, Vivilaki V, Orovou E, Antoniou E, Iliadou M. Breastfeeding During Pregnancy: A Systematic Review of the Literature. Maedica (Bucur). 2023 Sep;18(3):463-469. doi: 10.26574/maedica.2023.18.3.463. PMID: 38023747; PMCID: PMC10674114.Madarshahian F, Hassanabadi M. A comparative study of breastfeeding during pregnancy: impact on maternal and newborn outcomes. J Nurs Res. 2012 Mar;20(1):74-80. doi: 10.1097/JNR.0b013e31824777c1. PMID: 22333968.Want to learn more from me? Watch my free, instant access workshop:  Designing Your Pathway to Toddler Breastfeeding Mastery Grab your free guide to say "No" to the feed while still saying "yes" to the need at  www.ownyourparentingstory.com/guideLove this episode?!  Shoot me a DM over on Instagram @own.your.parenting.story and tell me all about it.
41: Getting pregnant (or not!) while breastfeeding a toddler (part 1 of the tandem feeding series)
Feb 19 2024
41: Getting pregnant (or not!) while breastfeeding a toddler (part 1 of the tandem feeding series)
Trying to understand your fertility while you are breastfeeding your toddler is an uphill battle. Sure - Google abounds with tips & information about conception and contraception, but less so about conception and contraception while you are breastfeeding... and finding support for making sense of those things while you are breastfeeding a TODDLER?!  ...virtually impossible. But, have no fear - your toddler breastfeeding guru is here! [insert Wonder Woman gif] In this half hour episode I have packed in: Considerations for timing your next pregnancy (or not!) and how there might be factors you are unaware of that could be increasing your stress, and impacting your day-to-day breastfeeding with your toddler. Tips for supporting your sex-life while breastfeeding A simplified breakdown of the menstrual cycle, the hormones involved, AND how they are impacted by breastfeeding. What is normal (and what is not) for your period when breastfeedingWhat contraceptive methods are compatible with breastfeeding (and WHY)Support to talk about fertility drugs with your doctor (before you decide to wean)How to be empowered to understand YOUR body better...and last but not least, how to support your body to move back into fertility while you are breastfeeding. Make sure to hit "follow" or "subscribe" so you don't miss next week's episode all about breastfeeding through pregnancy. Resources mentioned in the podcast: https://www.infantrisk.com/https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK501922/Resources I used in preparation for this episode: "The Second Baby Book"  by Sarah Ockwell Smith"Taking Charge of Your Fertility" by Toni WeschlerHeinig MJ, Nommsen-Rivers LA, Peerson JM, Dewey KG. Factors related to duration of postpartum amenorrhoea among USA women with prolonged lactation. J Biosoc Sci. 1994 Oct;26(4):517-27. doi: 10.1017/s0021932000021647. PMID: 7983102.Wilcox AJ, Weinberg CR, Baird DD. Timing of sexual intercourse in relation to ovulation. Effects on the probability of conception, survival of the pregnancy, and sex of the baby. N Engl J Med. 1995 Dec 7;333(23):1517-21. doi: 10.1056/NEJM199512073332301. PMID: 7477165.Want to learn more from me? Watch my free, instant access workshop:  Designing Your Pathway to Toddler Breastfeeding Mastery Grab your free guide to say "No" to the feed while still saying "yes" to the need at  www.ownyourparentingstory.com/guideLove this episode?!  Shoot me a DM over on Instagram @own.your.parenting.story and tell me all about it.
40: Breastfeeding Manners - what to do with demanding older babies, toddlers & preschoolers
Dec 18 2023
40: Breastfeeding Manners - what to do with demanding older babies, toddlers & preschoolers
The shirt-pulling, screaming, and demands to breastfeed have gotten to the point that you find yourself dreading them before your toddler has even thought about breastfeeding again. When they do, inevitably "ask" to breastfeed, the fear of reinforcing all of their bad behaviors reverberates through your body as you quickly try to decide if you will hold the boundary; or give in to their demands this time. ...and the guilt that comes from the fact that they "act" so poorly can be crushing.  Did you cause this behavior with your bad parenting?  Will they end up as disrespectful teenagers?  Will the choices you make today define their character as adults? Man - the pressure that mounts in those moments is crushing! But what if there is another way? In this final podcast episode of season 1 of Start to Stop Toddler Breastfeeding I break down: What respectful behaviour is and isn'tThe truth about the magic words: "Please" & "Thank You" Rewards, punishments & reinforcing behaviours How to support your child in the momentHow to raise an empathetic, respectful human who has integrityHow to support YOURSELF in the moment Looking for the episodes I mentioned at the beginning to re-listen to during the holidays? Episode 25: 5 Ways to Navigate Judgment & Social Pressure While Extended Breastfeeding Episode 23: Cavities, Teething & Toddler Biting While NursingEpisode 20: Breastfeeding A Sick Toddler: (Why, How & What to do when they are well again)Episode 13: Milk Supply - maintaining, upping & drying up after the first yearPicky Eating & Breastfeeding with Krystyn ParksReferences: Harvard Making Caring Common ProjectWant to learn more from me? Watch my free, instant access workshop:  Designing Your Pathway to Toddler Breastfeeding Mastery Grab your free guide to say "No" to the feed while still saying "yes" to the need at  www.ownyourparentingstory.com/guideLove this episode?!  Shoot me a DM over on Instagram @own.your.parenting.story and tell me all about it.
