(January 7, 2023) Join us for a catch-up on hockey Christmas, WJC roundup, and SO. MUCH. MORE. (No really, this is kind of a long one!)   Links & More:  Bruins Christmas suitsHurricanes menorahQU Women’s Hockey Jingle Bell Rock Jack Quinn and JJ Peterka holiday shopping; Opening the gifts Santagovich, Swaynta, and Marcus PetterssonNo NYC rivalry for ChristmasCale Makar calls off penaltyWinter Classic: Mic’d up goalieCharlie MacAvoy family funFan loses ice cream - Pacioretty to the rescueJacqueline Kane asks the tough questionsJack Hughes visits Hockey In New Jersey Oilers Skills: Ruff-Ruff RelayMittelstadt does Home Alone, Columbus editionRyder Getzlaf, team reporterMinnesota Wild wake up call Alex Ovechkin and the Habs momsCam Talbot's Deadpool mask; Ryan Reynolds' responseEddie Lack’s dad is just as savageParis HiltonMorgan Frost vs the CoyotesBedard… tickling? Shane Wright scores on… Ben Gaudreau?On ice camera guy’s biggest fan Suchanek.  Bedard OT winner described; Heartbreaker. Darels Dukurs mom is the MVP. Czechs swimming in Halifax. Red Savage & Kaidan Mbereko Bedard doesn’t care about MVP Gavin Brindley and Seamus CaseyKevin Hayes is an All Star. Milan Lucic. Do it for the daughters. Credits Hosts: Iris, Jess, and Puff Producer/Engineer: Jess Music: "Mulholland" - King Canyon

(December 19, 2022) New year, new episode! We're here with your World Juniors preview, (more) Ryan Reynolds Sens talk, and so much more!   Links & More:  Ovi gets 800! Locker room celly. Hawks congratulate him. Ovi’s jobHyman hatty! Pucks pic outtakes The Chabot-Hamonic apology giftsDan Vladar mic’d up. He’s on a missionErik Gustafsson hat trick Marchenko first NHL goalGood boy Nick Blankenburg recovering well Slafkovsky and Xhekaj Christmas outfit Found the Grinch! Kuznetsov & SamsonovKostin vs MathesonRyan Reynolds will become “frothy, rabies-infused” Sens fanChinny practices EnglishGiana Han, the Mullett arena experienceCarrying Catan, the update Mama Slafkovsky says shoot more Morgan Geekie Twitter Q&A Have you been scored on by Ovechkin? Eddie Lack has. Brotherly puppy love Carter Hart forgiven for waking up Laughton  Jake Allen is hot and horny. Don’t worry his wife knowsThose are some goals, Darcy KuemperSanta by GucciIt’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas at the Beniers/Borgen homeBoth Kessels scoring at the same timeBedard & Fantilli draft rivalry i have no issues with himwright-bedard combination we don’t bicker “canada’s pitbull” Fantilli profile; mix of mackinnon, bergeron, and bennbeware of housekeeping WJC Canada leadership; shane talks captaincyrutger mcgroarty mic’d up; lightning round WJC US leadership  Credits Hosts: Iris, Jess, and Puff Producer/Engineer: Jess Music: "Mulholland" - King Canyon

(December 10, 2022) Your holiday episode minus holiday content (basically). Join us for Shane Wright's first NHL goal, rookie Catan responsibilities, and genuine concern that we might be hearing from Cole Caufield's legal team (this is a joke, we swear).    Links & More:  Coach LT picks his shootersZucker vs BinningtonStamkos talks stick stealingOilers Indigenous Celebration NightShane Wrights scores first goal against HabsJeff Skinner new goal songJack Hughes has staminaLeon Draisaitl: pest eraIsaiah Meyer-Crothers and Wayne SimmondsJohnathan Kovacevic finishes his civil engineering degreeLife - and gear - of a traveling goalieZ stands for Zeus, right Mitch? Miles Wood goes retro. And then goes up in flamesMoney for charity in Jack Edwards' name; Gritty response Brandon Wheat Kings to the rescueLaughton and JVR Flyers Pride initiative Guhle returns to EdmontonFlyers Zachary Wertz contractElvis might not have more childrenBruins hockey candle seasonXhekaj’s mustache tweet thread. Ending with a reminder to donate Cole Caufield’s goal songDan Vladar’s fiancee lost a betSeverson comes for some village idiotsWhen are Mickey and Goofy entering the Avs lineup?Preds are in mourning. Josi’s statementCarrying Catan: a thread The wingmen game: Kreider & ZibanejadDurzi got booed harder than Marchand. Brad knows whyHank Green vs Matthew TkachukTurcotte’s first goal. Or is it Tur-hottie?MPP Canadian athlete of the yearBU Hockey plays a 6-9 game Credits Hosts: Iris, Jess, and Puff Producer/Engineer: Jess Music: "Deck The Halls" - DJ Williams

