Parenting Decoded

Mary Eschen

This podcast will help all parents with kids of all ages to learn how to decode the mysteries and challenges of being a parent in today's challenging times. We will concentrate on practical parenting approaches that you as a parent can use right away! There are tips and tricks as well as plenty of real life stories to help you see that you can make a difference in your family's life in simple yet noticeable ways. In order for your kids to change, you need to change first! The ripple effect is real and lasting. Enjoy the ride! read less
Kids & FamilyKids & Family

Episodes

53 - Kids Who Don't Enjoy Learning: What To Do
Oct 13 2022
53 - Kids Who Don't Enjoy Learning: What To Do
When you have a child who refuses to read or is delayed in their reading compared to their peers it can be a very stressful time for parents as we try to navigate the what-to-dos and the why-is this-happening-to-my-child thoughts that constantly run through our minds.  The same stress can hit us when our kids don’t want to write and then again if they start falling into the “I hate school” mode which really tears us up.  Having learning differences can contribute heavily to this stressful time but knowing what to do and what resources you can employ in your home and in child’s school environment can make a huge difference.  This is why I’ve interviewed Dr. Victoria Waller on this podcast, to provide you with ideas for getting to those resources that your child needs. She’s recently released her book YES! Your Child Can: Creating Success for Children with Learning Differences in which she’s poured her 40 years of experience working with and studying learning differences in children.  It’s an invaluable resource and I want you to all know about it.  Take a listen to hear amazing ideas of how to creatively activate the passions of our kids to ignite their abilities to learn.  Also find out how to engage teachers and tutors to help leverage those passions to get your child onto a path of success. Here's a link to order the book:  YES!  Your Child CanIf you'd like to contact Dr. Waller:  WebsiteEmail me at mary@parentingdecoded.com or go to my website at www.parentingdecoded.com. Have a blessed rest of your day!
47 - Manners Lesson: "Please"
Apr 5 2022
47 - Manners Lesson: "Please"
This is the first podcast in a series relating to getting our kids to learn manners which are fundamental to their becoming responsible, respectful adults.  Starting with Life Lessons early has the biggest impact but in this series of podcasts, whether you have a toddler or a teen, it's worth investing in their future through manners.Here are the basics of what's covered in this podcast:1 - Start young!  The earlier the better.  Using "baby sign language" if you have a very little one.  2- With Older Kids Set Family Rules around Manners.  Use a Family Meeting to talk about how important manners and and that you're going to start with focusing on the use of "please" in your home. 3 - Practice!  It takes lots and lots of practice to get your kids to use please but you need to do it OVER and OVER again.  When they don't ask with a "please" just ask them again.  4 - Expect more from older kids.  Once they have the basics of using "please" have them incorporate "may I please" instead of just "please can I have".5 - Role Play!  Enjoy some of the learning with your kids by setting up fun events that you can practice and exaggerate what you're doing.  Maybe a special candlelit dinner once a month?  Maybe a Game Night where you exaggerate asking for dice or cards using "please".6 - Model What you Want.  You as the adult are constantly watched by your kids.  Make sure you're using "please" appropriately.7 - Leverage the Please Request.  Your kids WANT something from you.  Use this as "currency" that is so valuable to them that they're willing to use "please" to get it.  Follow through with it even if they're sassy.  Don't get distracted if they are snarky!TRANSCRIPT AVAILABLE HEREEmail Mary at mary@parentingdecoded.com. Sign up for Mary's newsletter at: NEWSLETTEREmail me at mary@parentingdecoded.com or go to my website at www.parentingdecoded.com. Have a blessed rest of your day!
46 - Unintended Consequences of Pushing for Good Grades
Mar 1 2022
46 - Unintended Consequences of Pushing for Good Grades
In this episode I interview Liz Bayardelle author of Clean Your Plate! 13 Things that Good Parents Say that Ruin Kids’ Lives.   This book covers all sorts of unintended consequences that good parents say regularly like Get Straight As, Don’t Hit, Sit Still, Don’t Be a Quitter and many more.   She goes into detail in all these areas and has wonderful ideas about how to combat our natural tendencies to push our kids in ways that might backfire.   We talk specifically about the impact of parents choosing to say GET STRAIGHT A'S often sends our kids looking for extrinsic motivators like money, extra computer time or other external rewards.  These rewards often work in the short run but can put a damper on intrinsic motivators that allow our children to own their own success.  In order for our kids to have their own internal motivations there are four key factors:Autonomy - this is where they "own" the ideas, doing things because they're invested in them and not doing them for other peopleCompetence - that kids believe they are capable of a skillRelatedness - kids are social and if they can see how what they are doing relates to other people they want to be with or emulate they can motivate themselves to push past the work at handPurpose - the task at hand relates to some other passion or goal they are trying to achieveBy encouraging a GROWTH MINDSET we can move away from nurturing kids who aren't fulfilling their potential to growing kids who WANT to achieve goals and move forward.  Get a copy of Liz's book here!CLEAN YOUR PLATE! 13 Things Good Parents Say That Ruin Kids' LivesAs always, email Mary at mary@parentingdecoded.com or join her Facebook Group: Parenting Decoded 2021 to hear from Mary more. Email me at mary@parentingdecoded.com or go to my website at www.parentingdecoded.com. Have a blessed rest of your day!