So this is a Jean-Luc Godard film and he was like super famous and lived to be 91 and he's considered by many to be the pioneer of French New Wave cinema and this is one of his films and it stars his real-life wife at the time and it's so tragic and sad and poetic and artsy and experimental and follows this young woman who long story short ends up going into prostitution to get money because like her life is a mess and she has a baby and a husband who doesn't want her and it's all in black and white and super bleak and the lead character's name is Nana Kleinfrankenheim.TRAILER: https://youtu.be/ZAZGR5O33jw

So Robert Mitchum was this super famous actor and he was best known for playing villains in two very spooky films but it turns out I was wrong and he's actually better known for playing leads in film noirs that I had never heard of and in this one he's this guy who's trying to start a new life and escape from his shady past where he fell for this woman who was involved with this shady guy and the shady guy is Kirk Douglas in one of his very early roles and like a bunch of stuff happens and there's betrayal and you can't tell who's lying or not and film noir film noir film noir film noir film noir film noir film noir film noir film noir film noir film noir film noir.TRAILER: https://youtu.be/qiIB8Y8PBe8

Kurosawaaaaaaaaaa UGHHHH this man was such a genius so he usually made big action epics but this movie isn't that at all and it's like this heavy drama that's very sad but also positive but also pessimistic so it's positively pessimistic haha I'm funny no jk OK so in this movie there's this sad older guy whose son barely notices him and he's a widower and he founds out he has cancer and is going to die and so he decides what are the best ways for him to change his life before his mortality and so he like gets drunk and becomes acquainted with this much younger woman but not in a romantic way and overall this is just a great film about how we should all and can always improve our lives and should and you don't have to be dying to change your life and life is life and live life and life. Life.TRAILER: https://youtu.be/2VeLN3IDjzQ

Oh me oh my OK so this film is so intense and depressing but DAY-UM it's by Luis Buñuel who is like super into weird symbolism and imagery and surrealism and meat and animals like chickens and ants and no don't worry this movie isn't trippy I mean it kinda is but it's overall a really powerful drama about a group of poor kids living in a slum of Mexico City and there's this bad young guy who escaped juvenile and this poor little boy who has nowhere to go and it's like super sad but has a lot of fantastic artistic moments and like just watch it OK and be kinder to people.TRAILER: https://youtu.be/DxmJ5Su5nGM

There's this guy and a girl at this super fancy schmancy hotel with a bunch of rich people and the guy is like hi lady I think we've met before and she's like I think you're mistaken and he's like I think we've met before and she's like I think you're mistaken and he's like I think we've met before and she's like I think you're mistaken and he's like I think we've met before and she's like I think you're mistaken and he's like I think we've met before and she's like I think you're mistaken and he's like I think we've met before and she's like I think you're mistaken and he's like I think we've met before and she's like I think you're mistaken.TRAILER: https://youtu.be/p3Tvl1Fuxt8

Oh sweet merciful Jesus WOW this movie goes totally ape-poop in the third act and it's about a group of characters who are all connected by money somehow and it mainly follows this poor poor father who just wants to live a happy life with his family but gets screwed over and then his whole life goes upside down and he does very bad things and like I don't want to give anything away but this is a movie essentially about how money is so freakin' annoying and it drives us crazy and mad and awful and how there's a dark side in every one of us like what Yoda says and ugh I hate using Star Wars references but it's true.TRAILER: https://youtu.be/zlYGbtJ9KnY

HOLY WOWWWW OK so this movie is positively insane and makes no sense but it's not supposed to and Salvador Dalí co-wrote it and we all know he was into surrealism which means this entire movie is like a twisted, crazy, scary, disturbing, hilarious dream/nightmare and there are motifs throughout and like there's a gross but really famous scene involving a razor and an eye but EEEEK don't get scared I swear it's a fast scene and just watch this movie because trust me it stays with you every image is extraordinary and it makes me want to work in an art museum.TRAILER: https://youtu.be/0dTwnzXzL5w

It's almost 13 hours long....that's all I have to say.TRAILER: https://youtu.be/CoLRNavAi_8

Wowwwww how do I explain/pronounce this movie well first of all it's pronounced like "sim-bee-oh-psycho-tax-eh-plasm" and it's so calming to say and say it 50 times really fast I dare you haha jk I mean no I mean yes OK so this is a very bizarre documentary where the director of the film films actors saying their lines in Central Park but he also plays a character himself and then he has other cameramen film him filming the actors and then the cameramen are filmed by other filmers filming them filming their film while being filmed by other filmers film film film film film....confused question mark well good because there is nothing else like movie symbiopsychotaxiplasm symbiopsychotaxiplasm symbiopsychotaxiplasm symbiopsychotaxiplasm symbiopsychotaxiplasm symbiopsychotaxiplasm symbiopsychotaxiplasm symbiopsychotaxiplasm.TRAILER: https://youtu.be/yn4rJLzv4Jk

OMG OK like don't ever mess with Al Pacino or Robert De Niro onscreen and off-screen because they are tough and scary but like so charismatic too and in this movie one of them is a thief and the other a cop and they form this weird relationship because the cop knows he will have to take him out sooner or later and the thief is OK with that and it's like a weird tragedy and Val Kilmer and Ashley Judd and Jon Voight and lil' Natalie Portman are also in it and Michael Mann wrote and directed it and it's mainly just a big epic movie about De Niro and his fellow thieves battling it out with the LAPD but it's like such a more realistic crime drama and I know it's long but long is good in this case.TRAILER: https://youtu.be/14oNcFxiVaQ

Podcaster Scrow Tim Tatopoulos joins me today for this super bizarre movie which is an alien sci-fi artsy erotic film and Scarlett Johansson plays this sexy alien in human skin who comes to Glasgow in this big car and picks up horny men and then traps them in this liquid where their skin is ripped off their bodies and there's a lot of loud sounds and music and creepy images and it's like a sad movie somehow but also moving in a twisted way and it's also fu**ing weird as f*ck and nightmarish and twisted and there's never been anything like it. TRAILER: https://youtu.be/J7bAZCOk0Sc

Luis Buñuel did this movie and it's Spanish and so surreal and bizarre and absurd and weird and there are a bunch of rich people having this dinner party and drinking a lot and some people are fooling around and then they suddenly are literally unable to leave the house and they go nuts and it's like why can't they just leave but the movie never tells you and there's a bear walking around and these sheep and a severed hand with a personality of its own like in The Addams Family and like wtf.TRAILER: https://youtu.be/ysYG7qaz29c

There's this guy living in Cuba and he's bourgeois and wants to be a writer but can't do it and his wife has just left him and the country and he is super negative and cynical about everyone in Cuba and narrates the entire film about how stupid and underdeveloped everyone is around him and he meets this teenager and they have this super uncomfortable relationship and she wants to be an actress and the movie combines narrative and real documentary footage and it's wild and like I don't even know every fact about the Cuban Revolution or the Pig of Bays or Bay of Pigs or whatever that incident was called and were there really pigs involved and Cuba is such a fun word to say.TRAILER: https://youtu.be/FGcBNmiCdxw

Oh me oh my OH ME OH MY wow this movie is B A N A N A S and it's like a dramatic thriller or a thriller drama and it's about a bunch of nuns who open this convent up on this huge mountain in the Himalayas and there's this handsome guy that two of the nuns kinda have the hots for but they know they shouldn't and then the nuns start to kinda spiral one by one and the movie is exquisitely shot and it's about sin and erotic desire and lascivious nuns and it's kinda campy but also really scary and deep and insane and totally crazy and like I don't want to give any of it away it's that nuts.TRAILER: https://youtu.be/CZRzcLK1Ar0

Oh boy OK so this is a very artsy abstract film which makes sense because Michelangelo Antonioni directed it and he loves everything abstract and Monica Vitti plays this very unhappy and depressed and lost wife whose husband works for a big petrochemical plant and then Richard Harris comes into the picture and he's the original Dumbledore and she's really depressed and lost and she's really depressed and lost and she's really depressed and lost and she's really depressed and lost and she's really depressed and lost and she's really depressed and lost.TRAILER: https://youtu.be/0uVPQG01JHk

So we all know that famous melody that is like "wooo woo wooo wooooo WAH WAH WAHHHH" but it's phonetically not like that because like I don't know how to spell it out but this is a spaghetti western which means the cowboys eat spaghetti no that was a bad joke this just means that it was a western directed by a European director and it's about these two guys out to retrieve this gold and it's set during the Civil War and there's a baddie named Angel Eyes and Clint Eastwood is in this too and he's the lead and he snarls like he always does and it's so badass and there are cool action sequences and epic music and Eastwood loves to shoot hats off people's heads so they don't get hurt and the cute old guy from The Holiday is also one of the leads and this is just a big epic western thriller and like what else can I say except for the premise is that there's gold...TRAILER: https://youtu.be/IFNUGzCOQoI

I say I want to eat this movie because it is so beautiful like every frame is like a piece of cake like literal cake preferably vanilla because I always have loved vanilla more than chocolate but sorry this is a movie by this super famous Indian director named Satyajit Ray and his name is so badass and it's about this bored and unhappy housewife whose husband is nice but like so blind to her pain and then his cousin comes to spend time with them and she starts to fall for him because they have a lot in common but they know they shouldn't but this isn't like one of those awwwww romantic triangles it's actually super sophisticated and intelligently written and breathtaking.TRAILER: https://youtu.be/WJBglRi-IhU

You know when you first like a person and you think they like you back and so you're like yayyyy but then they totally flake on you and you're like whyyy Godddd whyyyy well this movie is pretty much like that and it's very old-fashioned and black-and-white and follows this pretty and innocent young woman who falls head over freakin' heels with this older attractive French guy but he is like SO BLIND to her and keeps forgetting about her kinda like 50 First Dates but he's not amnesiac he's just very chauvinistic and can't remember her because he sleeps with women all the time and this is based on a book the end....TRAILER: https://youtu.be/lOtmlrHJfRU

So Alain Resnais directed this and he was this huge French New Wave director who made super artsy films and this one is like totally beautiful to look at and it's about this young attractive French woman working in Hiroshima after WWII and she has an affair with a married Japanese architect and they have a ton of sex and speak softly to one another and we learn more about her and like they seem fine but then there's a lot of baggage on her end and they speak more vaguely to each other and then they have more sex and.....yeah.TRAILER: https://youtu.be/CLts830aLlw

Oy vey oh Lord OK so Orson Welles directed and adapted this movie from a Pulitzer Prize-winning book and he's the dude who did Citizen Kane (1941) and I mean like that's CITIZEN FREAKIN' KANE so this one is very different but it still has its visual style and it's about this messy family in the 19th century and they're rich and the mother has a crush on this guy who embarrassed her when they were younger and her son is so whiny and obnoxious and is like "No, you can't have a crush on my mom" and "Stop it" and "Shoo!" and then his aunt is like "Yeah, and I love that guy too!" and like so everyone loves this man and he's obsessed with cars and Welles narrates the movie and I just...I just...I....I......this movie is so all over the place that now I have a headache.TRAILER: https://youtu.be/7W_ZBsxEBrA