Pause to Remember

Amy Pelkey, MSN, CRNA, RYT 200

Supporting healthcare providers who have experienced pregnancy or infant loss with conversations, resources, and mindfulness practices. read less
Health & FitnessHealth & Fitness

Episodes

35. Compassionate Guidance: Navigating TFMR & Grief With Mandy Wannarka, LICSW
Jun 13 2024
35. Compassionate Guidance: Navigating TFMR & Grief With Mandy Wannarka, LICSW
Host Amy Pelkey speaks with Mandy Wannarka, LICSW, PMH-C, RYT-200, a therapist specializing in supporting mothers and couples through the difficult journey of pregnancy and infant loss, including making the decision to terminate a pregnancy for medical reasons (TFMR). Mandy shares insights from her career in social work, focusing on her experience with the perinatal population in hospital settings and now in her outpatient mental health practice called Mindful Wellbeing Clinic in Coon Rapids, MN. They discuss the emotional toll of medical terminations, how to make informed decisions, and the importance of finding supportive community and professional resources. Mandy also introduces therapeutic approaches like EMDR and mindfulness to help individuals process their emotions and build resilience. This episode aims to offer compassionate guidance and a sense of community for healthcare providers and other parents navigating this challenging topic.00:00 Introduction to a Heartbreaking Decision00:36 Meet the Host: Amy Pelkey01:26 Introducing Mandy Wannarka02:31 Mandy's Journey into Perinatal Support03:40 Challenges and Transitions in Hospital Settings04:52 Establishing an Outpatient Mental Health Practice05:08 Supporting Families with Complex Medical Journeys09:31 Empowered Boundary Setting15:43 Navigating Family Dynamics and Unsolicited Opinions19:37 Returning to Work After a Loss25:10 Trauma-Informed Care and EMDR31:55 Unpacking Childhood Trauma33:18 Addressing Immediate Needs35:13 Coping Mechanisms and Maladaptive Behaviors37:21 Navigating Grief in Relationships44:20 Pharmacological Options and Therapy48:41 Mindfulness and Self-Compassion54:59 Finding the Right Therapist57:42 Final Thoughts and SupportLinksMindful Wellbeing Clinic 199 Coon Rapids Blvd NW, Suite 208, Coon Rapids, MN 55433; phone (612) 440-1899; email: hello@mindfulwellbeingmn.comPostpartum Support International (PPI)PSI TFMR Support GroupsPSI Directory to find a providerPerinatal Mental Health Certification (PMH-C)Pause to RememberVirtual Support Group (monthly), Facebook Groups, eBook, Be a guest on the Pause to Remember Podcast, complete this formPause to Remember - Website, Instagram, Facebook, YouTube, Pinterest Amy Pelkey, MSN, CRNA, RYT-200 - Speaker at conferences & websiteSupport Pause to Remember by donating
33. Grief & Faith: Insights from Rev. Daryl Lavway
Sep 7 2023
33. Grief & Faith: Insights from Rev. Daryl Lavway
Reverend Daryl Lavway engages in a meaningful conversation with host Amy Pelkey, CRNA.  Leveraging his extensive ministry experience and role as a chaplain in a Level 1, academic, medical center, Daryl provides profound insights into the intersection of grief and faith.Five key points discussed include:Unhelpful religious comments like, "It was God's will,” or "God needed another angel,” can be challenged with, "How do you know?"The complex relationship between religion and grief (including church)God grieves with usUsing faith as a comforting tool if it feels right to youAvoiding isolation and seeking trustworthy support with an individual or communityDaryl's insights offer a fresh perspective on how to approach religious comments, embrace your faith, and seek meaningful support with the help of an individual or community. He reminds listeners to trust their instincts honoring the memory of your baby.  Read more here.If you have questions or would like to connect with Daryl, email: amy@puasetoremember.org.Pause to Remember Resources for female, healthcare providers grieving after pregnancy and infant loss:Facebook Group, Virtual Support Group, Amy's Calendar to talk 1:1, eBook - A Guide After Pregnancy & Infant Loss, Refer a provider (therapist, counselor, psychiatrist, etc), Be a guest on the podcast, Contact AmyWhere to find Pause to Remember Website, Be a guest on the Pause to Remember Podcast, complete this formPause to Remember - Website, Instagram, Facebook, YouTube, Pinterest Amy Pelkey, MSN, CRNA, RYT-200 - Speaker at conferences & websiteSupport Pause to Remember by donating
32. Navigating Burnout with Dr. Errin Weisman, DO
Jun 1 2023
32. Navigating Burnout with Dr. Errin Weisman, DO
Dr. Errin Weisman is a burnout coach, mentor, speaker, podcaster, and friend.   She shares her experience with burnout that began in medical school and escalated during her residency and early years as an attending physician.  This led to her feeling trapped.The episode highlights the impact of the pandemic on burnout and the challenges faced by healthcare professionals.  Dr. Weisman emphasizes the importance of seeking support, finding a community, and making changes to overcome burnout. The conversation explores topics like self-discovery, navigating grief, and making assertive choices. Financial concerns, prioritizing mental health, and addressing work addiction are also discussed. Find inspiration and resources to deal with burnout by listening to the conversation.Mentioned in the podcast:Life coach, Philippa Kennealy, MDDr. Kara PepperDr. Michelle QuirkConnect with Dr. Errin Weisman:Email: hello@burntouttobadass.comWebsite: https://www.burntouttobadass.com/ and https://www.doctormefirst.com/Podcast: Burntout to Badass and Doctor Me FirstInstagram: @errinweisman and @burntout_to_badassBlog post with additional information is here.Pause to Remember Resources for Healthcare Providers Grieving After Pregnancy and Infant LossFacebook Group, Virtual Support Group, Be a guest on the Pause to Remember Podcast, complete this formPause to Remember - Website, Instagram, Facebook, YouTube, Pinterest Amy Pelkey, MSN, CRNA, RYT-200 - Speaker at conferences & websiteSupport Pause to Remember by donating
27. Bailey Dykema, CRNA - Infertility, Miscarriage, Stress, & Self-Care
Mar 2 2023
27. Bailey Dykema, CRNA - Infertility, Miscarriage, Stress, & Self-Care
Bailey Dykema, CRNA works in Minnesota at a critical access hospital.  She has been on a four year infertility journey (IUI and IVF) and experienced a miscarriage in November 2022.Bailey shares her experiences with:PCOS, hypothalamic amenorrhea, and nutritional issues related to overtraining/HIIT workoutsStress related to moving, getting married, starting a new job/career, COVID-19, infertility, financial strain of paying for fertility treatments, draining PTOSelf care includes therapy with Debbie Fischer at Partners (in)fertility, taking time off from work, changing her workouts, and Fertility Hope YogaCommunity support including Hugh and Grace and Mom's In the MakingHolistic/functional medicine approach to infertility, questioning what is in our environment, in our personal care products, and endocrine disruptorsBailey recommends Dr. Hopeman at the Center for Reproductive Medicine in MinneapolisYou can connect with Bailey on Instagram @mrs_dykemaFind more resources in this blog post. Pause to Remember InformationNEW OFFERING IN 2023!  -  MNDFL Rx (Mindful Prescription) A 4-week mindfulness based grief course for healthcare providers grieving after pregnancy or infant loss.  Learn more and sign up for the March 2023 group or private options Be a guest on the Pause to Remember Podcast, complete this formPause to Remember - Website, Instagram, Facebook, YouTube, Pinterest Amy Pelkey, MSN, CRNA, RYT-200 - Speaker at conferences & websiteSupport Pause to Remember by donating
25.  Grieving Children with Sara Asch
Feb 2 2023
25. Grieving Children with Sara Asch
Sara Asch, from The Center for Grieving Children, in Portland, Maine, works closely with families, volunteers, and the community in the areas of grief and loss, program development, outreach, and training.Sara offered many suggestions and insights regarding grieving children.  Some include:Sitting with difficult news about a life limiting diagnosis or a pregnancy or infant loss before sharing it with your living children.  Acknowledge your feelings and begin your grief work first.Think about what the next few days or weeks might look like for you and your family.Model and show some of your feelings feelings for your children when you are talking to them.Tears are an indication of sadness and that is OK.Stay away from euphemisms.  They are confusing.  Use the words "die" and "death."Let your children know you are always open to talking about the baby, death, and dying.A toy or favorite blanket may bring comfort to young children during difficult conversations.  Avoid bringing up death at bedtime.If your baby dies at the hospital, follow your children's cues for visiting.  Give them a choice about seeing the baby.  Prepare them before the visit.  Have a trusted adult bring them and be available to take the sibling(s) home.Suggestions to honor your baby's memory.Help your children learn to express feelings. Behavior and clues to watch for if your child is struggling after loss.Navigating bereavement resources.  Peer support groups are helpful.Tell children the truth so they do not imagine the worse.Recommended Books:  (Note: If you decide to purchase through these links, the Pause to Remember receives a small commission at no extra cost to you.)Life Is Like the Wind by Shona Innes (age 4+)The Goodbye Book by Todd Parr (age 2-4)Be a guest on the Pause to Remember Podcast, complete this formPause to Remember - Website, Instagram, Facebook, YouTube, Pinterest Amy Pelkey, MSN, CRNA, RYT-200 - Speaker at conferences & websiteSupport Pause to Remember by donating
23.  Sex After Pregnancy Loss with David Allsop, MS, CFLE, CNP
Nov 3 2022
23. Sex After Pregnancy Loss with David Allsop, MS, CFLE, CNP
David Allsop, MS, CFLE, CNP is completing his PhD in the Department of Psychology and Neuroscience at Dalhousie University in Halifax, Nova Scotia.He is investigating how sexual wellbeing changes after pregnancy loss and hopes to better understand the experiences of the couples in the ALOE study.ALOE stands for Acknowledging Loss Outcomes and Experiences.  Couples can participate in the ALOE study if they have:Have experienced a pregnancy loss within the past 4 monthsHave been in a relationship with their partner for a year or moreAre not currently or recently receiving fertility treatmentEach partner must be willing to complete a survey (30-45 minutes) once a month for four months.  They will be compensated.  You can sign up here or contact the team by email: ALOE@Dal.caIn this episode we talked about how sexual health impacts both mental health and happiness.  Samantha Joel's research about predictors of relationship quality is mentioned.  Sexual satisfaction is a predictor or a good relationship.Researchers know little about how pregnancy loss affects couples’ sexual relationships, which makes it difficult for couples to get the help they need after a loss.  Studying this is fairly new.  There are only three empirical studies on this topic.  One trend in the data includes mothers having a decreased sexual desire after loss.The research that showed 42% of surgeons had experienced pregnancy loss was in 2021 in JAMA Surgery.  You can access it here.Natalie Rosen - Couples and Sexual Health ResearchDavid Allsop's email: David.Allsop@dal.caPause to Remember Resources for Healthcare Providers Grieving After Pregnancy and Infant LossFacebook GroupBe a guest on the Pause to Remember Podcast, complete this formPause to Remember - Website, Instagram, Facebook, YouTube, Pinterest Amy Pelkey, MSN, CRNA, RYT-200 - Speaker at conferences & websiteSupport Pause to Remember by donating
17. Brenda Behan, LSW Talks About Losing Tucker and MS While Pregnant
Sep 15 2022
17. Brenda Behan, LSW Talks About Losing Tucker and MS While Pregnant
Brenda Behan, LSW, learned there was something wrong with her son, Tucker, when a cystic hygroma was detected at her first ultrasound appointment.At that time, she was experiencing numbness on the right side of her body.  Soon after, a large lesion was detected on her brain stem, MS was diagnosed, and treatment began.Brenda had many difficult decisions to make including:Continuing to work in her "dream job" or take care of herselfTerminate her pregnancy or carry TuckerLeave or stay in her marriageGetting help from a therapistTucker's memory is preserved through the work Brenda and her husband, Trevor, do through Good Day Racing.Want a free eBook and receive a weekly email from Pause to Remember? Click hereVirtual Support Group for Healthcare Providers after pregnancy and infant loss2nd Monday of every month7:45-8:45pm ESTLed by Amy Pelkey, CRNA and Whitney Jablonski, CRNAVia Zoom - get the link and updates hereThis is for female, licensed healthcare providers grieving after pregnancy or infant lossFREE YOGA with the Pause to Remember CommunityLed by Amy Pelkey, MSN, CRNA, RYT 200This is for healthcare providers grieving after pregnancy or infant loss. There will be time for gathering and conversation if you would like to talk with othersClick HERE for information and link to join (future dates will be added here)  Where to find Pause to RememberWebsiteInstagramFacebook Support Pause to Remember  - "Be a guest on the Pause to Remember Podcast, complete this formPause to Remember - Website, Instagram, Facebook, YouTube, Pinterest Amy Pelkey, MSN, CRNA, RYT-200 - Speaker at conferences & websiteSupport Pause to Remember by donating