36: To wean or not to wean (for the unsure toddler breastfeeding momma)
Oct 25 2023
36: To wean or not to wean (for the unsure toddler breastfeeding momma)
Hands up if you have gone back & forth about whether or not you should wean your breastfeeding toddler?! 🙋‍♀️It makes sense - and trust me, you are NOT alone.  (It's one of the most common dilemmas "extended" breastfeeding moms face.) In this episode, I offer you an alternative to the "to wean or not to wean" conundrum that will have you feeling hopeful and empowered regardless of your weaning status. Key Takeaways:1. Self-Aggression vs. Self-Kindness:Understand the fundamental difference between self-aggression and self-kindness in parenting.How self-aggression can lead to unnecessary stress and conflict.2. Real-Life Examples of Self-Kindness:Learn practical examples of self-kindness in action.Setting healthy boundaries and nurturing personal needs.Offering self-compassion when breastfeeding & weaning3. The Impact on Parent-Child Relationships:Discover how embracing self-kindness can lead to a more harmonious and loving parent-child relationship.The importance of teaching self-kindness to your children.Click here to listen to episode #7 where I share more about the biological process of weaning & readiness. Want to learn more from me? Watch my free, instant access workshop:  Designing Your Pathway to Toddler Breastfeeding Mastery Grab your free guide to say "No" to the feed while still saying "yes" to the need at  www.ownyourparentingstory.com/guideLove this episode?!  Shoot me a DM over on Instagram @own.your.parenting.story and tell me all about it.
35: How to wean a clingy toddler from breastfeeding
Oct 23 2023
35: How to wean a clingy toddler from breastfeeding
In this episode, I discuss the challenges of weaning your booby-obsessed toddler when they're not quite ready to stop breastfeeding. I explore the role of internal experiences, stress, and co-regulation in this process.Key Points:You Can't Magically Make Them Ready: Unfortunately, you can't instantly make your toddler ready to wean - no matter how badly you might want to! It's important to understand that their internal experiences and feelings can't be changed on a whim - but that doesn't mean you don't have anything within your control...The Toddler Breastfeeding Stress Spiral: I delve into the "toddler breastfeeding stress cycle" where a stressed parent can lead to more frequent breastfeeding, creating a cycle of stress for both child and parent. This is the part you CAN control!Addressing Your Internal Experience: By addressing your own internal experiences and managing your stress, you can turn down the dial of intensity in your child's breastfeeding demands and clinginess.  But, your ability to influence your toddler's readiness doesn't stop there.External Stressors: Examine your child's environment to identify external stressors that might be affecting them. Reducing these stressors can empower your child to handle the stress associated with weaning more effectively.Empowering Your Child: Weaning is a big change, and if they haven't stopped breastfeeding on their own they probably aren't "ready to stop" - BUT if you have laid the foundation well, you can empower them to move through the change of weaning without too much stress.  And the stress that is there will be met with connection & co-regulation from you that will strengthen your bond. Upcoming Workshop: Don't forget to register for the upcoming workshop on October 27th at 2 p.m. Eastern, where I'll dive deeper into these topics and answer your questions. The replay will be available if you can't attend live.Stay Tuned: In the next podcast episode, I'll be talking about how to know if YOU are truly ready to wean. Thank you for tuning in to this episode.Want to learn more from me? Watch my free, instant access workshop:  Designing Your Pathway to Toddler Breastfeeding Mastery Grab your free guide to say "No" to the feed while still saying "yes" to the need at  www.ownyourparentingstory.com/guideLove this episode?!  Shoot me a DM over on Instagram @own.your.parenting.story and tell me all about it.
