Play. Learn. Thrive. with Alanna Gallo

Alanna Gallo

Together we’ll slow down, stop rushing our kids through life and raise lifelong learners who will become confident and independent adults.



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Kids & FamilyKids & Family

Episodes

Episode 9: Big kids and adults need play too
Jun 24 2021
Episode 9: Big kids and adults need play too
In today’s episode, I talk to Jeff Harry, author of Rediscover Your Play and self-described play whisperer. Jeff helps people rediscover who they are and helps create psychologically safe spaces through play. He joins us today to discuss what play means to him and how play benefits everyone.Jeff starts off by telling us his origin story. When he was a kid, he saw the movie Big and began writing to toy companies in third grade. For Jeff, his dream came true, but it wasn’t what he wished for - it was just adults sitting around tables. He left that career and found an ad online asking for help teaching kids engineering through Lego and made it happen. Their reputation grew and they became the first Lego-based STIM group. They even started doing team-building exercises in Silicon Valley.When Jeff talks about play, he defines it as any joyful act where you forget about time. It’s something that adults often lose eventually. We don’t embrace the feeling of failure and experimentation, which is a huge part of play. As Jeff says, play is the opposite of perfection, which is rooted in shame. If the pandemic taught us anything, it’s that no one knows what they are doing, so why not embrace the joyful moments and work to make more of them?In the post-pandemic world, Jeff hopes we can stop overscheduling our kids. Let them be kids and stop trying to make them be the best. If they are in sports, ask them if they are actually enjoying the experience. If they aren’t, let them choose to do what they enjoy. Let your kids have experiences and learning over getting perfect grades. Tell them they don’t have to be perfect to be deserving of love.Find out more about Jeff:https://www.rediscoverplay.com
Episode 7: Pandemic Parenting + Independent Play
May 19 2021
Episode 7: Pandemic Parenting + Independent Play
On this episode of Play. Learn. Thrive., Julia Dennison, and Alanna discuss all things pandemic parenting. Julia lives in Queens, New York, and is the digital content creator for Parents magazine as well as a co-parent to her four-year-old daughter. Julia and Alanna talk about the difficulties of working from home with your kids around and the need to take away the guilt of not playing with your child all the time. Remember: independent play is good for your child! Julia also goes over some of the main concerns and struggles of parents during the pandemic and encourages you to give yourself a break, ask for help, and remove all possible stressors so you can be the parent you want to be.  Main Takeaways: ●      An introduction to who Julia is and what she does.●      Julia’s work and parenting experience at the beginning of the pandemic.●      When “letting go” in parenting lines up with something that’s good for your child. It’s not “lazy parenting!”●      The importance of doing things you enjoy with your child and not feeling guilty for not entertaining them constantly. ●      Let your child navigate by themselves and don’t interrupt their play. ●      Parents’ biggest struggles and worries during the pandemic. ●      Being honest with yourself about how hard things are and giving yourself a break. Reduce stress in your life so you can be the parent you want to be.●      How to connect with Julia. Parenting has never been a walk in the park and parenting in a pandemic has not made things any easier! It means that many parents are working from home with children who often need to fend for and play by themselves. While some parents may feel guilt for working and not playing with their kids, Julia encourages listeners that this is not “lazy parenting!” Independent play is good for your child.  Even as companies begin to go back to normal, many parents (especially moms) are still having a hard time and need someone to listen. Julia and Alanna discuss some of parents’ biggest struggles and concerns about parenting during the pandemic, such as the difficulty in maintaining work-life balance, the mental load on moms, the concern that kids are getting too much screen time, and how your own stress can trickle down and affect the way you parent and interact with your kids.  With hard and stressful times upon us, it’s important that, as a parent, you give yourself a break and take as much stress off your plate as you can. On the other side of the pandemic, you can make a conscious effort to get back on track and do things the way you want them to be done. Until then, remember that parenting is hard and even more so now! Take a deep breath, give yourself a break, and don’t be afraid to ask for help from your “village.”   Related Links:Parents Website: Parents.comJulia’s Instagram: @JuliadennisonJulia’s Podcast: We are Family
