KSTB- Kingdom of Stonetree Broadcasting

Arenthaer Gald

Kingdom of Stonetree Broadcasting is a radio station serving a fantasy kingdom called Stonetree. Here, you can hear samples of the programming they broadcast, whether it's ad breaks, news, or talk or informational programming. Direct any inquiries to arenthaergald@gmail.com. read less

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Kingdom of Stonetree Broadcasting Ads 1

Kingdom of Stonetree Broadcasting Ads 1

A typical commercial break on a radio station in a Fantasy Kingdom called Stonetree. You'll find out which carpet to buy, where to get swords, potions, or a job, and who to call if you get into legal trouble. Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com. Here's the script that was used to create this episode: Ad #1 Luxury Flying Carpet: The 1319 Alatar Gryphon (Classy low music) Announcer: Introducing the all new 1319 Alatar Gryphon- elevating the magic carpet from conveyance (pause) to artform. The Alatar Gryphon, woven from the finest silk and powered by premium spirits from the elemental plane of air, it provides an absolutely smooth ride through any night sky. Starting at just 1199 gold pieces per month and with 0 percent financing for the first 60 months, the question isn't can you afford the 1319 Alatar Gryphon, (pause) but can you afford to be seen flying anything else? Alatar Flying Carpets, made with enchantment. 1199 gold piece per month and 0 percent apr offer based on credit check, not compatible with some other offers, see participating rug merchant for details. Ad #2 Potion Shop- Seija's Alchemical Emporium 1: - and my elbow's been really bothering me, and I'm pretty sure I've contracted trollpox, and I think these aren't freckles, but a colony of micraoscopic skin pixies, and- 2: (Interspersed) Oh. Uh huh. 11aYeah. You know, if you're so worried about it, why don't we go into Seija's Alchemical Emporium over there? 1: I don't know, do you really think it would help? 2: Absolutely, Seija makes potions and remedies for all kinds of gnarly diseases and conditions. Let's go! (SFX) Shop Door Bell. Seija: Welcome to Seija's Alchemical Emporium, what can I help you with today? 1: Well, I've got troll pox, and skin pixies, and Shallbazzars's Disease

Episodes

Kingdom of Stonetree Broadcasting Ads 1

Kingdom of Stonetree Broadcasting Ads 1

A typical commercial break on a radio station in a Fantasy Kingdom called Stonetree. You'll find out which carpet to buy, where to get swords, potions, or a job, and who to call if you get into legal trouble. Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com. Here's the script that was used to create this episode: Ad #1 Luxury Flying Carpet: The 1319 Alatar Gryphon (Classy low music) Announcer: Introducing the all new 1319 Alatar Gryphon- elevating the magic carpet from conveyance (pause) to artform. The Alatar Gryphon, woven from the finest silk and powered by premium spirits from the elemental plane of air, it provides an absolutely smooth ride through any night sky. Starting at just 1199 gold pieces per month and with 0 percent financing for the first 60 months, the question isn't can you afford the 1319 Alatar Gryphon, (pause) but can you afford to be seen flying anything else? Alatar Flying Carpets, made with enchantment. 1199 gold piece per month and 0 percent apr offer based on credit check, not compatible with some other offers, see participating rug merchant for details. Ad #2 Potion Shop- Seija's Alchemical Emporium 1: - and my elbow's been really bothering me, and I'm pretty sure I've contracted trollpox, and I think these aren't freckles, but a colony of micraoscopic skin pixies, and- 2: (Interspersed) Oh. Uh huh. 11aYeah. You know, if you're so worried about it, why don't we go into Seija's Alchemical Emporium over there? 1: I don't know, do you really think it would help? 2: Absolutely, Seija makes potions and remedies for all kinds of gnarly diseases and conditions. Let's go! (SFX) Shop Door Bell. Seija: Welcome to Seija's Alchemical Emporium, what can I help you with today? 1: Well, I've got troll pox, and skin pixies, and Shallbazzars's Disease

Kingdom of Stonetree Broadcasting Ads 2

Kingdom of Stonetree Broadcasting Ads 2

A typical commercial break on a radio station in a Fantasy Kingdom called Stonetree. You'll find out which about historical tours you can take, what tests you should subject your romantic partners to, where to buy the best shoes, and which inn is recommended by a celebrity. There's also a Public Service Announcement from the Stonetree Association for Public Health. Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com.

A typical commercial break on a radio station in a Fantasy Kingdom called Stonetree. You'll learn about career opportunities for 10 year olds, what to eat in dungeons and caves, how to tell if your magic items are safe to use, where to get companionship (not like that), and the details for the hot ticket event of the season. Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com.

Kingdom of Stonetree Broadcasting Ads 4

Kingdom of Stonetree Broadcasting Ads 4

A typical commercial break on a radio station in a Fantasy Kingdom called Stonetree. You'll learn where to get lunch, about a hot business opportunity, what to do if your familiar seems sad, which supposedly hot business opportunities to avoid, and where to go to get your teeth cleaned. Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com.

A typical news break on a radio station in a Fantasy Kingdom called Stonetree. You'll learn what scams are going around, about educational opportunities for the whole family, and current events in local archaeology. Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com.

A typical commercial break on a radio station in a Fantasy Kingdom called Stonetree. You'll learn where to go to get that barbarian battlefield bod, or armor to cover it up, where you can leave your valuables, and who can help you move them, and about damages that you may be entitled to. Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com.

Foresight With Finola Vance

Foresight With Finola Vance

Get advice about the future from Finola Vance, instead of just the weather. In this episode a halfling is nervous about his upcoming wedding , a mysterious stranger wants advice on a non specific job, and a young person looks for career advice. Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com.

From The Casebooks Of Faustian D'Azoral

From The Casebooks Of Faustian D'Azoral

All your questions about Faustian D'Azoral answered! How does he work cases? What kinds of deals does he make? How does his dog smell? What is his shoe size? Wait... not that one. Some of your questions answered, in this adventure, From the casebooks of Faustian D'Azoral!

A typical commercial break on a radio station in a Fantasy Kingdom called Stonetree. You'll learn where to go for fine jewelry, about the plight of majestic (and tropical) animals, some of the dos and don'ts of making wishes, and what you need in the way of life insurance and home security. Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com.

Seija's Alchemical Tutorial

Seija's Alchemical Tutorial

It's time for something educational! You (yes you) (actually no, probably not you, but maybe someone) can learn how to prepare a couple of simple and useful magical potions. KSTB accepts no responsibility for the results and side effects of any potion you might prepare. Do not attempt without direct supervision from a qualified alchemist.

It's lunchtime in Stonetree, and everyone is getting all indecisive about where to eat. Luckily, KSTB has put together this handy guide on some of the tasty, or at least interesting, restaurant options available.

The Tome Of Titans

The Tome Of Titans

Arm yourself with knowledge before adventuring out into the wilds, by listening to The Tome of Titans! In this episode we encounter monsters that are legenday, bizzare, deadly, and surprising, in that order. Fair warning: things get loud.

A typical commercial break on a radio station in a Fantasy Kingdom called Stonetree. In this set of fantastical ads we learn what clothes to wear, where to get them cleaned, where we can get an education, and what to do if you get stabbed at home or need to go to the bathroom when traveling. Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com.

This is the second episode posted today, so make sure to check the earlier one! In honor of our year anniversary of sharing these snippets from an otherworldly radio station, here's a little something different: some of our early ads with all the parts switched around. Did you know we have a twitter, where you could, in theory, follow us for updates? We do! @arenthaer on twitter! And we also have a redbubble shop, if you wanted to wear our logo on a shirt or something! redbubble.com/people/arenthaer

Artifacts Roadshow

Artifacts Roadshow

Have you found treasure, and been like "Huh, I have no idea what this is, and no way of finding out?" Maybe you should try and get on an episode of Artifacts Roadshow, where our resident treasure expert will identify all your family heirlooms or stuff you've looted or stolen. It's probably not worth much though. Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com.

Foresight With Finola Vance 2

Foresight With Finola Vance 2

Get advice about the future from Finola Vance, instead of just the weather. This time, a young mother seeks an auspicious name for her child, a grifter tries to take the gamble out of gambling, and agoraphobic dwarf looks at his job prospects. Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com.

A typical news break on a radio station in a Fantasy Kingdom called Stonetree. Learn about new regulations on dangerous magical weapons, get some good reasons to be careful and cautious, and hear about a weird dream I had. Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com.

Verhaalgard Ventures - Caellach

Verhaalgard Ventures - Caellach

Stuck at home? Not the adventurous or traveling sort? Not to worry! KSTB is taking you along on journeys to destinations around Verhaalgard, starting with Caellach! We'll look at the famous college town through three lenses, food, art, and adventure! Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com.

Theobore the Barbarian has an Axe to Grind with: Bandits!

Theobore the Barbarian has an Axe to Grind with: Bandits!

Theobore Bloodaxe, most famous halfling barbarian on Verhaalgard, gets pretty angry about things. That's what makes him a barbarian. If you manage to set him off, look out! This week on KSTB we've got a sort of controlled detonation, since we sat down to talk to Theobore about what really pisses him off. Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com.

Don't Do Crimes

Don't Do Crimes

Thinking of committing a crime in Stonetree? Maybe think twice about that, or something like this could happen... to YOU! Listen to this hardened criminal describing the sort of thing that happens in the seedy underworld of our beloved fantasy kingdom. Direct any questions or comments to arenthaergald@gmail.com.