The Liquored Up Low Down: A Bizarre News Podcast

The Liquored Up Low Down

The most entertaining news stories aren't always on page one, and there's a good chance you missed the best of the best. The Liquored Up Low Down collects the finest obscure news stories, steeps them in alcohol, and passes them on to you, so you can stay informed and up to date on the most useless current events of the week.The cocktails are mixed and the Low Down is about to begin! read less
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Episodes

Death of a Fart Commander, Axes and Alcohol, and Rover the Alligator
Jun 16 2022
Death of a Fart Commander, Axes and Alcohol, and Rover the Alligator
Perhaps there really was an Israeli Mossad Commander whose name translates to "Made A Fart" and he got into military operations because high school was so terribly, terribly hard for him.https://www.jpost.com/middle-east/article-709031Axes! Coming to a bar near you!https://www.kiro7.com/news/local/state-votes-allow-axe-throwing-businesses-with-liquor-licenses/YKWBQXOD7FG3RLH2YXHFZUNW6Q/Be careful. My dog bites because my dog is an alligator.https://www.fieldandstream.com/survival/florida-man-bitten-alligator-mistook-dog/Does your auto insurance cover you for poor sexual decisions?https://www.npr.org/2022/06/10/1104134521/geico-lawsuit-std-hpv-insurance-carPenis Man. The voice of the people with very little to say.https://www.nydailynews.com/news/national/ny-arrested-arizona-penis-man-claims-there-are-more-penis-men-20200128-uet57r6egrhfhiaontvnllwv3m-story.htmlYou know there's a driving school out there somewhere that will teach you how to safely have sex in a moving vehicle.https://jalopnik.com/naked-florida-couple-crashes-into-fedex-truck-while-doi-1849023272If you have to rob ATMs, you're probably not a very successful rapper.https://nypost.com/2022/06/10/texas-rapper-ladesion-riley-arrested-for-robbing-atm-in-nashville/Contact Info:Hate-mail, questions or topic ideas for the show, hit us up on twitter at @LiquoredUpLD or email us at liquoreduplowdown@gmail.com. Bryan can be reached on twitter @RussianLitGuy.  Tom can be reached on twitter @Intelligiant2.Find more of Bryan at:https://thinkingoutcloud.org/Find Tom as Donnie Kruger at:https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC_oaVG9YC-lZ9Lao50t-hzw
Unsafe Babies, Mutant Rage Hamsters, and Bear Wrassling
Jun 7 2022
Unsafe Babies, Mutant Rage Hamsters, and Bear Wrassling
In this week's episode, learn about one practically perfect safety product for infants and toddlers, flawless with the exception of one small design flaw:https://www.pennlive.com/life/2022/05/federal-safety-agency-issues-warning-about-babyrescue-rapid-evacuation-devices.html#:~:text=Published%3A%20May.,the%20child%20inside%20the%20bag.%E2%80%9DAlready working on the cover art for Mutant Rage Hamsters 2: This Time It's Personal. Whatever happened to Mutant Rage Hamsters 1? Let's just skip it and get to the good stuff.https://metro.co.uk/2022/05/27/gene-editing-turns-fluffy-hamsters-into-aggressive-rage-monsters-16721041/In this corner: small weakling human with baseball cap on backwards with a body tempered by Fritos and charcoal grilled hot dogs. And in this corner: a 1700 pound grizzly bear who's pretty pissed that his natural environment is rapidly disappearing.Let's get ready to rumble!*interesting fact: my impression of an individual who thinks he can beat a grizzly bear in hand to hand combat sounds remarkably like Bill Cosby. https://www.fox13now.com/news/national-news/poll-shows-which-animals-americans-think-they-could-beat-in-a-fightDo you really want to live in a place that needs to pay you to live there?https://news.yahoo.com/this-virginia-town-will-give-you-a-20000-incentive-to-move-in-140532587.html#:~:text=Some%20cities%20like%20Lewisburg%2C%20W,to%20relocate%20with%20similar%20offers.I wonder if the brochures at the Bank of Zambia include any copies of the dick pics they send to ransomware gangs:https://www.bleepingcomputer.com/news/security/national-bank-hit-by-ransomware-trolls-hackers-with-dick-pics/Contact Info:Hate-mail, questions or topic ideas for the show, hit us up on twitter at @LiquoredUpLD or email us at liquoreduplowdown@gmail.com. Bryan can be reached on twitter @RussianLitGuy.  Tom can be reached on twitter @Intelligiant2.Find more of Bryan at:https://thinkingoutcloud.org/Find Tom as Donnie Kruger at:https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC_oaVG9YC-lZ9Lao50t-hzw
Killing People Can Be Fatal, Cheese Fraud Protection, and Bald C*nts
May 18 2022
Killing People Can Be Fatal, Cheese Fraud Protection, and Bald C*nts
In case you didn't know, killing people can be bad for you. The process of body disposal can be quite exerting, so be sure to check with your doctor and ensure you're healthy enough to bury someone before you murder. In other news, you'll be able to rest easy knowing your Parmesan cheese is legit. No more sleepless nights! And listen as we enjoy the freedom of being able to say the c word multiple times because it's the news and that automatically makes it okay.Our Linktree: https://linktr.ee/liquoreduplowdownThe drink: Margaritas.The Easily Winded Murderer:https://people.com/crime/man-dies-heart-attack-trying-bury-girlfriends-body-after-murdering-her/Cheese Tracking:https://www.foodandwine.com/news/parmigiano-reggiano-fraud-micro-transponder-rinds-digital-labelTribunal Determines the word Bald is Sexual Harassments But No Judgement on C%nt:https://www.theguardian.com/world/2022/may/13/calling-a-man-bald-is-sexual-harassment-employment-tribunal-rulesParents Sue for Grandchildren:https://www.npr.org/2022/05/14/1098958972/india-family-lawsuit-childrenWoman Gets Arrested for Bucket List:https://www.wfsb.com/2022/05/12/woman-says-getting-arrested-was-her-bucket-list-since-high-school-deputy-says/Plagiarism Article Removed for Plagiarism:https://abcnews.go.com/Entertainment/wireStory/authors-plagiarism-essay-pulled-plagiarism-found-84601217This Week in Duh:https://www.carscoops.com/2022/05/704000-ford-gt-heritage-ruined-because-florida-man-cant-drive-stick/Contact Info:Hate-mail, questions or topic ideas for the show, hit us up on twitter at @LiquoredUpLD or email us at liquoreduplowdown@gmail.com. Bryan can be reached on twitter @RussianLitGuy.  