Episode 6: Developing Speech + Language with Play
May 12 2021
Episode 6: Developing Speech + Language with Play
On this episode of Play. Learn. Thrive., Nazli Blackwell, a pediatric speech and language pathologist shares her passion for Montessori as well as her expertise about how play intersects with language development in a child. She discusses the importance of playtime (not screen time) and references an interesting research study on how a child’s language affects an adult’s perception of their play. She also goes over what play looks like for children from zero to five and what sorts of toys are good at fostering the cognitive skills we want for our kids!Main Takeaways:●      A bit about Nazli’s career as a speech and language pathologist and her personal experience with Montessori. ●      How speech and language development intersect with play, which is how children learn about the world.●      Symbolic play: when children begin to think flexibly and creatively about objects.●      The direct correlation between screen time, which is passive for a child, and playtime, which is active.●      A research study on four groups of children and the role of language in free play. It was found that language makes a big difference in how we interpret a child’s play.●      What parents can keep in mind and look for while observing their child’s play.●      Toys that require children to problem-solve and develop cognitive skills.  Play is intricately connected to so many aspects of a child’s development and their speech and language development is no different! Nazli Blackwell, a speech and language pathologist, has a background in public schools as well as private practice and is passionate about early childhood and Montessori. As she mentions, speech and language are developed as children speak and read with their parents but also as they play! Play is how children learn about the world and their play directly involves language.   Nazli talks about symbolic play, which is when children begin to think flexibly and creatively about objects, using one object to represent another. This begins at an early age, around one or two, and later develops into more complex play. These play sequences are the precursor to literary skills such as the ability to respond to a prompt and begin a storyline.Having plenty of playtime is so essential to a child’s development! This is one of the reasons that screen time is discourage, since time in front of a screen simply takes away from the time that a child could spend in play.  Nazli also shares about a research study done on four groups of children participating in free play. She discusses the role not only of language in play but also how play was interpreted by observers when they could hear child’s commentary versus when they couldn’t hear.  At the end of the episode, Nazli gets practical about what you as a parent can keep an eye out for in your child’s play and how you can foster cognitive skills. Make sure your two- to five-year-old is doing parallel play, engaging with other children around, and getting creative and flexible with their play and use of toys. And, last but not least, provide your little one with toys that require them to activate the use of the toy, encouraging problem-solving and the development of important cognitive skills!  Related Links:Nazli’s Instagram: @themontessorislpNazli’s Email:  themontessorislp@gmail.com
Episode 5: The Psychological Importance of Play + How to Recover from Helicopter Parenting
Feb 17 2021
Episode 5: The Psychological Importance of Play + How to Recover from Helicopter Parenting
On this episode of Play. Learn. Thrive., clinical psychologist Sarah Mundy shares with Alanna insights about the importance of play in the development of confident, self-motivated, independent kids. In addition to being a core element of emotional and intellectual growth, play has been recognized internationally as a fundamental right of children. Sarah highlights clinical experience and data points, but above all else her message derives from simple common sense: Children learn from having fun – and having fun leads to learning!            Main Takeaways:●      A bit about Sarah’s 20-year career as a psychologist (with a special focus on attachment disorders) and children’s author of an interactive series of books for toddlers.●      The concept of “play” as a core, quantifiable part of childhood development.●      Covid19’s impacts on children and chronic over-scheduling as a block to free play. ●      The long-term impacts of helicopter parenting on children’s soft skills.●      Reexamining your parenting style and considering an adjustment.●      Balancing playing with our kids versus fostering play for our kids.●      Cultivating tolerance in parents for somewhat riskier play among children.●      Ways in which parents can provide the safety necessary for their kids to stretch and grow beyond their comfort zones.