(November 27, 2022) This time we are all over the board talking about everything from the Devils admin reveal to Mount Bruin to the NHL partnering with the Trevor Project and so much more. Buckle in because this one's a long one. Time truly does fly when you're having fun!   Links & More: Bruins retros vs Canucks whitesBergeron checking on Tage Thompson’s wifeRoberto LuongoWhen goalies act as a net-front screen, Kraken editionTippett faceoff goalEvgeni Malkin 1000th game warmups. legacy articleJack Hughes HattyKirby Dach shootout winner against his old team, taunts the crowd. Strictly businessPetty Cale MakarWhy no one could get a hold of BerggerenTorts in-game interview: we suckPhil Kessel drip for 1000th consecutive gameBlackhawks Two Puck saga: Athanasiou violates the spirit of the game. It’s under review. The rulingTarasov and Bobrovsky: the goalie connection Nick Suzuki vs Vegas? Kent Johnson and Jake Christiansen friendship tourErik Haula chicken finger on the iceAnthony Stolarz - not hot sauce?The Hank Green saga: How it started. How Ratthew got involved. Hank’s definition of goalie interference. How the NHL account got involved. Hank’s hockey opinionsSlafkovsky stats changed - turning into Cole?NJ Devils admin reveal Henry Staal was inspired by Flyers vs Beau HayesCanadiens win the weirdest questionMount Bruin Penguins nearly get goalied by Dan Vladar AKA This GuyKuzmenko gets itCale Makar fastest defenseman in NHL history to 200 pointsJake Sanderson first Montana-born skater to score in the NHL. Connor Bedard is selling out arenas. Because he does this. And this. His first 100 games in the WHL Bordeleau natty hatty Golden stick for Hilary.  Record-breaking attendance   Credits Hosts: Iris, Jess, and Puff Producer/Engineer: Jess Music: "Boom Bap Flick" - Quincas Moreira

(November 13, 2022) From team dads Claude Giroux and Nick Foligno to daddy sharks Erik Karlsson, James Reimer, and Jaycob Megna. We (finally) wrap up hockey Halloween and bring you the best goals (and no goals) of the past two weeks and so much more.   Links & More 2:55       Deadpool for Sens owner? Ryan on Jimmy Fallon. AT THE GAME 5:57       Claude Giroux goal from center ice7:43       Claude Giroux kicks Hartsy’s stick back to him8:02       Cam York says: alright, that’s that8:46       Claude Grioux’s return to Philly. mic’d up 9:40       Ullmark on Swayman. Foligno is a good substitute11:27      Jamie Benn betrays Hyman’s friendship 15:15      Erik Karlsson hatty16:00     Jack Eichel hatty. Return to Buffalo22:34     Jakub Lauko first NHL goal25:24     You mess with Wi-Fi’s bestie? Wi-Fi messes with you28:24     Don’t worry Trevor, it counts to us29:02     Jesper Wallstedt (Iowa Wild) goalie goal 29:58     Entry in the broken blade competition32:23     Shane Pinto: rookie of the month; Shane Pinto fan club35:16     Blankenburg's quote is almost better than the goal38:15     Shaving Casey for Hockey Fights Cancer39:48    Gallagher and Caufield41:52     Bo Byram commits murder44:15     Sorry Lindy (Ruff) 44:56    Borje Salming night47:44    Dia de los muertos; Filipino heritage48:55    COOPERALLS50:19     Chris Kreider wins Halloween51:41     Sharks Halloween: Erik Karlsson; James Reimer52:36    Erik Karlsson and Jaycob Megna do ballet with their daughters53:56    Anaheim Ducks and the Mighty Ducks55:05    NHL career day TikTok; Rasmus Dahlin wasn’t lying56:42    Pasta worried about style rankings during Movember57:30    Bo Horvat will pay you back58:12    Coach Lil Jon says turn down for WHAT59:32    Linus Ullmark undefeated even when getting pulled1:00:16  Nick Blankenblog1:01:18  Picky eater Johnny Hockey1:01:49  Frankie plane prank1:04:27  Games we’re looking forward to Credits Hosts: Iris, Jess, and Puff Producer/Engineer: Jess Music: "Who Do You Think You Are?" - Mini Vandals

(October 30, 2022) Rookie obsessions, mom shoutouts, and Carey Price fanboys, oh my! We're fully in our Blankenburg era and we hope you join us for the ride.    Links & More: Shane Wright first NHL pointWiFi first NHL goalSlafkovsky first NHL goalKJ first NHL goalAdam Fantilli stats x2Kaiden Guhle first NHL goal (and insane stats)Dylan Holloway first NHL pointDougie says hi grandma Ned says hi momBlankenburg continues to amaze and featureCanucks curseSlafkovsky on XhekajZach Kassian vs Arber Xhekaj including strategy talkOskar Lindblom’s return to PhillyPhil the Thrill Pup drop!!!Devils want you to schedule your mammogram and pay attention to the goalSutter sound biteSanny signs contract and TK is the one to spill the beansRR segment  Flyers bring back cooperalls for warmupsPenguins battle on the road mapYotes making the best of it; someone needs to send us some mulletsFlyers statsYotes weird Toronto stat and it continues Martin Jones weird statDylan Larkin knows his role Carey Price fan boysPWPHA sees Brandon Tanev, Heavy WiFi trafficNick Robertson’s path to the NHLECHL coaches make history   Credits Hosts: Iris, Jess, and Puff Producer/Engineer: Jess Music: "Mulholland'" - King Canyon