31: Why is my child waking so much?! Unpacking normal sleep & gentle strategies with Kim Hawley, MA, MPH, IBCLC & Holistic Sleep Coach (Intuitive Parenting DC)
Sep 11 2023
31: Why is my child waking so much?! Unpacking normal sleep & gentle strategies with Kim Hawley, MA, MPH, IBCLC & Holistic Sleep Coach (Intuitive Parenting DC)
Ever wished you could decode the enigma of infant and toddler sleep? As your guide through this labyrinth, I’m excited to bring you my engaging conversation with Kim Hawley, an expert in holistic sleep coaching, lactation consulting, and peaceful parenting education – a rare combination indeed! Drawing on Kim’s years of experience, we delve into the winding path of sleep in a child’s early years, distinguishing what’s normal, what's not, and how to respond when you're caught in the crosshairs of uncertainty.During our enlightening chat, Kim shares insights into her personal journey and how it led her to become a passionate advocate for biologically normal sleep in the modern world. We examine the range of factors that influence sleep in the first two years of life, from developmental milestones to temperamental traits and even medical issues like allergies. Kim shares insider tips on how parental sleep hygiene can positively impact their child's rest, and we shed a light on the often-overlooked importance of night feeds for not just nutrition, but also connection and co-regulation. Finally, we discuss the critical role of physical proximity and connection in a child's overall development. We shed light on why this instinct is deeply embedded in us, courtesy of our evolutionary past, and how it can be adapted to suit modern parenting. Tune in to discover practical advice on incorporating proximity and connection into your child's sleep routine, even if they're sleeping independently. Whether you're just embarking on the parenting journey or already navigating through sleepless nights, this conversation is brimming with invaluable insights that you won't want to miss.Kim Hawley, MA, MPH, IBCLC is a Holistic Sleep Coach, Lactation Consultant, Peaceful Parenting Educator, and the owner of Intuitive Parenting. She helps tired parents bring together developmental knowledge, sleep science, and their intuition to improve family sleep. Her specialty is holistic, responsive sleep support for babies, toddlers, and nursing families. She is the founder of Responsive Family Sleep, an online sleep support program for parents looking to support sleep without sleep training, and the host of the new podcast, The Responsive Family Sleep Podcast. Kim lives in Capitol Hill, Washington DC with her husband, 2 kids, guide dog, and cat. She loves running, listening to audio books, coffee, chocolate, and wine.Kim's Website: https://intuitiveparentingdc.com/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/intuitive_parenting_dcFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/intuitiveparentingdcKim's Comprehensive guide to normal sleep 0-5 years. Want to learn more from me? Watch my free, instant access workshop:  Designing Your Pathway to Toddler Breastfeeding Mastery Grab your free guide to say "No" to the feed while still saying "yes" to the need at  www.ownyourparentingstory.com/guideLove this episode?!  Shoot me a DM over on Instagram @own.your.parenting.story and tell me all about it.
30: Clogged Ducts, Engorgement & Mastitis in extended breastfeeding, weaning & beyond
Aug 28 2023
30: Clogged Ducts, Engorgement & Mastitis in extended breastfeeding, weaning & beyond
Engorgement, clogged ducts & mastitis are words all breastfeeding moms are familiar with. They can be scary & overwhelming, particularly at the beginning of your breastfeeding journey, but can pop up throughout the duration of time that you are breastfeeding - mainly when significant changes are happening in your life, including night weaning & complete weaning. To further complicate things, there has been a fundamental shift in the way that science and leading lactation organizations and experts understand these conditions - this has resulted in the Academy of Breastfeeding Medicine completely overhauling their Mastitis Proctol.  This means that the approach both lactating people & those who support them take when addressing engorgement, clogged ducts & mastitis has changed, or needs to change. This is relevant to those who are early in their breastfeeding experience, of course, but it’s ALSO relevant to those who have been breastfeeding for a year or more.   You are more likely to be supporting friends & family members when they are encountering these things, and you are more likely to be using methods you were told to use when you face them yourself - but those methods are likely based on an outdated understanding of what engorgement, clogged ducts & mastitis are and could be creating MORE issues than they are solving. In this episode I break down: -> The big change -> Each condition in the Mastitis Spectrum of Conditions-> Support for general treatment & prevention -> The role stress plays (and what to do about it)   DISCLAIMER: This podcast is for educational purposes only and is not intended to be medical advice. Resources & Citations: Academy of Breastfeeding Medicine Mastitis Protocol.Quoted study: Segerstrom, S. C., & Miller, G. E. (2006, July). Psychological stress and the human immune system: A meta-analytic study of 30 years of inquiry. Psychological bulletin. Study on EFT Tapping efficacy"Burn Out" Book by Emily & Amelia Nagoski Strains to look for in a probitic: Lactobacillus fermentum and Ligilactobacillus salivarius Want to learn more from me? Watch my free, instant access workshop:  Designing Your Pathway to Toddler Breastfeeding Mastery Grab your free guide to say "No" to the feed while still saying "yes" to the need at  www.ownyourparentingstory.com/guideLove this episode?!  Shoot me a DM over on Instagram @own.your.parenting.story and tell me all about it.