Dates & Mates with Damona Hoffman

Damona Hoffman - Dates and Mates Media

From navigating dating apps to overcoming the friendzone to seeking a soulmate, this ain’t your momma’s love advice! Hosted by the Official Love Expert of The Drew Barrymore Show and LA Times advice columnist, Damona Hoffman, Dates & Mates is jam-packed with interviews from your favorites celebs, authors, and experts. Dates & Mates is the 2022 Winner of The Best Podcast of the Year at The Black Podcasting Awards, #1 ranked love and relationship podcast by Cosmopolitan Magazine and a Top 10 Pick by HuffPost in the love category. read less

Our Editor's Take

In the podcast Dates & Mates with Damona Hoffman, expert dating coach Damona Hoffman shares her expertise in love. Her extensive expertise in the field of love and dating lead this show. She's been a columnist, media personality, and professional dating coach. That expertise-and her no-nonsense advice-make her a great host for this show. Whether listeners are single, looking, or in a relationship, they may learn something here.

Dates & Mates with Damona Hoffman has a mission to avoid being a typical love advice podcast. This show isn't about drama or gossip. It's about straightforward advice. A modern coach, Hoffman believes in being direct. That means her tips fit into the digital age, an era where dating has transformed, and the rules seem new. Traditional dating advice might not fit the modern dating scene- that's where she comes in.

For audiences seeking something new, Dates & Mates with Damona Hoffman is a good listen. Hoffman discusses tough subjects like ghosting, open relationships, and dating during a pandemic. In one episode, she talks about "relationshopping." In another, she discusses the phenomenon known as "love trauma." Does AI have a place in modern dating? Her episode about ChatGPT shares her advice on this subject.

This podcast is a good choice for anyone who's seeking help navigating the dating scene. Hoffman shares insight on how to create a strong dating profile. She talks about how to approach someone a listener has an interest in. She even shares when is the right time to define a relationship.

What's the deal with Therapy Tok? What about the modern dating world is giving the average dater the "ick?" Can astrology guide someone's dating process? No matter the topic, she delivers answers. Often, she invites expert guests on the show to share their advice and join the conversation. In some episodes, she directly involves the audience by answering write-in questions. Dates & Mates with Damona Hoffman drops new episodes each week.

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Society & CultureSociety & Culture