(October 31, 2022) The group gets together to give you a rundown of the best Halloween costumes across the league! Links & More: Kuraly as Laine 5:24Bruins (Mario edition) 6:35Barbie Girl Gritty 14:47Charlie Coyle - miss trunchbull 17:39Tyler Seguin - MGK 12:50Elvis Battle - Taylor Hall vs William Karlsson 10:19Cutest Oilers fan costume 20:09Flyers brick wall but will it fit gritty’s wide hips 15:19NYR dodgeball group 16:46 Logan Thompson joins couple’s costume (Roy) 11:27Bruins ACTUAL Halloween 35:10Finnish Mafia 8:27Phil Kessel Iron Man Costume 3:34Steve Dangle Canadian Clown costume 3:49What are you afraid of (American boys and clowns) 4:34Brady Tkachuk - Will Ferrell costumes 16:25Jesse Puljujarvi wins the internet, and wins at Halloween 21:20Matthew Tkachuk Avatar 22:57Connor McDavid Scarface 25:06People dressed as Ken: Tyson Barrie, Zadorov 26:11Flames costumes 26:27Cody Ceci Wrecking Ball 28:12Pasta doing Sia 28:29Devils group costume 29:01Dangle family costumes: Steve Dangle and Leo 30:17Strome family 31:04Konecny family 31:20DeBrincat family 31:35Kraken Tanev costume 32:16Jared McCann Avatar 32:26Nick Suzuki & Xhekaj 32:55Tyson Foerster 37:41   Credits Hosts: Iris, Jess, and Puff Producer/Engineer: Jess Music: "Sinister'" - Anno Domini Beats

(October 15, 2022) The season's started and your favorite hockey friends are back with their takes on Seattle's mascot, the player Twitter you should be following, and Josh Anderson's superhero side gig as well as which upcoming games might be the spiciest.    Links in the Notes Blackhawks need nicknames - 4:45Captain Kyle Okposo - 6:19Josh Anderson is now spiderman - 9:08“Grow as a Team” - 10:41Cale Makar Slurpee Cup - 12:42Avs bench save - 13:54Joey Daccord assist - 14:48Flyers Swedish Connection - 16:05Connor Bedard Stats - 18:18Nick Blankenburg blocks Ovi shot - 19:56Flame Big Z “controversy” - 21:28Both Tkachucks and Ritchies score on the same night - 24:34The Rock is a Leafs fan - 24:24Kraken Mascot - 27:10Caps cat! and Dylan/Bennie Strome - 29:36Dylan Strome just wants to be wanted - 31:10Cody Glass makes the Preds roster - 32:54Sandin gets signed after mushroom hunting - 34:30Baby segment (Johnny Gaudreau and John Klingberg) - 35:54Radem Simek’s mom candid jersey moment - 38:19Handsomest coach Bruce Boudreau’s reaction Mike Sullivan reaction - 39:17Connor Ingram’s twitter - 42:15Devils still don’t like Jon Hamm - 44:39The leafs and Tim Hortons feat the most adorable kid, Auston Matthews and Morgan Reilly go in disguise - 45:44Jeremy Swayman, big figure skating guy (again) - 47:08Sens Hot Mic - 47:46Canadiens’ video - 49:45Arber Xhekaj - 51:11Jordan Harris: Uber Eats driver - 52:08Tort’s soundbites: hockey players have the attention span of an amoeba, it’s a body injury - 54:38time to tank for bedard - 56:16A day back home with Trevor Zegras - 57:32Sydney Daniels, the first female scout for the Jets - 1:00:40   Credits Hosts: Iris, Jess, Mac and Puff Producer/Engineer: Jess Music: "Keep On Movin'" - King Canyon

(September 25, 2022) The intercontinental brain cell twins are at it again. We're talkin' childhood milk commercials, the Sens' new leadership, everything narratively appealing from media day, and more.   Links in the Notes Representation station Kraken Alexandra Mandrycky AGM.  Off the ice Jimmy Stu signs his big deal. What he’s doing with the money. Getting called out by his agent. Nazem Kadri makes 1 million dollar donation to London hospital. Patrik Laine’s off-season drip: UNO shoes. Captain Nick. Alternate captain Glaude Giroux. NHL leadership discussion: what do the teams look like?Brock Boeser interview (I’m not crying, you’re crying). Mass retirement: Chara (Maple Leafs roast), Yandle, Subban. Good thing PK already has a new job. Why no organ, Caps?Only Brendan Gallagher would get punched in the nose during a hug. Everybody to the lobby! Smoke alarm!  Goalie segment Designed by Anderson Junior: goalie pads. Sorokin summer goals: stop pucks. James Reimer helmet wtf. James Reimer breaks in his pads. Pekka and Juuse: reunited and it feels so good.  Media day Prospects judge the shootout attempt. Bordeleau, Rossi, and Brisson judge Reichel. The Tkachuk brothers are not artists. Why is Trevor Zegras in a cactus costume?Art of Steve Dangle. Roasted by Mrs. Dangle. Crosby vs Fleury prank war. NHL rules: Barzal has some notes. Omg they were roommates: Lapierre & Iorio. Werenski will only fight Dylan Larkin. Kaprisov is going to need to backcheck - new dad Zuccarello is too tired.Jordie Benn likes milk.  Trevor Zegras is also not an artist.  Social media Robert Thomas versus Logic. Chess match. CMPunk does not like the Pens. He’s previously pissed off Isles fans. Habs fan restaurant fires shots at Leafs.Calling out Elliotte: it’s CGY.  Games we’re looking forward to? Iris talks about new favorite Sens line: Timmy and the short kingsColorado and Chicago play each other again for their season opener. That… didn’t go so well for Chicago last year. Battle of Alberta October 15 and October 29 - but we're a little less interested now Ratthew’s in FloridaBattle of Florida Friday October 21Tkachuk vs Tkachuk Saturday October 29 Credits Hosts: Iris and Puff Producer/Engineer: Mac Music: "Retro" - Wayne Jones