●      Considering the spectrum from permissive to authoritative parenting styles and finding your place on that spectrum. Despite best intentions, parenting today can tend to be pressure-packed and overly involved with potentially long-lasting impacts on early childhood development. But there is a simple cure: Play! Research clearly demonstrates that unfettered, unstressed playtime confers enormous emotional, cognitive, physical, and creative benefits on children. For “recovering” helicopter parents interested in changing their dynamic, Sarah offers some straightforward steps to consider: 1)    Assess your parenting style and ask yourself: Is this environment serving my child?2)    Reflect and explore: Why the need to push my children so much? Is it helpful to then? What did my parents teach me about achievement? How helpful has it been?3)    Be kind to yourself, recognize your best intentions and consider how you wish to move forward. Do you truly buy into the notion of play as a foundational value and priority? If so, commit to uncovering/recovering playfulness daily.4)    Fostering free-time and play does NOT mean spending all day on the floor with your kids. It should be fluid and allow space for then to create and experience emotions, reactions, and choices on their own.5)    Fostering free-time and play DOES mean cultivating a certain amount of tolerance for risk. Children need to titrate challenging situations over time to develop judgment, decision-making skills, and appropriate boundaries. 6)    Children who feel a consistent sense of safety in the container of their parents are poised to test boundaries in a healthy way. Cultivating freedom, space and unscripted play imbues children over time with resilience, self-confidence, prudence, and joy. In the words of Maria Montessori: “Play is the work of the child.” In this week’s episode, Sarah and Alanna offer both wise perspectives and concrete suggestions every “recovering” helicopter parent will want to hear!Related Links:Sarah’s Website: www.Parentingthroughstories.comInstagram: @Par
Episode 4: Responsive Parenting + Play to Address Child Behavior
Feb 3 2021
Episode 4: Responsive Parenting + Play to Address Child Behavior
On this episode of Play Learn Thrive, Alanna speaks with Sheena Hill, psychotherapist and sleep coach. During their discussion, they touch on how to engage in responsive parenting over behavioral modification, and how to better connect with your young children when they’re struggling with right choices. Main Takeaways:●      Any time your children are under stress, they’re going to have limited access to the skills that they already have. ●      Our understanding of dysregulation needs to change.●      We don’t really need to worry about “teaching lessons” in the moment.●      Use playfulness to redirect frustration.●      Anything that involves a child’s body is where power struggles tend to emerge. Sheena is a responsive behavior coach. She helps parents to understand a positive-parenting approach. Sheena kicks things off by explaining that parenting in the pandemic is harder than normal. Our reserves are lower and our kids’ needs seem higher. We can get stuck in a power cycle this way—but there are still options. First is recognizing that most of us were raised in the behavior modification approach. This ultimately hurts our ability to recognize what’s happening when we see dysregulation. Parents tend to just react with consequences because people can’t fathom what it would look like to stay and support a person through their big feelings. Parents feel attacked when they’re questioned on this, but they should try not to take offense. They want to feel like they’re doing something to prevent bad behavior in the future. Instead, Sheena suggests using playfulness to redirect their frustration. Get them laughing. This way, your child feels understood and like they’re on the same team as you. Ask yourself: are your expectations reasonable for your children? There are lots of things that come before dysregulation that we need to recognize. And it seems that intentional connection with your children’s needs is what works. Parents need to help their children to “reset”—and they’re looking to you to help regulate. Theory is good, but we need to talk about tools. We don’t need to be right; Sheena says. We just need to be wacky. So, what can you do as a parent? Try to remember that your children need you to help them regulate their emotions, and they’re not very good at it. Remember that consequences often have negative effects, and playfulness can often boost confidence in the skills they already have. And finally, remember that you are your child’s coach. You want to see them succeed in life, but it’s not always about teaching a lesson at the moment. Be compassionate and judicious about when it’s the right time for lesson learning. They are looking to you to guide them.  Related Links: Instagram: @parenting_worksFacebook: Parenting WorksCheck out Sheena’s website: Sheenahill.com