Episodes

Too Hot to Handle & Inner Intimacy
Aug 27 2024
Too Hot to Handle & Inner Intimacy
Brenden Durell, intimacy expert on Netflix's Too Hot To Handle, guides us towards a deeper connection within with exercises that he practiced on the show and inspired by his intimacy retreat. Our Dear Damona question this week is: I find myself falling for men who either go all in or don’t give me the time of day. How can I change my pattern? Follow Brenden on Instagram @BrendenDurell and be sure to check out his work at BrendenDurell.com Look out for his “Inspired Intimacy Challenge” on socials and the Intimacy in the Jungle retreat in October. And, we are enrolling NOW for Damona’s signature group coaching program, The Dates & Mates Method! If you’re ready to create a dating plan and date differently this fall, then this is the time to sign up. Don’t miss out on a limited number of spots in this annual program. Learn more at DamonaHoffman.com/method TIMESTAMPS Introduction to Intimacy (00:00:00) Mirror Work Begins (00:00:09) Understanding Intimacy (00:00:13) Brendan's Background (00:02:05) Location and Energy (00:02:41) Premise of "Too Hot to Handle" (00:04:19) Evolution of Brendan's Role (00:06:00) Mirror Exercise Explanation (00:08:05) Impact of Reality TV (00:10:07) Apologizing to Oneself (00:11:23) Historical Context of Mirrors (00:12:23) Power of Self-Forgiveness (00:14:26) Intimacy Retreats (00:16:49) The Connection with Mother Earth (00:18:00) City Slicker vs. Nature (00:18:18) Walking Through Discomfort (00:19:17) Presence in the Moment (00:20:22) Reframing Time Pressure (00:24:51) Rites of Passage Experience (00:26:08) Intimacy in the Jungle Retreat (00:28:46) Embracing the Unknown (00:30:09) Renegotiating Commitments (00:32:35) God Exists in Everything (00:34:00) Exploring Intimacy Across Cultures (00:34:46) Curiosity in Personal Growth (00:35:52) Demystifying Intimacy (00:36:40) Reframing Perspectives on Pleasure (00:36:51) Listener's Dating Struggles (00:38:49) Prioritizing Self-Love (00:40:02) Understanding Relationship Patterns (00:41:08) Setting Boundaries in Dating (00:42:39) The Importance of Inner Intimacy (00:45:26) Invitation to Join the Program (00:46:32) Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
TherapyJeff & Down to DM
Aug 20 2024
TherapyJeff & Down to DM
Jeff Guenther, AKA TherapyJeff on Instagram, joins Damona in the premiere of Season 12 of Dates & Mates for a state of the date address! They cover all phases of the dating journey from clarifying what you’re seeking to first dates, defining the relationship and even planning for the dreaded breakup. The Dear Damona question this week is: What’s the best way to reach out to someone new on LinkedIn? Be sure to follow Jeff on Instagram @TherapyJeff and grab a copy of his new book, Big Dating Energy, on shelves now! And get Damona’s bestselling book “F the Fairy Tale” in ebook, audiobook, and hardcover everywhere books are sold (FtheFairyTaleBook.com) This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Get convenient, online therapy with BetterHelp. Visit BetterHelp.com/DATESANDMATES today to get 10% off your first month. TIMESTAMPS Introduction to Season 12 (00:00:00) Overview of the Episode (00:02:06) Introducing Therapy Jeff (00:04:29) Jeff's Book Release (00:05:00) Collaborating with an Ex (00:06:47) Personal Insights in the Book (00:08:48) Clarifying Deal Breakers (00:12:04) Understanding Relationship Needs (00:15:18) The Role of Fears in Dating (00:18:31) Dating Apps Discussion (00:20:07) The Impact of Dating Apps on Love (23:20) The Shift in Dating Dynamics (23:41) Boundaries with Technology (24:27) The Need for Healthy Relationships (27:48) Imagining Ideal Dating Apps (28:16) Cultural Changes in Dating Apps (29:39) Tips for Long-term Relationship Survival (30:19) Navigating Conflict in Relationships (31:59) Communication After Intimacy (33:10) Creating Sexual Energy (35:24) Understanding Breakups (36:45) Ethical Breakup Practices (39:05) The Value of Planning in Relationships (41:38) The Intimacy of Breakup Conversations (43:09) Listener Question on LinkedIn Outreach (44:02) Introduction and Connector Circle (00:46:04) Sliding into DMs (00:46:59) Approaching on LinkedIn (00:48:11) Navigating Online Connections (00:49:19) Promoting the Dates & Mates Method (00:50:16) Call for Listener Questions (00:51:13) Wrap-Up and Guest Teaser (00:52:06) Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Dating Solutions: The Communication & Trust Pillars