(September 4, 2022) Four friends - you heard that right, four friends - delve deep into the lore files to bring you the cutest, dorkiest, funniest, and raunchiest stories from the hockey world.    Link in the Notes Avs Stanley Cup shenanigans Alex Newhook: the tournament. The pictures. Bo Byram eats French toast out of the Cup. With fake syrup. Nazem Kadri brings the Cup to the London Mosque. NAK gets a Cup tattoo. Including the dent. The EJ slip ‘n slide.  Lore Adam Henrique pads of seductionTyler Seguin steers and queersBunch mox gate Jamie BennTaylor Hall breeding material. And now he put a ring on it. Eddie Lack: tacos. Ketchup on pasta. (Lack and Luongo lore?)Tyler Johnson woman on Jimmy KimmelHall, Eberle, and We’re the MillersHall, Eberle and the saddest game of hangmanChara bondage bed?Landeskog bachelor party. Forehead dildo. The Brioux boys. Including Christmas card. Brobeans (related to Tom Wilson’s wedding)Ovi, the early years The Superior Tkachuk. US/Canada rivalry marriages.  Social media Linus Ullmark has competition for Swayman’s hugging affections. COVERGIRL(S)! Ducks tweet. Sorokin and Romanov go for a softee. Sean Monahan is a Hab. Sean MonaHAB. They’re doing Boring Sean Monahan. Biosteel camp Kasperi Kapanen made a feline friend. College Game Day in Columbus. The Backstreet Boys are polyteamorous like we are. Matthew Tkachuk HelloFresh Women’s worlds HILARY KNIGHT breaks the record. US quarterfinals: Hannah Bilka’s father and the hat saga. Morgan Compher, the other Compher.  We attend games Jess follows up on the charity game. A signing! Credits Hosts: Iris, Jess, Mac, and Puff Producers: Mac and Steph Engineer: Mac Music: "Retro" by Wayne Jones

(August 21, 2022) It's the World Juniors 2022 special! To celebrate, we play our very first game, indulge in a lot of music discourse, and opine on the state of the Flyers. Gather round, y'all. We love our horse girls here. Links in the Notes Avs Stanley Cup Tour It’s not an Avs party unless someone plays All The Small Things. (Darcy Kuemper)Erik Johnson names a horse after Cale. Cale shows the Cup to grandma. Do we joke about the feet pic?Cogliano and Landy in a horse drawn carriage for Nate’s cup day.  Representation station Joel Martin Head Coach of Kalamazoo Wings. 2nd black HC World Juniors The return of Ivan Ivan. Why this name?Connor Bedard is ridiculous (and kind of a little shit). Luke Hughes is the best Hughes. And playing injured. Did we learn nothing from Draisaitl?Kent Johnson Michigan goal. That’s what they teach you in Michigan. The Latvia ice cream saga. Making the quarter finals. Martin Lavins video. Our very own Puff actually offered to get them ice creamThomas Bordeleau, mama’s boy.  Scoring leaders after prelims (aka Luke Hughes and Bordy fangirling for US, McTavish for Canada)Mason McTavish dick trick. Reminder of what the lore is for calling it thatGoal songs. Ranking?McTavish came so close to breaking records. KJ fake slapper to McT one timer. Hot damn. Gold medal game goes to OT. McTavish for Vezina. KJ golden goal. KJ and Bedard play 3 on 3 every Sunday.Bedard “shit himself”? Good interviews.Narratives of Dylan Garand and Devon Levi. The promise to get the gold this time.   Social media/off the ice:  Shattenkirk tells all. Trevor Zegras gossip. Johnny Gaudreau wants Chuck Fletcher fired. Just like Jess and Iris. Nick Suzuki isn’t going to take a pic with the Leafs logo. Nope. Premier Hockey Federation: Force Montreal. Should have grabbed the Twitter too. Sean Monahan stan account hours. TJ Brodie injury. Mental health unit Foothills hospital. Good luck in Montreal buddy. The Devils just lost a fan. Cale Makar, Calgary tourism.  Cole, Nick Suzuki, Dylan Larkin, playing with the Petry kids The gang attends games Jess goes to a charity game. Pics. Credits Hosts: Iris, Jess, and Puff Producer/Engineer: Mac Music: "Retro" by Wayne Jones