Tom can be reached on twitter @Intelligiant2.Find more of Bryan at:https://thinkingoutcloud.org/Find Tom as Donnie Kruger at:https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC_oaVG9YC-lZ9Lao50t-hzw
Open House Sexy Times, GPS + Alcohol + Stairs = Story, Florida Doesn't Like Poop or Butt Stuff on Vanity Plates, Inherit the Wind But With Cats
May 11 2022
Open House Sexy Times, GPS + Alcohol + Stairs = Story, Florida Doesn't Like Poop or Butt Stuff on Vanity Plates, Inherit the Wind But With Cats
First we talk about two Real Estate Agents who have some sexy times during an alleged Open House. Then we move on to a woman who drove down stairs because her GPS told her to. Florida does not like Farts or Butt stuff on the Vanity plates. We talk about Miska the cat who was a victim of government over-reach. Canada is the first to prosecute crimes . . . on the moon.Our Linktree: https://linktr.ee/liquoreduplowdownThe Drink:Scotch!News Stories from This Episode:Open House Sexy Times:https://therealdeal.com/tristate/2022/04/28/brown-harris-stevens-agents-sued-for-alleged-sex-capade-in-clients-home/GPS and Alcohol:https://www.miamiherald.com/news/nation-world/national/article260959062.htmlFlorida Vanity Plates that were rejected:https://www.tampabay.com/news/florida/2022/05/07/personalized-florida-license-plates-that-were-approved-and-rejected/Inherit the Wind but for Cats:https://www.seattletimes.com/seattle-news/eastside/miska-bellevues-most-persecuted-tabby-cat-seeks-her-day-in-court/Canada and Crimes on the Moon:https://www.npr.org/2022/05/02/1095861510/canadian-lawmakers-pass-amendment-allowing-prosecution-of-crimes-on-the-moonContact Info:Hate-mail, questions or topic ideas for the show, hit us up on twitter at @LiquoredUpLD or email us at liquoreduplowdown@gmail.com. Bryan can be reached on twitter @RussianLitGuy.  Tom can be reached on twitter @Intelligiant2.Find more of Bryan at:https://thinkingoutcloud.org/Find Tom as Donnie Kruger at:https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC_oaVG9YC-lZ9Lao50t-hzw
Drinking Your Own Pee is Good for You, Parent-Teacher Conferences with a Carnie, Buy Some Invisible Art, Fictosexual Software Development, Shocker: Electricity Can Kill You
May 3 2022
Drinking Your Own Pee is Good for You, Parent-Teacher Conferences with a Carnie, Buy Some Invisible Art, Fictosexual Software Development, Shocker: Electricity Can Kill You
We're drinking Martini's again, which succeeded in making Tom REALLY drunk. We first talk about a man who drinks his own pee. We then talk about the world's most terrifying teacher. An Art Collector buys a very expensive receipt from invisible art shows from the 50's. We did not know that "Fictosexuals" are really a thing. We close out the show with TWID: "Fractal Wood Burning" and its various dangers.Our Linktree: https://linktr.ee/liquoreduplowdownThe Drink:Gin Martinis!News Stories from This Episode:Drinking Your Own Pee is Good for You:https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/weird-news/man-says-drinking-your-urine-26824674The World's Most Terrifying Teacher:https://metro.co.uk/2020/09/28/teacher-loses-job-because-his-tattoos-and-black-eyes-scare-children-13339638/Art Collector Buys Receipt for Invisible Art:https://www.npr.org/2022/04/15/1093005984/in-paris-an-art-collector-paid-1-2-million-for-a-receipt Fictosexual Software Development:https://nypost.com/2022/04/26/fictosexual-man-married-hologram-bride-now-struggles-to-bond/This Week in Duh:https://abc7chicago.com/tiktok-fractal-wood-burning-art-wisconsin/11796197/Contact Info:Hate-mail, questions or topic ideas for the show, hit us up on twitter at @LiquoredUpLD or email us at liquoreduplowdown@gmail.com. Bryan can be reached on twitter @RussianLitGuy.  Tom can be reached on twitter @Intelligiant2.Find more of Bryan at:https://thinkingoutcloud.org/Find Tom as Donnie Kruger at:https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC_oaVG9YC-lZ9Lao50t-hzw
The Great Pit Toilet Rescue, Murder Novelist Goes on Trial for Murder, Blockbuster Part 2, The Sad Tale of Jerry Anus, A PSA About Nutrition Labels
Apr 26 2022
The Great Pit Toilet Rescue, Murder Novelist Goes on Trial for Murder, Blockbuster Part 2, The Sad Tale of Jerry Anus, A PSA About Nutrition Labels