Aug 13 2024
Dating Solutions: The Communication & Trust Pillars
We all hope to feel something special on that first date, but true love takes time, and so does trust. Damona debunks The Chemistry Myth and The Soulmate Myth while offering real solutions to today’s dating troubles. Based on themes from her new book, F The Fairy Tale, this episode highlights The Goals Pillar and The Values Pillar in a conversation between Damona and love and relationship experts, Carol Allen & Katherine Woodward, in one of the top panels from the F the Fairy Tale Forum last year. Be sure to follow Carol on Instagram @CarolAllenAstrologer and get a special discount on her annual personal success calendar at DamonaHoffman.com/mycalendar And, be sure to follow Katherine on Instagram @KatherineWoodwardThomas and check out her work at KatherineWoodwardThomas.com Get Damona’s bestselling book “F the Fairy Tale” in ebook, audiobook, and hardcover everywhere books are sold (FtheFairyTaleBook.com) This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Get convenient, online therapy with BetterHelp. Visit BetterHelp.com/DATESANDMATES today to get 10% off your first month. TIMESTAMPS (00:00:00) Introduction to the Episode  (00:01:07) Transition to Communication and Trust  (00:02:04) The Chemistry Myth  (00:03:05) Introducing Guests Katherine and Carol  (00:03:56) Insights on Communication  (00:06:45) Astrological Compatibility Discussion  (00:10:10) Understanding Relationship Dynamics  (00:14:23) Scarcity Mindset in Dating  (00:18:08) Listener Questions and Support  (00:19:13) Dating Fatigue at 26  (00:20:10) Late Bloomers in Love  (00:22:19) Faith and Trust in Dating  (00:24:09) Top Dealbreakers in Relationships  (00:25:42) Self-Reflection in Relationships  (00:27:54) Abundant Mindset Tips  (00:29:31) From Wallflower to Proficient Dater  (00:30:12) Strategic Dating Approach  (00:32:27) Promoting Personal Success Calendars  (00:33:20) Book Reviews and Community Engagement Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Dating Solutions: The Goals & Values Pillars
Aug 6 2024
Dating Solutions: The Goals & Values Pillars
It’s tempting to date by a list of preferred qualities and a set of prescribed rules, but these myths prevent singles from discovering more fulfilling relationships. Damona debunks The List Myth and The Rules Myth and offers real solutions to today’s common dating problems. Based on themes from her new book, F The Fairy Tale, this episode highlights The Goals Pillar and The Values Pillar in a conversation between Damona and love and relationship experts, Orna and Matthew Walters and Evan Marc Katz. Be sure to follow Evan on Instagram @RealEvanMarcKatz and check out his work at EvanMarcKatz.com And, be sure to follow Orna and Matthew on Instagram @OrnaAndMatthew and pre-order their new book at Barnes & Noble, Getting It Right This Time by visiting: https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/getting-it-right-this-time-orna-walters/1145412458 Get Damona’s bestselling book “F the Fairy Tale” in ebook, audiobook, and hardcover everywhere books are sold (FtheFairyTaleBook.com) This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Get convenient, online therapy with BetterHelp. Visit BetterHelp.com/DATESANDMATES today to get 10% off your first month. TIMESTAMPS (00:00:00) Introduction to the Episode  (00:01:05) The Goals and Values Pillars  (00:02:10) Breaking the Rules Myth  (00:03:18) Introduction of Guests  (00:06:12) The Importance of Values  (00:08:03) Engaging Conversations  (00:11:01) Understanding Love Imprints  (00:12:36) The Role of the Subconscious  (00:14:03) Client-Centered Approach  (00:15:50) Masterclass on Attraction  (00:16:26) Listener Questions Segment  (00:16:50) Evan's Jdate Experience  (00:18:07) Crafting a Great Profile  (00:19:57) Storytelling in Profiles  (00:21:09) Best Dating Sites for Older Women  (00:22:11) Pressure on Dating Apps  (00:23:40) Women’s Standards in Dating  (00:24:46) Meeting Men Outside Comfort Zones  (00:26:47) Investment in Dating  (00:28:22) Closing Remarks and Book Promotion  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