(August 7, 2022) Three hosts kvetch about signings, trades, and other off season content, then reveal their ~backstories.~ And, just for the record: yes, you could totally bless lemonade. Link in the Notes Social media Named for a legend: MPP the horse.Chase Priskie, big LinkedIn guyJack Campbell makes a young goalie’s day. Joonas Donskoi saves a local skate park. His jersey’s in the rafters. Habs culture, a segment by Jess. Talk about a potential Cole number switch please. Christina Marleau roasts her husband. K’Andre Miller makes a lifelong fan. The Russians all hang out in the off-season. For *charity*. Ty and Dylan Jackson, Leafs prospects and twins, finish each other’s… sentences.Mikko Lehtonen. The roasting of Steve will never end. Sedins used to switch jerseys and used their twin powers for *chaos*.  Representation station Luke Prokop, 1 year after coming out Trades and signings:  Beat reporters, sharing the tea after trades. Dylan Strome talks fast. The Matthew Tkachuk trade. At least one joke about how Puff can say his name in Edmonton now. Brady has opinions. Probably because Matthew stole his thunder. Sportsnet article about asking for a trade.   Do we have thoughts and comments on any of the other trades? Which ones do we like/hate/etc? Avs Stanley Cup tour It wasn’t just ice cream: Jack Johnson’s kids baptized in Stanley Cup. Darcy Kuemper taking the cup to a local hospital and showing it to the kids.  Games and off-season content Who are we, what are our teams and how did we get thereGoal songs for players, our suggestions. Credits Hosts: Iris, Jess, and Puff Producers: Mac and Steph Engineer: Steph Music: "Retro" - Wayne Jones

(July 17, 2022) This is the sound a brain cell makes as it bounces between Europe and Canada. Iris and Puff break down all the good stuff around the draft, the first days of free agency, and highlight some wholesome Cup celebrations. Also Mac finally breaks down the fourth wall to defend press conferences. Link In The Notes Representation station Mike Grier GM of the Sharks. Kevin Weekes breaks the news… in front of a shark tank. First black GM in NHL history. Maple Leafs: Dr. Hayley Wickenheiser assistant GM. Coachella Valley Firebirds (Kraken AHL affiliate): Jessica Campbell assistant coach. The Athletic has a whole article about her road to this job. Devils: Kate Madigan assistant GM. LA Kings: Manon Rheaume as Hockey Operations and Prospect Advisor.  NHL draft Jack Hughes the second. Eventually got drafted 51st overall by the LA Kings. NY Rangers: Brendan Othmann finally got that proper draft moment. Vegas: Artur Cholach, from Ukraine, also gets draft moment. Morgan Geekie gets sassy on Twitter. Prospect fell down the stairs after being drafted. Link is dead. Cutter Gauthier drafted 5th overall to the Flyers - used to be a Crosby fan growing up. Can we still change our pick? Stars pick Bichsel is a kitchen legend. Frequently bought together, do not separate: Anaheim Ducks draft Tristan Luneau and Noah Warren. Canucks complete their collection of Elias Petterssons. Twitter has fun with it. But the Petterssons have never met. Weird name stat! Don’t worry though, Petey 1.0 is having fun with it on social media. Devils, come get your food! Puff’s Juraj Slafkovsky segment: the Wingate damage. The Leafs Hat. He can cook - with a stove. Draft prospects discuss hockey debates. Isaac Howard best dressed sass. Top draft picks in 2022 draft: baby pictures edition. WHICH PROSPECTS WILL WE ADOPT? Free agency Ryan McDonagh interview after being traded to the Preds… gets interrupted. Connor Brown traded to free up his number… True or false? Jaromir Jagr is still available. The Canes do a very moving Twitter tribute. Johnny Hockey to Columbus - to get over his fear of the cannon? Either way, where he goes Andrew Brown would like to follow. Don’t worry Andrew, Fox 28 Columbus has your back. The city of Chicago did not like the DeBrincat trade. The Ottawa Senators REALLY DID. OUR THOUGHTS on signings and trades. Iris hyped about Sens Girl Summer. Puff distraught about more years of EKane.  Development camp Hi this is a Luke Prokop stan account. Caps babies: OMG they were roommates. Such a nice prospect, that Dumais guy.  Social media Joel Farabee knows real champions. Best schedule announcement ever award goes to: Dougie Hamilton and the corniest thing we’ve ever seen. Evgeni Malkin is a troll. Doesn’t want to play against Kris Letang. Samuel Girard is a troll who misses Tyson Jost. Spicy pork in New York? Louis Domingue wants to know. Mitch Marner: I heard David Kampf is shredded. Jack Johnson cup day: let them eat… ice cream. Ducks prospect Will Francis beat chemo. Be careful what you say on social media. Someone’s family might be watching. Who has money to print an NHL contract anyway? Jeremy Davies sure doesn’t.  Weird stats David Perron only ever signed a contract with the Blues. Rangers Ryans per season count.    Credits Hosts: Puff and Iris  Producers: Mac and Steph Engineer: Mac Music: "Retro" - Wayne Jones

