Send us a textEver wondered how two music events could offer such contrasting experiences? This episode takes you deep into the chaos and communal spirit of music festivals. We start by recounting the horrifying events of Woodstock 99, where chaos reigned and safety measures fell disastrously short. Then, we shift gears to the heartwarming community found on a music cruise Christopher frequently attends, where collective action and a sense of shared responsibility ensure a safe space for everyone. Listen to firsthand accounts from female attendees who explain how they’ve helped foster an environment of mutual respect and security, proving that concert culture can be both wild and welcoming.Finally, we unravel the ties of establishing effective security protocols at music venues. The importance of having clear procedures for handling incidents like sexual harassment cannot be overstated. We draw on examples like Taylor Swift's proactive measures during her shows to highlight how performers and security teams must work together to maintain a secure environment. From managing large crowds to ensuring unobtrusive yet visible security, we discuss the logistical challenges and the critical role of both security staff and performers. By understanding the unique needs of different events, every concertgoer can enjoy a memorable and safe experience.

Send us a textHow did a celebration of peace and love turn into a chaotic disaster? Join us on the Toxic Cooking Show as we uncover the turbulent history of Woodstock festivals, from the iconic Woodstock '69 that defined a generation with artists like Jimi Hendrix and Janis Joplin, to the unruly and rebellious Woodstock '94 featuring acts like Green Day and Nine Inch Nails. We'll also dive into the dark side of Woodstock '99, a festival marked by aggression and commercialization. Guided by a nostalgic lens, we’ll explore how these events mirrored the societal changes of their times and shaped the festival culture we know today.Brace yourself as we detail the disastrous logistics that plagued Woodstock '99, from extreme heat and contaminated water to insufficient facilities that led to unsanitary conditions. Uncover the sequence of events that escalated the chaos, including Limp Bizkit’s incendiary performance and a disturbing incident during Fatboy Slim’s set. We’ll also discuss the financial strains on attendees and how the promise of a surprise performance contributed to the festival’s catastrophic outcome. Tune in for a riveting exploration that charts the stark contrasts between these historic events and the downfall of what was once a symbol of unity and love.

Send us a textWhat would you do if you witnessed someone in distress in public? This episode of the Toxic Cooking Show challenges you to rethink everything you know about the bystander effect and personal responsibility. This week Lindsay McClane with my co-host, Christopher Patchet, LCSW, we unravel the misconceptions surrounding the infamous Kitty Genovese case and discuss a hauntingly recent incident in London where bystanders failed to act during a sexual assault on a train. We shed light on the psychological stages that paralyze potential helpers and offers professional insights into the complexities of public mental health crises. From the bustling streets of Philadelphia to the cultural melting pots of Paris and Moscow, we share eye-opening personal stories and discuss how societal norms shape our reactions to harassment. Discover the hidden intricacies of navigating public spaces like New York City's subways, and learn how hypervigilance can be a double-edged sword. We also tackle the tough question of why some people intervene in the face of inappropriate behavior while others remain silent. Through these anecdotes, we aim to shed light on the cultural factors that influence bystander behavior and emphasize the importance of early intervention to prevent escalation.Facing the moral and emotional conflicts of public intervention is no easy task, especially when substance abuse is involved. This episode explores the emotional weight of such decisions, highlighting studies that reveal surprising patterns in human behavior during emergencies. We offer practical strategies for confronting derogatory remarks and discuss the significance of empathy and public awareness in mitigating the bystander effect. Join us as we push the boundaries of social norms and explore ways to build a more responsible and compassionate society, one act of courage at a time.

Send us a textWhy do people often stand by and do nothing during emergencies? Discover the unsettling truth behind the bystander effect, starting with the tragic and infamous Kitty Genovese case. We'll recount the chilling details of her 1964 murder and the media portrayal that claimed 38 witnesses did nothing to help. While later investigations revealed attempts at intervention, the case forever changed how we understand public behavior. Fast forward to April 2024, and a similar incident involving Shakia Allen proves that the bystander effect is as relevant today as it was six decades ago.We’ll take you through the haunting realities of silent witnesses with two jarring examples: the 2020 sexual assault on a London train by Rian Johnson and the 2011 murder of Jaina Murray in a Bethesda Lululemon store. These stories showcase how fears and societal norms can paralyze people from taking action. A personal anecdote about a hair-sniffing incident on the Paris Metro further highlights this disturbing trend of public apathy. Through these narratives, we unpack the toxicity of the bystander effect that leaves victims without the help they need.Finally, we delve into the psychology behind intervention decisions. Beginning with the Kitty Genovese case, we explore significant studies that reveal why people often fail to act in emergencies. By breaking down the psychological steps from noticing an event to feeling responsible to intervene, we provide practical advice to empower you to act when it matters most—like directly instructing someone to call 911. Join us for this eye-opening episode as we unpack the complexities of bystander behavior and discuss how to foster a more responsive society.

Send us a textWhy do women double their chances of divorce after winning the lottery, while men are 30% more likely to tie the knot?" Join us as we dig into the surprising and often overlooked effects of financial windfalls on relationships. We explore the statistics and discuss the emotional disconnect that can arise when men focus on material fulfillment at the expense of their relationships. This episode kicks off with a thought-provoking video and an engaging discussion about the different marital outcomes for lottery winners based on gender. Plus, we brainstorm actionable solutions for addressing gender inequalities at work, emphasizing the importance of salary transparency and supportive men advocating for their female colleagues. This episode is a must-listen for anyone looking to understand and navigate the complex landscape of gender dynamics in both their personal and professional lives.

Send us a textWhy do female-dominated fields often require advanced degrees yet offer starting salaries comparable to jobs needing less formal education? In this episode, we promise to uncover the deep-rooted gender disparities in career salaries by examining the educational requirements and initial pay scales of male-dominated and female-dominated professions. From construction workers and plumbers to social workers and teachers, we'll discuss the societal expectations and financial challenges young professionals face in these fields.We'll also walk you through the arduous journey of becoming a licensed social worker, detailing the 3,000 hours of work and 150 hours of supervision needed for an LCSW. Plus, we’ll explore the continuous education, specialized training costs, and the role social media plays in maintaining a professional image. By the end of this episode, you'll have a comprehensive understanding of the financial and societal hurdles in these careers, making it clear just how demanding and undervalued certain professions can be.

Send us a textCan traditional gender roles be the hidden root of toxic relationships?" On this thought-provoking episode of the Toxic Cooking Show, Lindsay McLean and Christopher Patchett, LCSW, wrap up their deep dive into toxic archetypes by shedding light on the often-overlooked concept of "bang maids." These women juggle domestic chores and sexual services without receiving any form of reciprocity. We begin by revisiting our discussions on Pick Me's, N-logs, and Tradwives, underscoring how societal expectations can conceal these harmful dynamics. Through cultural references and recent events, we illustrate how outdated conservative viewpoints subtly infiltrate modern society.Lastly, we tackle the critical issue of addressing consent and gender roles within relationships. We urge men to reflect on and correct their behaviors and expectations, while encouraging women to assert their needs and boundaries. By fostering supportive family environments and advocating for open conversations about compatibility and respect, we aim to help our listeners build healthier, more equitable partnerships. Tune in for an eye-opening and essential discussion on overcoming toxic dynamics and cultivating relationships rooted in mutual understanding.

Send us a textCan the allure of a perfectly baked sourdough starter lead you into the clutches of far-right ideologies? On this episode of the Toxic Cooking Show, we navigate the seemingly wholesome world of the "trad wife" movement, a growing online trend that romanticizes a return to 1950s domesticity and traditional gender roles. Lindsay McClane along with her trusty side kick, Christopher Patchet, LCSW, we unpack how these meticulously crafted videos subtly promote a more sinister agenda, including white supremacism and the glorification of a past that wasn’t as idyllic as it seems.Our conversation doesn't stop at just analyzing the facade of the trad wife lifestyle; we critique its sustainability and the unrealistic promises it makes. We also delve into the darker implications for women who buy into these narratives, often finding themselves in precarious situations with little room for escape. Listen in as we challenge the glossy, curated images of trad wives and expose the dangerous, underlying messages they propagate, encouraging listeners to stay critical and informed.

Send us a textThis week we take a look at giving the spotlight to the "influencers" of social media that, despite having a message of toxic outlooks, continue to have a platform that only grows. We dive deep into Gypsy Rose, (no longer a doctor) Jordan Peterson, and Andrew (tater tot) Tate. We look at the messages they prove and talk about how their toxic messages are not just layered in like an onion, but woven into the people they actually take pride in being. Also we look at those who listen, enjoy, and share their messages even thought the person that they are sharing goes against every fiber of the sharer's beliefs.

Send us a textHave you ever caught yourself vying for attention in a way that makes you cringe in hindsight? Well, we've all been there, and this episode, Lindsay McLean, along with Christopher Patchet, are pulling back the curtain on the social labyrinth of the "pick me girl", right from its roots in the playground dynamics of early girlhood. We share our personal blunders and missteps as a springboard to dissect the 'pick me' phenomenon and the pressure to proclaim how we're 'not like other girls'. Meanwhile, Christopher, as a Licensed Clinical Social Worker, adds depth to the conversation, confirming that this struggle for uniqueness isn't just a female venture but a human one.Through our candid discussion, we peel away at the layers of seeking validation and the traps that come with it, especially as women navigate the treacherous waters of social validation while men wrestle with their own version of this - the 'simp' behavior. We take a hard look at how social media can twist our genuine attempts at self-expression into a desperate sprint for approval and wrap up by holding up a mirror to our own attitudes with a nod to Taylor Swift's lyrics. Get ready to explore the intricate dance of identity, acceptance, and the quest for a uniqueness that sometimes has us teetering on the edge of toxicity. Christopher brings his professional insights into the mix, making this a conversation you won't want to miss.

Send us a textHave you ever witnessed the struggle many men face when it comes to sharing their deepest emotions, even with those they hold dear? This week we have  a revelatory discussion that peels back the layers of why men often bottle up their feelings of sadness or depression. We take a look at factors that set up the stage to repressing men's emotions, from childhood conditioning that equates vulnerability with weakness, to sports and ingrained gender roles reinforcing the facade of stoicism.Together, we navigate the complex landscape of gendered expectations and emotional expression, examining how these societal norms uniquely challenge both men and women. While women are discouraged from showing anger, men face a reality where sadness is often only recognized when it reaches a breaking point, a conditioning that undeniably contributes to the rising problem of men not seeking help for emotional issues. The evolution of therapy and its growing acceptance emerges as a beacon of hope in our conversation, underscoring the critical importance of addressing and maintaining emotional health for all.Wrapping up our deep dive, we critique the damaging stereotypes that shape modern masculinity, including the extreme views of public figures who dismiss men's emotional needs. The stark reality of gendered expectations and their impact on mental health is laid bare as we unpack the ideologies that contribute to a society in which emotional suppression is often mistaken for strength. The episode concludes with a resounding call to action: it's time to dismantle toxic norms and foster an environment where emotional honesty isn't just allowed, but encouraged, for everyone, regardless of gender. Join us in this critical exploration of what it means to be emotionally expressive in a world still grappling with outdated definitions of strength.

Send us a textEver found yourself chuckling at the wisdom buried within Urban Dictionary? That's where we kick things off, unraveling the fabric of 'alpha widows' and 'hypergamy' with humor yet a keen eye on their serious repercussions on modern dating and self-worth. Our latest episode peels back the layers of these potent social dynamics, as we navigate a world where rating human desirability, albeit controversially, can influence our relationships and personal growth.Rounding off, we question whether an obsession with a past high-status partner truly makes one an 'alpha widow,' or if it's an unhelpful label that distracts from deeper relationship issues. Through personal anecdotes, we highlight the importance of intellectual matchmaking, and playfully assess the toxicity of the 'alpha widow' phenomenon on a scale from 'green potato' to 'antifreeze.' It's a candid look at the ties that bind us to our past and the quest for meaningful connections in the tapestry of life.

Send us a textLast week we talked about pretty privilege. This week we look at the total other end of the spectrum, the forgotten fuglies. Why are we, your lovely hosts, coining the term "the forgotten fuglies"? Well, apparently, unlike the pretty people that have all the research on their mental health, social ranks, and acceptabilities in the world, ugly people, well, they are kinda forgotten about by even psychologists. So to all those who are going to the bars on their own without attention, and to those sitting at home with zero messages on your dating apps, we see you.

Send us a textPretty privilege brings nothing but advantages to someone who has conventional attractiveness, right? There are the advantages of free drinks, easier to find a partner. But, with pretty privilege comes the unprivileges of unwanted attention, and over-looked mental health problems. This week we dive into the good, the bad, and the ugly (no pun intended) of what all is included in pretty privilege, and see where it falls on our scale of toxicity.

Send us a textA wonderful night at a father daughter dance. Dad gets dressed up to take his daughter out for dinner. Daughter puts on a nice dress to spend time with her father.  How could we possibly add this as an  ingredient to our toxic soup? Well, how about making the theme of the entire night on the daughter's virginity?  That's right! Purity Balls where you take a girl going through puberty, confused about the changes in her body, and the changes in her thoughts, and make her take an oath to remain a virgin until marriage. This week we discuss how this affects the daughter, what language is being used to separate how we look at virginity on boys and girls, and where the hell this idea even came from.

Send us a textGaslighting, it has become one of those terms that is starting to lose meaning due to everyone calling out gaslighting one everything. If someone lies. People calls out that it is gaslighting. If someone is being manipulative. People calls out that it is gaslighting. However, actual gaslighting is much much more serious and we will explore what gaslighting actually is, where the term cam from, and the difference between gaslighting and other terms people mistaken gaslighting to be.

Send us a textLooking at the friend zone. What is it? Where did the name come from? We look at this, and more importantly, can the friend zone be harmful? and if yes to whom can this be harmful for? The one who is zoned? The one who is zoning? both? Let's dive into the toxic meanings that is the friend zone.

Send us a textMoving away from the toxic Alpha male to the opposite end of the spectrum. We talk about "the simp". Are they just the nice guys? Where did the name come from? How do these Simps affect the people around them and how do they affect themselves?

Send us a textThis week we discuss women trends that have been featured on tiktok including A4 challenge, and goldfish in the collarbone (yuck) challenge. We dive into body images over the years from the tube like body of the flapper girls in the 1920's to the present "thigh gap" and "hip dips".

Send us a textLast week we talked about three different cases that lead to murder. But where is the blame placed? Does it go to the me engaging in the toxic behaviors, or does the blame go to the women that are thriving off the toxic behaviors.