The Rules Myth & Meaningful Connections
Jul 16 2024
The Rules Myth & Meaningful Connections
Swipe apps have gamified dating but that doesn’t mean you have to play it their way! Damona dives deep into The Rules Myth with love and relationship experts Ariel Ford and Francesca Hoagie in one of her favorite panels from the F the The Fairy Tale Forum last year. Together they address how singles are hungry for shortcuts to finding love and reveal why this approach may be preventing them from making fulfilling connections. Get Damona’s bestselling book “F the Fairy Tale” in ebook, audiobook, and hardcover everywhere books are sold (FtheFairyTaleBook.com) Then join our Book Squad! If you review “F The Fairy Tale” and submit it at DamonaHoffman.com/booksquad before July 31st, you’ll be invited to an exclusive Q&A session with Damona! Follow Arielle Ford on Instagram @ArielleFord_author and pick up a copy of her international bestseller, “THE SOULMATE SECRET: Manifest The Love of Your Life With The Law of Attraction”. Follow Francesca Hogi on Instagram @DearFranny and check out the Dear Franny Podcast! This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Get convenient, online therapy with BetterHelp. Visit BetterHelp.com/DATESANDMATES today to get 10% off your first month. TIMESTAMPS (00:00:00) Dates & Mates Intro (00:01:06) The rules myth  (00:02:10) Introduction of Ariel Ford and Francesca Hogi  (00:04:34) Defining love  (00:06:30) Navigating dating without rules  (00:09:08) Evolution of relationships  (00:13:13) Existence of soulmates  (00:16:58) Meeting people outside of dating apps  (00:18:02) The potential of organic connections  (00:19:52) Manifesting love and the meet cute mindset  (00:21:36) The abundance mindset and love before first sight  (00:26:06) Dating in midlife and redefining compatibility  (00:29:44) Embracing the process of dating and love skills Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Jillian On Love & Finding The One
Jun 25 2024
Jillian On Love & Finding The One
Jillian Turecki, certified relationship coach and host of the Jillian On Love podcast, joins us for our Dates & Mates Season 11 finale! She and Damona explore why the fantasy of "The One" captivates us, and how this desire often masks a need for personal healing and growth. We are bringing back the Romance Rollback this week with: Surprising Facts About the Evolution of Dating  Then our Dear Damona question this week is: My dates keep ditching me… for my brother! What can I do? Follow Jillian at @JillianTurecki and you can become of member of Jillian’s relationship school by visiting JillianTurecki.com/membership To read the Mental Floss piece on the Evolution of dating visit: mentalfloss.com/article/79140/10-fascinating-facts-about-evolution-dating-and-courtship Get Damona’s bestselling book “F the Fairy Tale” in ebook, audiobook, and hardcover everywhere books are sold (FtheFairyTaleBook.com) Dates & Mates is sponsored by Betterhelp. Get convenient, online therapy with BetterHelp. Visit BetterHelp.com/DATESANDMATES today to get 10% off your first month. TIMESTAMPS (00:03:40) The romance rollback  (00:11:28) Introduction of Jillian Turecki  (00:14:52) The myth of the one  (00:20:34) The concept of "the one"  (00:23:50) Reasons for being single  (00:30:04) Challenges in building trust  (00:35:02) The evolving dating landscape  (00:36:08) Missions in relationship coaching  (00:40:16) Making Dating Safer for Women  (00:42:07) The Responsibility of Men in Dating Safety (00:51:38) Impact of Attractiveness of Family Members on Dating Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Feng Shui Love & Dating Burnout Breakthrough
Jun 18 2024
Feng Shui Love & Dating Burnout Breakthrough