(July 3, 2022) Jess third wheels, Puff has to whisper about Matthew Tkachuk, and Iris drops the worst joke on the pod to date. Buckle up y'all, this is a good one. Off the ice Alexander Ovechkin is a soccer star now. He’s a nightmare for goalies in every sport - that one timer is just as lethal on the soccer field. TSN hockey Nathalie Spooner pregnancy announcementCapitals promote Emily Engel-Natzke to NHL video coordinator. First fulltime female coach in franchise history. Goalie mask innovation!  Social media Luke Prokop and Brock McGinn Twitter shenanigans Tuukka Rask will return. Using everything he borrowed from his former teammates. But he has some questions about the All Star vote he got. He’s definitely keeping himself entertained now that he’s retired. Mika Zibanejad is not impressed that he wasn’t nominated for best bromance. Braden Holtby back in DC for the Pride parade. No sighting of tortoises, sadly. Former Flyers winning things and causing absolute chaos. NAK and Alex Lyon (who got suspended two games for this, one for each middle finger?)Brock Boeser contract extension post on Insta. Why’d he have to bring poor Cal Peterson into it? Weird stats Darcy Kuemper, first ever goalie to assist on an OT winner in the SCF. Cale Makar first unanimous winner of the Conn Smythe.  NHL awards Moritz Seider and his dapper bowtie take home the Calder. And Dylan Larkin was there. Those mean tweets from 2019 didn’t age well, huh. Igor Shesterkin wins the Vezina and is precious. Want a headband like his? Amazon, apparently. Cale Makar is awkward - but he won the Norris and now Devon Toews owes him an iPad. With lots of gigs apparently. Auston Matthews went casual and… yes.  The Avs Stanley Cup win shenanigans Nazem Kadri says kiss my ass. Nicolas Aube-Kubel dented the damn cup. Within 6 minutes? That’s a record. Tag yourself which expression is the most you… (Did we already cover this? Under former flyers social media?)The Hat Saga continues: Peter Baugh’s hat touched it firstAvs defeat all the evil exesPut that on fucking Twitter. The start of the Bo “white girl wasted” Byram saga Mostly naked Val Nichushkin. Landeskog showed up naked to Erik Johnson’s bedroom the morning after. With the cup. And then EJ took the morning after Cup pic. Gabe Landeskog has a future in chicken. Stanley Cup took a wrong turn, ended up with Landeskog’s neighbors. What do we even say about Erik Johnson Stanley Cup Parade shenanigans Naz Too Many Men shirts - Adrienne Ruth (guffychan)Bo Byram is a player - someone tell the cops. White girl wasted Bo Byram, the sequel. There’s a video too. Which kind of drunk are you, Avs edition?Pavel Francouz’s daughter is the only smart one: naps are awesome   Credits Hosts: Jess, Iris, and Puff Producers: Mac and Steph Engineer: Mac Music: "Retro" - Wayne Jones

(June 19, 2022) The gang talks SCF, good boys, and what's happening during the off season. Jess declares at least two hills they're willing to die on. Puff delivers more Edmonton lore. Iris reveals her true purpose: roasting Puff.  Engineering notes: Yeah, I know. I'm doing my best. Plan is to catch up ASAP and be back on track for the season. Thank you for forgiveness, hopefully!   Link In the Notes On the ice Ref gets sandwiched between Pat Maroon and Ryan Reaves. Straight up not having a good time. The Avs and figuring out if they should touch it. The trophy, you pervs. Why the Oilers should re-sign Jesse Puljujärvi, an essay by Puff. Game 1 of the SCF went to OT because Caps’ Samantha Pell was in the building. Burky OT winner means Burky narratives right? Uber story. The Avs beat the Lightning… 7 to nothing.  Off the ice Nathan MacKinnon cares about escrow. Manson vs. Manson. At least Dave got to see his granddaughter?Martin St. Louis is sticking around. To keep us sane. Keyword: culture. Sorry to his kid’s team, though. The Keep Johnny Hockey In Calgary campaign. Neighbors. Johnny, do you want a free copier? Erie Otters reunion in the Western Conference final. scored by… Mikko Lehtonen? Wait, who? Steve needs google. Canadiens stay winning in the hiring department: MPPThe Rangers are haunted by Joe Sakic. the drama of the Rangers offer sheeting Sakic and the Avs keeping him because of stakes in a fucking Harrison Ford movie? Now that’s a story Pride segment Lexi Brown says Happy Pride, y’all. Scott Laughton: ally. Raising a flag is hard though. (his brother is queer, y’all) Combine:  The Habs have some tough interview questions…Vincenz Rohrer is 5/5 in candy shooting. That oughta get him drafted. Christian Kyrou loved the Wingate. Brother of Blues legend and cutie Jordan. Puff actually called him cute in a previous episode okay Social media Matthew Tkachuk is a good boy. Taking pictures with Oilers fans literally the day after the series against the Oilers ended. Justin Bieber and Auston Matthews play chess. Nuggets, graphic design is not your passionJack Eichel loves kids and we are in our feels. Landeskog & Makar bloopers. The Dadonov trade. For real this time. Jimmy Eats World makes their case to remain Panthers goal song. Other Ryan Ellis strikes again Weird stats Rangers scored twice as many goals against Vasi in their first game as the Panthers did in their entire series. It’s CALE MAKAR. Recorded at least 9 points in a 4 game sweep, twice. How many times has this happened in history? Four times. 50% of that is Cale. Mikko Lehtonen - I mean Arturi Lehkonen - has done it again. OT winner to send his team to the SCF. The end of the Jagr era? Unless international teammates count. Vasy is great when the series is on the line (but wtf was game 2)Iris loves Bowen Byram. Born 4 days after the Avs won the Cup in 2001. He’s #4. Avalanche 7 evil exes their way to the finals?  Credits Hosts: Iris, Jess, and Puff. Producers: Mac and Steph. Engineer: Mac Music: "Nilly Willy" - Yung Logos