We first talk about Pit Toilets and how your phone will just be replaced . . . they just give you a new one, right? A Romance Novelist who wrote an essay on how to kill your husband is going on trial for (allegedly) killing her husband. Bryan tells a story about Customer Service at Blockbuster while he was in college.  We then talk about an Anus that is not very smart about fake names. This Week in Duh is about dumb Americans not being able to read Nutrition Facts.Our Linktree: https://linktr.ee/liquoreduplowdownThe Drink:https://www.thepioneerwoman.com/food-cooking/recipes/a95933/new-years-cocktail-elderflower-and-orange/2/3 c. Orange Juice, Plus More For The Rims3 oz. fluid St. Germain Elderflower Liqueur2 oz. fluid Cointreau2 oz. fluid VodkaNews Stories from This Episode:The Great Pit Toilet Rescuehttps://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nation/2022/04/25/toilet-rescue-woman-phone-olympic-national-forest/7437231001/Romance Novelist Who Wrote "How to Murder Your Husband" Goes on Trial for Murdering Her Husbandhttps://www.cbsnews.com/news/nancy-crampton-brophy-novelist-trial-killing-daniel-murphy-oregon-culinary-institute/ Blockbuster Part 2:https://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/british-columbia/kelowna-blockbuster-2-1.6323347The Sad Hard Tale of Jerry Anus:https://www.guampdn.com/news/local/jerry-anus-charged-with-drug-possession-after-traffic-stop/article_b43e824b-cc6a-525a-b915-23b5354a73a2.htmlThis Week in Duhhttps://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-10722517/Only-9-Americans-properly-read-nutrition-label.htmlContact Info:Hate-mail, questions or topic ideas for the show, hit us up on twitter at @LiquoredUpLD or email us at liquoreduplowdown@gmail.com. Bryan can be reached on twitter @RussianLitGuy.  Tom can be reached on twitter @Intelligiant2.Find more of Bryan at:https://thinkingoutcloud.org/Find Tom as Donnie Kruger at:https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC_oaVG9YC-lZ9Lao50t-hzw
The Coffin Confessor A-Hole, The World's Biggest Trash Party, Take Cover Because John Hinckley Jr. is On Tour! What Kid Wouldn't Want to Go to Cementland?
Apr 19 2022
The Coffin Confessor A-Hole, The World's Biggest Trash Party, Take Cover Because John Hinckley Jr. is On Tour! What Kid Wouldn't Want to Go to Cementland?
First, we delve into the cottage industry of being a jerk at Funerals by speaking for the dead and telling the living things they may not know about the deceased. Next we tally up items from the most recent cleanup of Jersey Beaches and count up items from what could be the world's biggest party. Take cover because John Hinckley Jr. is on tour! Let's all go to Cementland and it's creepy aftermath. We talk about a man who has 9 wives . . . wait . . . 8 wives. Tom saves "This Week in Duh" by talking about the obvious fact that if Aliens attacked our lives would be changed forever. Our Linktree: https://linktr.ee/liquoreduplowdownThe Drink:The Monte Carlo:2 oz Rye Whiskey1 oz Benedictine2 Dashes of BittersNews Stories from This Episode:Coffin Confessions:https://www.abc.net.au/news/2020-09-02/coffin-confessor-bill-edgar-reveals-secrets-of-dead-at-funerals/12619946Jersey Beach Party:https://www.news4jax.com/news/weird-news/2022/03/30/braces-sex-pills-fake-eyeball-among-bizarre-nj-beach-trash/Take cover because John Hinckley Jr. is on tour!https://www.wsbtv.com/news/trending/john-hinckley-jr-would-be-reagan-assassin-play-sold-out-concert-new-york/EGA5BQPM5RCB5GECINWX6OM7PE/Cementland!https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/weird-news/inside-creepy-unfinished-theme-park-26688966Dude with 9 wives:https://www.indiatvnews.com/trending/news/brazil-model-who-celebrated-free-love-faces-divorce-from-1-of-his-9-wives-desires-to-get-married-twice-more-2022-04-06-768059Contact Info:Hate-mail, questions or topic ideas for the show, hit us up on twitter at @LiquoredUpLD or email us at liquoreduplowdown@gmail.com. Bryan can be reached on twitter @RussianLitGuy.  Tom can be reached on twitter @Intelligiant2.Find more of Bryan at:https://thinkingoutcloud.org/Find Tom as Donnie Kruger at:https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC_oaVG9YC-lZ9Lao50t-hzw
The OCD Hoarder, Threesome Sex Robots, The Canadian Racist, PSA: It's OK to Fart in Front of Your Boyfriend, Accidental Millions
Apr 13 2022
The OCD Hoarder, Threesome Sex Robots, The Canadian Racist, PSA: It's OK to Fart in Front of Your Boyfriend, Accidental Millions
We start with a hoarder who does a surprisingly good job of burying his mom and his sister. Did you know that most people would be OK with a sex robot as a third partner? There are racists in Canada, and they are not polite. One woman loses her Appendix because she didn't fart around her boyfriend for 2 years. And we close out with a woman who was body checked into pressing the "right" button to win $10 million.Our Linktree: https://linktr.ee/liquoreduplowdownThe Drink:The Ford: 2 oz Gin1 oz Dry Vermouth1/3 oz Benedictine2 Dashes Orange BittersNews Stories from This Episode:The OCD Hoarders:https://abcnews.go.com/US/wireStory/police-illinois-brothers-mother-sister-buried-yard-79679058Sex Robots and Threesomes:https://www.the-sun.com/lifestyle/5016582/sex-robot-survey-results-study-threesome/The Dumbest Racist Ever:https://www.yahoo.com/video/vancouver-woman-trial-anti-asian-175852488.htmlIt's OK to Fart in Front of Your Boyfirend:https://www.newsweek.com/woman-had-organ-removed-after-not-farting-front-boyfriend-years-1696522Woman Wins $10 Million after getting Body Checked into the "Right" Button:https://www.4029tv.com/article/california-woman-10-million-lottery-prize/39666610 Contact Info:Hate-mail, questions or topic ideas for the show, hit us up on twitter at @LiquoredUpLD or email us at liquoreduplowdown@gmail.com. Bryan can be reached on twitter @RussianLitGuy.  Tom can be reached on twitter @Intelligiant2.Find more of Bryan at:https://thinkingoutcloud.org/Find Tom as Donnie Kruger at:https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC_oaVG9YC-lZ9Lao50t-hzw
Do You Speak "Dog"? McBreatharianism. You Laundered Money How? A Racist Learns How Laws Work. (Bad) Parents on a Plane.