Inessa Freya, international feng shui master and spiritual psychologist, reveals how simple changes in your home can attract new romantic possibilities, improve your current relationships, and bring a sense of harmony and balance that radiates from the inside out. Plus, Damona shares why she credits Inessa for being a part of bringing Mr. Hoffman into her life! But first we have a surprising dating dish to serve up for you: Move over healthcare! Could dating apps be the new benefit? Then our Dear Damona question this week is: Dating Burnout is real!!! How do I remain positive when I am struggling to find my match? Follow Inessa on Instagram @Inessa_Freya and learn more about her work by visiting www.fengshuifromtheheart.com Read the Forbes piece: forbes.com/sites/soulaimagourani/2024/06/04/dating-services-as-a-future-company-perk/?sh=5df2e008459a Read the Independent piece: https://sg.news.yahoo.com/tokyo-launch-first-government-run-091413507.html Get convenient, online therapy with BetterHelp. Visit BetterHelp.com/DATESANDMATES today to get 10% off your first month. Dates & Mates is sponsored by Betterhelp. TIMESTAMPS TIMESTAMPS (00:00:15) The introduction to Feng Shui (00:02:24) Dating apps as employee benefits  (00:06:20) Government-sponsored dating apps  (00:08:59) Introduction to Inessa Freya (00:10:36) Understanding Feng Shui  (00:12:39) Personal experiences with Feng Shui (00:18:01) Clearing up energy and finding love (00:19:52) Visualizing love and moving for love (00:24:32) Feng Shui principles and applying them (00:26:33) Decluttering and space clearing  (00:33:13) Space Clearing with Intention  (00:33:47) Impact of Objects on Energy  (00:35:14) Moving and Arranging Items  (00:35:55) Feng Shui Rules for Bed Placement  (00:39:38) Ancient Aspects of Feng Shui  (00:42:00) Maintaining a Positive Dating Mindset  (00:47:35) Challenging Societal Narratives  (00:48:42) Attracting Someone  (00:49:52) Mindset and Clarity  (00:50:50) The Five Dating Loops  (00:51:57) Setting Intentions  (00:53:03) Upcoming Season Finale  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Main Character Energy & Moving Too Fast
Jun 11 2024
Main Character Energy & Moving Too Fast
Lily Womble, host of the Date Brazen podcast, shares insights from her new book, “Thank You, More Please” so that you can navigate the dating world with eyes wide open and a little main character energy. Plus, she will share how to know when it's time for a dating detox.  The Dating Dish story this week is based on new findings from Tinder: The Green Flags Study on Assumptions & Dating Then our Dear Damona question this week is: How fast is too fast when dating a new match? Follow Lily on Instagram @DateBrazen and be sure to grab a copy of her new book, “Thank You, More Please”. Read the Tinder study by visiting: tinderpressroom.com/The-Green-Flags-Study#assets_all Get convenient, online therapy with BetterHelp. Visit BetterHelp.com/DATESANDMATES today to get 10% off your first month. Dates & Mates is sponsored by Betterhelp. TIMESTAMPS (00:00:00) Intro (00:01:38) Tinder's "Green Flag Study" on assumptions in dating  (00:05:47) Challenges in modern dating  (00:07:00) Creating positive dating experiences  (00:14:57) Criticism of dating apps  (00:17:24) The challenges of modern dating  (00:18:36) Design of dating apps  (00:19:01) Impact of dating apps on users  (00:21:23) Dependency on dating apps  (00:22:22) Main character energy in dating  (00:25:57) The practice of dating skills  (00:30:15) Challenging societal messaging  (00:29:11) Bragging on a date  (00:34:22) Brazen Bragging  (00:38:08) Essence Based Preferences  (00:42:18) Dating Detox: When and Why  (00:48:28) Importance of Intentional Dating  (00:49:21) Navigating Relationship Preparation  (00:49:58) Lily Womble's new book, "Thank You More Please"  (00:50:27) Listener Question: Relationship Pace  (00:51:52) The Notion of "Slow Love"  (00:53:06) Balancing New Love and Personal Life  (00:55:21) Cherishing New Love  (00:56:32) Invitation for Questions and Future Episode Preview Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
First Dates & Old Flames
Jun 4 2024
First Dates & Old Flames
Mat Boggs, YouTube dating coach, sets you up for your best first date yet as he covers everything from red flags and conversation topics to knowing how much time to invest in a match. The Dating Dish story this week comes from Mashable: Dating Culture Has Become Selfish. How Do We Fix It? Then our Dear Damona question this week is: An old flame invited me to their big birthday bash in Cabo. Should I go? Follow Mat on Youtube @MatBoggs and check out his MANifest Your Man Program by visiting: https://www.bravethinkinginstitute.com/love-relationships/resources/mym/offer/strategy-session Read the Mashable story at: mashable.com/article/selfish-dating-app-culture Get convenient, online therapy with BetterHelp. Visit BetterHelp.com/DATESANDMATES