(May 30, 2022) Three friends are back with cat ownership tips, wacky All Star Game games, questions for casual Drake fans, and insight into the differences between Europeans and North Americans. Hope y'all have your boots on. It's time to ride. Your friendly local producer/engineer/co-host is finally (?) starting to recover from some major life changes and trying to catch up on editing. Direct your complaints to omgtheywereteammates@gmail.com if you want to hear all about Mac's astrological transits and personal drama.   Link In The Notes On the ice Andre Burakovsky *through* the net goal. What even Iris has World Championships storiesKreider, Zibanejad and the iPadFirst woman drafted to the CHLEverybody else in the penalty box… Mika Zibanejad has a skate blade issue. AHL goalie goal. Joel Hofer, Springfield Thunderbirds.  Off the ice Samantha Pell and the sandwich. There is video. Peter Baugh’s hat. Real recognizes real. Brady Tkachuk friendship tour. 5 min segment. At least. Tkachuk cam. Throwing t-shirts. Grabbing a random kid to put on his shoulders. Holding one beer with two more in his back pocket. The Budweiser sponsorship. Don’t take Vasilevskiy’s spot for stretching. Flames support Ben Stelter. No matter his Nerf Gun violence against Matthew. Jaromir Jagr. What even. Stand with NazHilary Knight y’all. What’s that chihuahua doing at the Avs game?Team Switzerland, intricate warmup rituals. Adam Gaudette and his crystals. Nick Suzuki and his candy dealings. Florida Panthers went to a strip club before being swept. Sources say so. Trevor Zegras Chipotle ad Weird stats The Leafs’ recordbreaking leafing of a must win game. Kings/Oilers and Stars/Flames were intertwined. UNTIL GAME SEVEN.  Social media Steve’s heart rate is at its lowest when the Leafs lose. Also did you know a Dangle is now an official unit of measurement?Drake posting Auston Matthews pic. Suiting up for the Devils next season: Mark Hamill. Cursing Jake Oettinger on RedditRipping your pants is good luck, ask Tyler Bozak. McDavid to Vancouver? You okay Elliotte?Pens fan in Toronto crowd. Tom Brady and LeBron James. Hockey shootout. TJ Oshie wants in. Team GB tea production line. JD and TZ flip their hair. Very important content. Don’t steal Kennedy’s content! Boston Bruins anthem singer visits Jimmy Hayes’ son for a special performance Playoffs ahead Iris and Puff are very invested in Oilers-Avs. Anything else? Meh.    Credits Hosted by Iris, Jess, and Puff Produced by Mac and Steph Engineered by Mac Music: "Nilly Willy" by Yung Logos

(May 8, 2022) Three friends have some hilarious shit to say about pretty much all things narratively juicy in the NHL. One friend/producer/engineer's life is lowkey falling apart, hence the tardiness. We've got plenty of queer quips and irreverent takes on hockey in the hopper. Come get y'all some. Link in the Notes On the ice Please bring the puck with you on a penalty shot. What is it with these Bruins? Shades of Marchand losing it. Jersey off our backs gets horny. Go LombergFor Mac: Chara goes off. No one told Micah Parsons how to drop the puck. Matthew Tkachuk is clutch and scores to tie it with ZERO POINT ONE SECOND LEFT. Mac & Iris’ anthem corner: Malcolm Subban edition. EBUG: Thomas HodgesDouble OT legend Louis Domingue. The spicy pork saga - now being sold at the arena. https://twitter.com/nhlhistorygirl/status/695646039609462786 Cale Makar left ankles on the ice. Again.  Off the ice Nana-nana-nana-nana… Bettman? Biden, dude, what’chu doing?Flyers rookies warm my cold dead heart. Drake is all about his goals. Like Ovechkin. Our proposal to get rid of the canon in Columbus. It’s for Jess, Johnny Hockey, and scared broadcasters everywhere. Brady Tkachuk, bartending shirtless. I do not have words. Captain shit. Kodak returns to a Panthers game. Something about these playoffs makes for some interesting answers in press conferences Watch a Leafs game with Steve Dangle. Now with heart rate monitor. it’s ‘cause he doesn’t trust the leafs to hold a lead. if they go up 3-1 poor steveCanes legend Pyotr Kochetkov has a very capable translator in… Andrei Svechnikov?Edmonton puts up signs of 29 and 97. Our local reporter Puff investigates. Social media Remember when everyone rooted for the Sharks? Let Mike Smith score. The Oilers have the graphic ready - he’s been so close!Tony X just wants to see the goals. Iris can relateScoring goals sells jerseys. 60 for Matthews, also #1 in jerseys sold. Girl at Raptors game slowly realizes she’s sitting next to Auston Matthews, the face journey Fashion icon Matthew TkachukTaylor Lewan has trouble understanding the score. twitter can be confusing!!! Trash talk 101 with Landeskog and Makar. cale makar music video, best chirper? most creative chirpsNanny Marner in the house. Seth Jarvis, fake ID for a puck.  Weird stats Ilya Lyubushkin is a goal scorer now. Career high of TWO goals. Lomberg and instigating in the final five minutes. That’s a thing only he’s gotten suspended for. BF “he did *what* now!?Joel Farabee vs Keith Yandle +/-   Credits Music: "We Made It" - Reed Mathis Hosted by Iris, Jess, and Puff. Produced by Mac and Steph. Engineered by Mac.

(April 24, 2022) Three friends, fast and loose on all things narratively juicy in the National Hockey League!    (Engineering notes: One of the friend's fidgets can be heard occasionally in the background; I promise I won't play with it on the pod again... Puff's audio is also occasionally a bit staticky for reasons beyond my comprehension, but it's not bad!)    Link in the Notes On the ice Freddie Andersen can dangle. Carey Price returns. Nick Suzuki has the appropriate outfit. Black on-ice officials working together for the first time. Patrick Kane breaks some ankles and surprises himself. (and will we ever know what happened with that fan in Nashville?)Ilya Samsonov does a header. Soccer goalie style. Jamie Benn gets benched. First time he’s gone face first into someone else’s box. Sens-Habs. Kastelic celebrating his first career goal with a fight. RIGHT AWAY. Two goals, no assist, no Gordie Howe. Also, Jimmy Stu lives in the Habs’ heads rent fucking free, wow. (and drew three penalties)Boko Imama first career goal. A nice suck it to every racist asshole who’s stood in his way.  Off the ice Schrodinger’s goalie: the Robin Lehner storyJosh Manson: a lot of chicken. Ryan Hartman: an icon. Flips off Evander Kane, when fans raise money for the fine, he donates it to a children’s hospital. Lightning players talk to Sara Civian about their drip. Bo Byram is back, and he’s had a rough time. Iris gets emotional. It’s hard to recognize your teammate after a haircut. Poor Kahkonen. Macklemore and Marshawn own part of the Seattle Kraken now. Marshawn has fun on the Zamboni about it. Dave Filoni - Pittsburgh Star Wars connection Matthew Tkachuk beats his dad’s record. The 99 points puck story. And falling on his face when getting 100 points. Charlie Macavoy’s sister interns for the Rangers. But look at the cute! Stars had a harrowing plane experience after a painful road trip. Wild prank filling car full of packing peanuts? Social media Grandma Power goes to her first Leafs game. And her first Sabres game. UMich boys celebrate their CBJ boys. Canes fan looks for 15 minutes of fame after fight. Brady Tkachuk and Josh Norris “sing” Mr Brightside after loss to the Leafs. Avs young guns try CLIMBR and do an ad. Keep your chin up, Ryan Graves. Jacob Markstrom has trouble spelling his name. Called out by his girlfriend. Vegas admits to throwing the breakaway challenge. But they won’t fix it because the Ducks lost to the Kings. Sad. Kevin Hayes has taught his nephew well. Celly for Jimmy. Iris has been crying, it’s fine.  Weird stats Isles Chara scores only against the Pens. Over 20 years apart17 April, all goals from 0-9 hit. Yes, it was that 9-1 Calgary gameYoung defensemen, old goalie. Buffalo’s young d-men protect their goalie. Cole Caufield is the same height as Chara’s stick? Mac I need receipts.  Games we’re looking forward to Vegas vs Dallas Tuesday April 26Playoffs: which matchups are we hoping for? Which narratives?   Credits Music: "Two Little Bums" - The Great North Sound Society   Hosted by Iris, Mac, and Puff Engineered and Produced by Mac Special thanks to Jess and Steph

(April 11, 2022) Three friends and their slutty intern (but actually just four friends, nobody gets paid here) talk all things narratively juicy in the National Hockey League (and occasionally the wider world of hockey). We’ve got strong feelings about special jerseys, good and bad broadcasters, funny stats and sweet stories. Where else could you hear about all of this in one place?   Links In The Notes Pens behaving badly Brothers in the NHL Super High Sticking Seattle’s pride jersey artist speaks YOU CAN ACTUALLY BUY THE CANUCKS’ COOL WARMUPS Seriously y’all, get a load of this bullshit TZ goes off It’s Sebastians Aho Who knew Corey Perry had this many feelings Cameron Lizotte, fashion designer Quinn Hughes plays hooky It’s okay Jimmy, Brady approves Dr. Alexander Ovechkin, Rules Analyst Suits for all the boys Sabres Legend, Rick Jeanneret Making friends with muffins 420 69 nice Think one 69 joke is enough? lol Gotta score ‘em all Jack Hughes for Lady Byng The last time Eric Staal scored a hat trick… That sure is a proposal Still waiting for Joel Farabee’s album Owen Power… now charging… GOALIE LOVE IS THE BEST LOVE Big Rig is hot, graphic design is nice Brady and the Hat Trick Kids Another trade fell through In which Sara Civian is all of us   Credits Music: “Funky Space Princess” by Dyalla. Hosts: Iris, Jess, Mac, and Puff. Produced and Engineered by Mac. Special thanks to Steph.

(March 27, 2022) Three friends tell each other (and you!) the funniest, sweetest, strangest stories from around the NHL and beyond. There’s a lot this week, so strap in. Link in the Notes   1k apples A ref yeets his teeth Slo-mo shootout How to win a hockey game in 17 shots or less Goalie 1: Eve Gascon Goalie 2: Carter Hart Jagr flirts with Ovi Robertson v. Robertson Happy birthday Kurtis MacDermid? It’s face-lickin’ good The bunch mox origin story DJ shoulda stuck with Garrett Sparks Ian Cole and Lorelai, the follow up Thanks, Dad Jeff Skinner goes Bald for Bucks Stars Legend, Jake Oettinger Jimmy? Timmy? Stu? We’re not okay about Claude Giroux Fifi is excited for Flower Kyle-on-Kyle Feud OMG They’re Still Teammates Twitter comes through for Hanna Rod the Bod drinks hot tea Jack Campbell walks his cat Music Credit “New Day” - Patrick Patrikios Hosted by Iris, Mac, and Puff. Produced by Mac. Special Thanks to Jess and Steph.