Apr 5 2022
Do You Speak "Dog"? McBreatharianism. You Laundered Money How? A Racist Learns How Laws Work. (Bad) Parents on a Plane.
Bryan tries to help Tom with his "barking dogs" problem. Did you know that McDonalds locations are part of a 5th Dimensional Plane of existence? Laundering money through Earth, Wind and Fire covers. A racist gets her comeuppance. "Here, you take care of my kids for me while I sleep." A construction worker drops poop from a crane and we ask "why?" for quite some time. Tom saves the day again with a "This Week in Huh?".Our Linktree: https://linktr.ee/liquoreduplowdownThe Drink:The Hearn (by The Dead Rabbit)News Stories from This Episode:Solve your dog barking problem:https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/weird-news/neighbour-furious-trick-stop-dog-26600841Breatharianism:https://nyulocal.com/cult-says-that-transcending-mortality-is-as-easy-as-eating-mcdonalds-everyday-and-breathing-ddfa7568b317Laundering Money through Earth, Wind, and Firehttps://www.lubbockonline.com/story/news/local/2022/03/25/former-san-angelo-police-chief-found-guilty-bribery-charges/7155552001/A Racist gets her comeuppance:https://www.westrivereagle.com/articles/rapid-city-hotels-threat-to-ban-native-americans-from-property-after-shooting-causes-outrage/Here. You take care of my kids for me on this plane:https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/weird-news/mum-mortified-after-husband-dumps-26604585Man fired after dropping his poop from a crane:https://www.ladbible.com/news/workman-fired-after-chucking-bag-of-his-s-from-a-crane-20220401This Week in . . . Huh?https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/31239862/Contact Info:Hate-mail, questions or topic ideas for the show, hit us up on twitter at @LiquoredUpLD or email us at liquoreduplowdown@gmail.com. Bryan can be reached on twitter @RussianLitGuy.  Tom can be reached on twitter @Intelligiant2.Find more of Bryan at:https://thinkingoutcloud.org/Find Tom as Donnie Kruger at:https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC_oaVG9YC-lZ9Lao50t-hzw
The Great Fajita Thief, Super Mario: Cruise Ship Edition, Ambassador Kid Rock, The Japanese Man Who Takes Your Burdens Away, "The Man" DJ's Lollapalooza
Mar 29 2022
The Great Fajita Thief, Super Mario: Cruise Ship Edition, Ambassador Kid Rock, The Japanese Man Who Takes Your Burdens Away, "The Man" DJ's Lollapalooza
We start with The Fajita Thief and talk about what's the Gentlemanly thing to do with $1.2M dollars of Fajitas. Bryan's met Super Mario: the man who jumps cruise ship to cruise ship. Ambassador Kid Rock (thankfully) refrains from telling DJT what do do about North Korea. We talk about a Japanese Man who is paid to be a silent companion for people but ponder what a toll this must take on him. Turns out the CEO of Goldman Sachs steals peoples hearts just as he steals their money as a DJ. And finally Bryan admits to his laziness in the form of not replacing the Kleenex box as we discuss the last story before This Week in Duh. We finally have an obvious enough story in This Week in Duh that Tom and Bryan are finally both on the same page!Our Linktree: https://linktr.ee/liquoreduplowdownThe Drink:Bryan's Easter Candy:3 oz Vodka1 oz Vanilla Liquer1oz KahluaNews Stories from This Episode:The Great Fajita Thief:https://www.abcactionnews.com/news/fajita-thief-sentenced-to-50-years-for-12m-theft-of-fajitas Super Mario: Cruise Ship Edition:https://jalopnik.com/this-man-has-lived-on-a-cruise-ship-for-20-years-1848623908Ambassador Kid Rock:https://www.theguardian.com/music/2022/mar/22/kid-rock-donald-trump-north-korea-islamic-stateThe Japanese Man Paid to Take on Other People's Burdens:https://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/japan-do-nothing-man-rent-pay-b2040364.htmlCEO Plays Lollapalooza:https://www.businessinsider.com/goldman-sachs-ceo-david-solomon-djs-lollapalooza-2022-3The Dirty Dishes Divorce:https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/weird-news/my-wife-divorced-leaving-dirty-26544748 This Week in Duh:https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2022/03/220324122533.htmContact Info:Hate-mail, questions or topic ideas for the show, hit us up on twitter at @LiquoredUpLD or email us at liquoreduplowdown@gmail.com. Bryan can be reached on twitter @RussianLitGuy.  Tom can be reached on twitter @Intelligiant2.Find more of Bryan at:https://thinkingoutcloud.org/Find Tom as Donnie Kruger at:https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC_oaVG9YC-lZ9Lao50t-hzw
Snakes in a Wine Bottle, The Pretentious Drink-Meat Experience, Police Will Validate Your Meth in Florida, The One True Ranch to Rule Them All, Printable Balls
Mar 22 2022
Snakes in a Wine Bottle, The Pretentious Drink-Meat Experience, Police Will Validate Your Meth in Florida, The One True Ranch to Rule Them All, Printable Balls
Did you know that snakes can go dormant for years and then bite a mother fucker? Tom brings you your food porn with a pretentious Italian Chef. We throw you some red meat: a Florida Man story about meth and dumbness. Hidden Valley Ranch gets into the jewelry business. They can print balls now! Towards the end of the episode we admit we will sell out and we beg for sponsors. Still waiting, Diageo. This week in Duh: If you bash the company you work for on Youtube, you will get fired!Our Linktree: https://linktr.ee/liquoreduplowdownThe Drink:Beer with a Scotch ChaserNews Stories from This Episode:Snakes in a Wine Bottle:https://whiskeyraiders.com/article/snake-wine-venomous-bite-china/The Pretentious Chef:https://www.ctvnews.ca/lifestyle/the-italian-chef-who-puts-lasagna-in-a-toothpaste-tube-1.5823252Florida Man Gets his Meth Checked by Police:https://metro.co.uk/2022/03/17/florida-man-calls-911-requesting-his-meth-be-tested-for-authenticity-16290169/The One True Ranch to Rule Them All:https://nerdist.com/article/hidden-valley-ranch-diamond-ring-sold-12-thousand-dollars-feeding-america-charity/Printable Balls:https://news.ubc.ca/2022/03/16/3d-printed-testicular-cells/Subway Bread is not Bread:https://www.theguardian.com/world/2020/oct/01/irish-court-rules-subway-bread-is-not-breadThis Week in Duh:https://arstechnica.com/tech-policy/2022/03/tesla-fires-employee-who-posted-youtube-videos-of-full-self-driving-accident/Contact Info:Hate-mail, questions or topic ideas for the show, hit us up on twitter at @LiquoredUpLD or email us at liquoreduplowdown@gmail.com. Bryan can be reached on twitter @RussianLitGuy.  Tom can be reached on twitter @Intelligiant2.Find more of Bryan at:https://thinkingoutcloud.org/Find Tom as Donnie Kruger at:https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC_oaVG9YC-lZ9Lao50t-hzw
The Bus Tour from Hell, The Golden (Cadbury) Egg, How Did That World War 2 Munition Get Up There?, Poutine is not Putin You Morons
Mar 15 2022
The Bus Tour from Hell, The Golden (Cadbury) Egg, How Did That World War 2 Munition Get Up There?, Poutine is not Putin You Morons
We start with a harrowing Bus Ride heading down to Robben Island. Fans of money and Cadbury Eggs will like the story about a man who gobbled down a rare Cadbury egg but didn't get the prize money. We then get into our first story about someone putting something up their ass and requiring Medical help (and it probably won't be the last). Our fourth story is a follow up story about contraband Bologna. Chicken SVU: India settles a crime about 63 dead chickens. Our last official story is about a hand=held robot that will make you feel better when your bf/gf breaks up with you. Our "This Week in Duh" covers dumb-asses who don't know what Poutine is and jump tp some very bad conclusions.Our Linktree: https://linktr.ee/liquoreduplowdownThe Drink:The Classic Margarita:2 oz Tequila1 oz Triple Sec1 oz Lime JuiceNews Stories from This Episode:Robben Island Hell:https://www.dailyvoice.co.za/news/robben-island-hell-elderly-group-injured-in-tour-bus-0005ac14-1792-43c8-bed7-96f7109b387bThe Cadbury Egg Tragedy:https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/weird-news/man-defeated-after-unknowingly-scoffing-26437208The WW2 Munitions Up Someone's Ass Tragedy:https://www.jpost.com/breaking-news/bomb-disposal-team-called-when-uk-man-turns-up-at-hospital-with-wwii-munition-in-his-backside-687944Nothing Funny About Contraband Bologna (Oh really?):https://www.abqjournal.com/2477306/border-patrol-nothing-funny-about-bologna-smuggling.html63 Chickens Killed by Loud Wedding:https://newsinfo.inquirer.net/1519619/wedding-music-blamed-for-fate-of-63-chickensOMOY the consoling robot:https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2022/03/220310100010.htm#:~:text=The%20mediator%20robot%20was%20designed,Can%20you%20wait%20another%20hour%3F%22This Week in (Poutine) Duh:https://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/food-and-drink/poutine-paris-restaurant-putin-russia-b2029991.htmlContact Info:Hate-mail, questions or topic ideas for the show, hit us up on twitter at @LiquoredUpLD or email us at liquoreduplowdown@gmail.com. Bryan can be reached on twitter @RussianLitGuy.  Tom can be reached on twitter @Intelligiant2.Find more of Bryan at:https://thinkingoutcloud.org/Find Tom as Donnie Kruger at:https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC_oaVG9YC-lZ9Lao50t-hzw
The Hipster Irony, Be a Bear Whisperer, The Dog Food Vegetarian Experiment, Can You Call Dibs on Baby Names?, TSA Comfort Chainsaw
Mar 8 2022
The Hipster Irony, Be a Bear Whisperer, The Dog Food Vegetarian Experiment, Can You Call Dibs on Baby Names?, TSA Comfort Chainsaw
This week we try to find a job for Tom. A man thought a picture of a hipster was a stolen image of him, but it wasn't (the irony!). There is a job opening in Montana as a Bear Whisperer. A dog food company is paying people to sniff their own dog's poop. We discuss whether one can call dibs on baby names (spoiler alert: no, one can't). A St. Louis man tried to photocopy his butt in a crowded lobby because he thought it would be a good joke for his girlfriend. Our last official article is about the yearly top 10 list of confiscated items by the TSA. And finally, this week in duh includes a brewery that is making Molotov Cocktails in the Ukraine.Our Linktree: https://linktr.ee/liquoreduplowdownThe Drink:The Classic Margarita:2 oz Tequila1 oz Triple Sec1 oz Lime JuiceNews Stories from This Episode:The Hipster Effect:https://www.cbc.ca/radio/asithappens/as-it-happens-thursday-edition-1.5046925/man-angry-his-photo-was-used-to-prove-all-hipsters-look-alike-then-learns-it-wasn-t-him-1.5046933The Bear Whisperer:https://slate.com/technology/2022/03/what-does-it-take-to-be-a-grizzly-conflict-manager.htmlDog Poop Sniffing:https://www.irvinetimes.com/news/19972153.vegan-dog-food-company-offering-5-000-sniff-dogs-poo/You Can't Call Dibs on Baby Names:https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/weird-news/woman-perplexed-friend-calls-dibs-26323915The St. Louis Butt Copier Guy:https://www.newspapers.com/clip/32267770/jan-13-2001-photocopy-of-butt/TSA Top 10:https://www.travelandleisure.com/travel-news/tsa-most-confiscated-items-2021This Week in Duh:https://ktla.com/news/nationworld/ukrainian-brewery-reportedly-making-molotov-cocktails-to-help-defend-city-against-russia/Contact Info:Hate-mail, questions or topic ideas for the show, hit us up on twitter at @LiquoredUpLD or email us at liquoreduplowdown@gmail.com. Bryan can be reached on twitter @RussianLitGuy.  Tom can be reached on twitter @Intelligiant2.Find more of Bryan at:https://thinkingoutcloud.org/Find Tom as Donnie Kruger at:https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC_oaVG9YC-lZ9Lao50t-hzw
One Word Sends People to Hell, "I am Here for the Interview . . . . Cool Tip Jar", Here's My Application and My Period Tracker, She Will Not Be Ignored
Mar 1 2022
One Word Sends People to Hell, "I am Here for the Interview . . . . Cool Tip Jar", Here's My Application and My Period Tracker, She Will Not Be Ignored
Did you know that using the wrong incantation as a Priest can make people go to Hell? "I am here for the interview . . . . cool tip jar." Our 3rd story is about attaching the wrong thing to your job application. Fatal attraction out there in Wyoming, PA. What would you change your name to, if you had the chance? Marie Unicorn Sparkles maybe? We also talk about another cool Valentine's Day gift. And finally, we educate you on the fact that drinking booze does not cure COVID.Our Linktree: https://linktr.ee/liquoreduplowdownThe Drink:2 oz Gin1oz Creme de MentheNews Stories from This Episode:The Polyglot Pastor:https://www.nytimes.com/2022/02/14/us/catholic-priest-baptisms-phoenix.htmlTaking the Tip Jar:https://www.audacy.com/thebull/news/man-steals-tip-jar-from-pizza-shop-where-he-applied-for-workThe Period Tracker Application:https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/weird-news/woman-mortified-after-figuring-out-26012927I Will Not be Ignored:https://www.mynbc5.com/article/cops-woman-smashed-her-way-into-police-station-looking-for-officer-she-wanted-to-date/25842229Marie Unicorn Sparkles:https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/weird-news/mum-changes-name-unicorn-sparkles-26257361Naming Zoo Cockroaches for Valentine's Day:https://www.npr.org/2022/02/12/1080142361/valentines-day-roach-zoo-nameThis Week in Duh:https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/factcheck/2020/03/20/fact-check-drinking-alcohol-wont-reduce-coronavirus-risk/2881704001/Contact Info:Hate-mail, questions or topic ideas for the show, hit us up on twitter at @LiquoredUpLD or email us at liquoreduplowdown@gmail.com. Bryan can be reached on twitter @RussianLitGuy.  Tom can be reached on twitter @Intelligiant2.Find more of Bryan at:https://thinkingoutcloud.org/Find Tom as Donnie Kruger at:https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC_oaVG9YC-lZ9Lao50t-hzw
Frîtes . . . By Idaho, The Tesla Tussle, The Sorcerer and the Nail, Yes He's the A-hole, Kid Goes Back to Cali to Buy a Lamborghini with $3
Feb 15 2022
Frîtes . . . By Idaho, The Tesla Tussle, The Sorcerer and the Nail, Yes He's the A-hole, Kid Goes Back to Cali to Buy a Lamborghini with $3
Looking for a great Valentine's Day gift? Try the latest perfume . . . Frîtes . . . By Idaho. Did you know that Tesla's don't drive themselves? In the year 2022, someone uses the word "Sorcerer" in a Press Conference non-ironically. Husband upgrades to Business Class without his wife and Social Media is not a fan. A 5-year old kid attempts to drive to California to buy a Lamborghini.  Security Guard becomes an artist on his first day at work. And with "This Week in Duh" Tom learns why snow melts faster on the south side of your house.Our Linktree: https://linktr.ee/liquoreduplowdownThe Drink:The Gimlet:2 1/2 oz Gin1/2 oz Lime Juice1/2 oz Simple SyrupNews Stories from This Episode:Frîtes . . . By Idahohttps://www.npr.org/2022/02/13/1080493253/valentines-day-idaho-potato-french-fry-perfumeTesla Autopilot is not Autopilot:https://www.newsweek.com/tesla-autopilot-crashes-police-car-hits-cop-driver-watches-movie-1677814The Sorcerer and the Nailhttps://www.newsweek.com/sorcerer-hammered-nail-pregnant-womans-head-guarantee-son-1677664Yes, He's the Assholehttps://www.mirror.co.uk/news/weird-news/man-blasted-after-being-upgraded-26199298A 5-year-old Goes to Great Lengths for a Lamborghinihttps://www.washingtonpost.com/lifestyle/2020/05/11/boy-5-steals-family-car-attempt-buy-lamborghini-then-man-with-lamborghini-shows-up-his-house/The Ballpoint Pen Artist Security Guard https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/weird-news/bored-security-guard-allegedly-ruined-26184374This Week in Duh:https://kdvr.com/weather/why-snow-melts-faster-in-front-of-south-facing-houses/Contact Info:Hate-mail, questions or topic ideas for the show, hit us up on twitter at @LiquoredUpLD or email us at liquoreduplowdown@gmail.com. Bryan can be reached on twitter @RussianLitGuy.  Tom can be reached on twitter @Intelligiant2.Find more of Bryan at:https://thinkingoutcloud.org/Find Tom as Donnie Kruger at:https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC_oaVG9YC-lZ9Lao50t-hzw
Dogs as Zombie Detection, Meat Vending Machines, Sicario Bologna, The Pretentious Gold Cube Artist, Showdown at the Golden Corral
Feb 8 2022
Dogs as Zombie Detection, Meat Vending Machines, Sicario Bologna, The Pretentious Gold Cube Artist, Showdown at the Golden Corral
Our accidental theme this week is Dogs and Meats. Our first story includes an "expert" on dogs' olfactory senses and their ability to sniff out zombies. Our second story is about meat-based vending machines in Germany and Singapore (thanks, COVID!). Then, we continue with a story about contraband bologna brought into the US from Mexico. Tom discloses another art story. This time it's about a very pretentious artist who believes highly in the magic of . . . gold. We then detour and talk about what profession Tom will take up during the apocalypse. We meet a "Mother of the Year" who told her kids to stay in the basement and "Just eat candy," while she vacationed in Florida.  Our last story involves a showdown over steak at The Golden Corral. This week in Duh includes crime and Florida.Our Linktree: https://linktr.ee/liquoreduplowdownThe Drink:The Gimlet:2 1/2 oz Gin1/2 oz Lime Juice1/2 oz Simple SyrupNews Stories from This Episode:Dogs and Zombies:https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/weird-news/dogs-will-know-apocalypse-coming-26121501German Meat Vending Machines:https://www.mentalfloss.com/article/653074/sausage-vending-machines-germany#:~:text=The%20sausage%20vending%20machines%20are,of%202020%2C%20according%20to%20NPR.243 Pounds of Bologna Seized at the US-Mexico Border:https://dfw.cbslocal.com/2022/01/31/243-pounds-of-contraband-bologna-seized-at-texas-mexico-border/The Pretentious Gold Cube Artist:https://www.ndtv.com/offbeat/why-a-gold-cube-worth-11-7-million-appeared-in-new-yorks-central-park-2748754"Just Eat Candy" Mother of the YearShowdown at the Golden Corral:https://www.today.com/food/news/golden-corral-fight-rcna14500This Week in "Duh": Too much crime reported in Florida means Facebook Page gets shut down:https://www.clickorlando.com/news/weird-news/2022/01/27/florida-sheriff-halts-facebook-comments-because-too-many-crimes-reported/Contact Info:Hate-mail, questions or topic ideas for the show, hit us up on twitter at @LiquoredUpLD or email us at liquoreduplowdown@gmail.com. Bryan can be reached on twitter @RussianLitGuy.  Tom can be reached on twitter @Intelligiant2.Find more of Bryan at:https://thinkingoutcloud.org/Find Tom as Donnie Kruger at:https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC_oaVG9YC-lZ9Lao50t-hzw
Certified Haunted Dolls, How Not to Adopt a Baby, Batman Steals from a Church, Garden Torches as Snow Removal, Irish Fisherman Don't F Around
Feb 3 2022
Certified Haunted Dolls, How Not to Adopt a Baby, Batman Steals from a Church, Garden Torches as Snow Removal, Irish Fisherman Don't F Around
It turns out all those horror movies about haunted dolls are real. Buying a baby from a stranger is not really the way to go, especially at a Wal Mart. Did you know that some churches have Batman suits? Garden Torches are not good for clearing snow, but are great for burning down your house! Who's tougher, the Irish, or the Russians? We find out this episode.  We discuss the phenomenon of people dying by Selfie. And we close out by talking about why Pandas are fat. Enjoy!Our Linktree: https://linktr.ee/liquoreduplowdownThe Drink:SCOTCH!News Stories from This Episode:Get yourself a haunted Doll:https://www.dailydot.com/irl/haunted-doll-collecting/Woman Tries to Buy a Baby:https://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/texas-woman-arrested-allegedly-trying-buy-another-womans-child-500000-rcna13282Batman Goes to Church:https://www.wspa.com/news/batman-burglar-robs-church-overnight/Man Uses Garden Torch to Clear Snowhttps://www.wtnh.com/news/connecticut/new-haven/homeowner-tries-melting-snow-with-flame-thrower-sets-home-on-fire/Ireland v Russia:https://www.cnn.com/2022/01/31/europe/ireland-fishermen-russia-navy-intl/index.htmlTaking a Selfieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!https://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/hiker-falls-nearly-700-feet-death-attempting-selfie-arizona-state-park-rcna13858This Week in Duh: Why Pandas are Fat:https://news.sky.com/story/revealed-study-finds-how-pandas-gain-weight-on-a-bamboo-diet-12519252Contact Info:Hate-mail, questions or topic ideas for the show, hit us up on twitter at @LiquoredUpLD or email us at liquoreduplowdown@gmail.com. Bryan can be reached on twitter @RussianLitGuy.  Tom can be reached on twitter @Intelligiant2.Find more of Bryan at:https://thinkingoutcloud.org/Find Tom as Donnie Kruger at:https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC_oaVG9YC-lZ9Lao50t-hzw
The Sex Doll Divorcé, The Alcatraz Guys Overcomplicated Things, You Must Be This Tall To Be A Hero, LAPD = "LA, Pokémon Department"
Jan 25 2022
The Sex Doll Divorcé, The Alcatraz Guys Overcomplicated Things, You Must Be This Tall To Be A Hero, LAPD = "LA, Pokémon Department"
This week we discuss the fate of Margo, the Divorced Sex Doll and what she's missing from Yuri, her very flamboyant ex. A dog that can ride the train is framed for pooping there for Political reasons, apparently. Did you know that just saying you are getting out of jail is an escape plan? An Oklahoma Kid saves two lives in one day and Bryan gets jealous because he's only saved one life. Los Angeles, PD: as in "Pokémon Department".  A man gets away with calling out sick from work while Bryan and Tom try to recreate his accent. And finally This Week in Duh finds us  talking about why masks are sexy.Our Linktree: https://linktr.ee/liquoreduplowdownThe Drink:The Manhattan:2 oz Rye Bourbon Whiskey1 oz Sweet Vermouth1 Dash Angostura Bitters1 Maraschino Cherry (Garnish)News Stories from This Episode:Poly Man Who Divorced his Sex Doll:https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/weird-news/man-who-found-love-ashtray-25971031Dog is Framed for Pooping:https://www.hurriyetdailynews.com/istanbuls-local-dog-framed-over-poop-on-train-169527Inmate Pretends to be Getting Out of Prison and Escapes:https://www.kansascity.com/news/state/missouri/article257305572.htmlKid Saves Two Lives in One Day:https://www.thedenverchannel.com/news/national/oklahoma-child-hailed-a-hero-after-saving-2-people-on-same-dayLos Angeles Pokémon Department:https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2022/jan/11/lapd-officers-pokemon-go-robbery-firedNo Socks = No Work:https://www.timesnownews.com/the-buzz/article/man-tells-boss-he-cant-come-into-work-as-he-doesnt-have-any-clean-socks/827689 This Week in Duh:Face Masks Make People More Attractive:https://www.theguardian.com/world/2022/jan/13/face-masks-make-people-look-more-attractive-study-findsContact Info:Hate-mail, questions or topic ideas for the show, hit us up on twitter at @LiquoredUpLD or email us at liquoreduplowdown@gmail.com. Bryan can be reached on twitter @RussianLitGuy.  Tom can be reached on twitter @Intelligiant2.Find more of Bryan at:https://thinkingoutcloud.org/Find Tom as Donnie Kruger at:https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC_oaVG9YC-lZ9Lao50t-hzw
The Fart Jar Con, Earth Gets a Black Box, The Lickable TV, Hamsters are Boozehounds, and Bryan Owes Humanity a Baby
Jan 18 2022
The Fart Jar Con, Earth Gets a Black Box, The Lickable TV, Hamsters are Boozehounds, and Bryan Owes Humanity a Baby
This episode is packed with the most serious of topics: everything from science to dystopia to farts. We start with an in-depth discussion of fart jar science and connoisseurship. We then learn that the Earth is getting a Black Box (like in planes!) and we quote Carl Sagan. Do we really need a lickable TV? Bryan's not buying one anytime soon. There is more speculation about biological life on Venus and we quote Carl Sagan again. Tom gets very excited about Hamsters being able to drink. The Pope says "Have Kids not Pets" and Bryan has a lot to say about that. And we close out with dumb people's obsession with celebrity.Our Linktree: https://linktr.ee/liquoreduplowdownThe Drink:Tom:1 Splash LimoncelloLots of GinBryan:Line a Martini Glass with Dry VermouthLots of GinNews Stories from This Episode:The Big Fart Jar Con:https://www.insider.com/reality-star-made-200k-fart-jars-selling-them-as-nfts-2022-1A Black Box for the Earth:https://www.livescience.com/earth-black-box-records-planet-demiseThe Lickable TV:https://www.reuters.com/technology/lick-it-up-japan-professor-creates-tele-taste-tv-screen-2021-12-23/Roald Dahl:https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Roald_DahlLife on Venus?https://www.reuters.com/technology/lick-it-up-japan-professor-creates-tele-taste-tv-screen-2021-12-23/The Kids in the Hall Alien Probe Skit:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6tZar4wRP40&t=3sHamsters are Booze Hounds:https://www.theatlantic.com/science/archive/2021/12/alcohol-consumption-hamster-drunk/621125/Pope Says You Should Have Kids, Not Pets:https://www.theguardian.com/world/2022/jan/05/pope-couples-choose-pets-children-selfishAnd yes, Bryan realizes that he mispronounced "Dostoevsky".This Week in Duh:https://certifiedintel.com/2022/01/new-study-finds-people-who-are-obsessed-with-celebrities-to-be-less-intelligent/Contact Info:Hate-mail, questions or topic ideas for the show, hit us up on twitter at @LiquoredUpLD or email us at liquoreduplowdown@gmail.com. Bryan can be reached on twitter @RussianLitGuy.  Tom can be reached on twitter @Intelligiant2.Find more of Bryan at:https://thinkingoutcloud.org/Find Tom as Donnie Kruger at:https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC_oaVG9YC-lZ9Lao50t-hzw