today to get 10% off your first month. Dates & Mates is sponsored by Betterhelp. TIMESTAMPS (00:00:12) First dates: The gateway to new possibilities  (00:01:57) Dating culture: A selfish era  (00:04:35) The capitalist mindset and dating (00:08:45) Rethinking the approach to dating (00:10:22) Do's and don'ts of first dates (00:17:47) Red Flags in Dating  (00:18:38) Internal Repetitive Energy  (00:19:35) Internal GPS System  (00:21:28) Manipulative Behaviors (00:23:04) Vibration for Long-Lasting Love  (00:24:35) Compatibility of Interests  (00:25:42) Mindset and Deal Breakers  (00:26:37) Mindset for Online Dating  (00:29:50) Intentional Action in Dating (00:30:51) Sharing on First Dates  (00:33:30) Whose hands are you going to put this baby into? (00:35:33)Shifting the conversation  (00:36:33) Mel's authentic approach (00:43:46) Dear Damona - Tracy's dilemma  (00:45:17) Damona's advice to Tracy  (00:49:06) Happy Birthday and Letting Go  (00:50:17) Lily Womble Up Next Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Addicted to Drama & I Can Fix Him
May 7 2024
Addicted to Drama & I Can Fix Him
Dr. Scott Lyons, host of The Gently Used Human podcast, talks about his new book, “Addicted to Drama: Healing Dependency on Crisis & Chaos In Yourself & Others”. This week’s Dating Dish is: HuffPost shares the reasons why we try to “fix” our matches…and what you should probably do instead. Then our Dear Damona question this week is: How can I attract more culturally open matches? Follow Scott on Instagram @DrScottLyons and be sure to grab a copy of his book! Share the love: Get your copy of Damona’s book  F the Fairy Tale on Amazon too and leave a review and Damona could shout you out on an upcoming episode! HuffPost article https://www.huffpost.com/entry/taylor-swift-fix-him-relationships_l_662a5511e4b005d7bf0cbef0 TIMESTAMPS (00:01:36) Why do we try to fix people in our relationships? (00:08:09) Introduction of Dr. Scott Lyons (00:13:32) Causes of addiction to drama (00:17:24) Origin of addiction to drama (00:18:09) Ecosystem and Turbulence (00:19:27) Numbness and Seeking Sensation (00:24:02) Addiction to Drama and Dating Apps (00:27:00) Attentional Economy and Social Media (00:33:13) Interrupting Peace and News Consumption (00:35:26) Dating App Activation and Frameworks (00:37:21) Awareness and Reflexive Behavior (00:38:01) Avoidance Tactics (00:38:24) Escaping Chaos (00:39:30) Milestones of Healing (00:42:41) Processing Trauma (00:43:42) Belonging and Identity (00:47:02) Cultural Diversity in Dating Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Psychic Matchmaker & Digital Body Language
Apr 23 2024
Psychic Matchmaker & Digital Body Language
Psychic Matchmaker Deborah Graham teaches singles to dial into their own psychic intuition. Plus, she shares her experiences as a psychic matchmaker, and her own story of being intuitively matched as well. Then, she gives a jaw-dropping live, on-air love reading. The Dating Dish this week is: Beware of Digital Body Language while you’re online dating. The Dear Damona questionis: What signs indicate that a person might be leaning towards commitment? Follow her on Instagram @PsychicDeborahGraham and learn more about her work by visiting psychicdeborahgraham.com F the Fairy Tale readers, the Dating Accelerator Program is open for on-going enrollment. Join today and get access to private livestreams with Damona just for VIP clients and Dating Accelerator students at DamonaHoffman.com/program TIMESTAMPS 00:00:00 Intuition in Dating 00:02:32 Digital Body Language 00:13:15 Psychic Matchmaker's Introduction 00:14:39 Realization of Psychic Gifts 00:16:05 Limitations of Using Psychic Gifts 00:16:18 Arranged Marriage 00:17:49 Psychic Abilities 00:20:18 Beginning of Psychic Matchmaking 00:23:36 Mission and Intuition 00:25:48 Reading Energy and Intuition 00:27:49 Internal Compass and Muscle Testing 00:30:20 Silence and Energy Communication 00:30:48 Silence and Intuition 00:31:44 Psychic Reading for Producer Lindsey 00:33:27 Revelation about L's Past Relationship 00:38:33 Dating Rules and Intuition 00:41:16 Avoiding Ghosting and Dating Process 00:45:01 Early Phase Dating 00:46:06 Reframing Expectations 00:47:18 Enjoying the Process 00:48:13 Clarity and Guidance Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices