S1E8 - Making others excited to talk to you and 100x your engagement with Neville Medhora

Friendship Futurism

Oct 11 2022 • 55 mins

Neville and I chat about how to 100x your engagement in online communities, specific tactics you can implement to make other people want to talk to you at conferences and parties, strategic risk taking when sneaking into events, and how to resist propaganda.

I credit a lot of my writing talent to Neville's mentorship; he is the one of the most talented writers and communicators I know. Neville runs Copywriting Course, a paid community with over 1,000 members learning how to write well and sell like hell.

1:00 Jumping out of a plane into an active volcano https://copywritingcourse.com/test-death/

2:40 How do you manage a paid community? Kopywriting Kourse: https://copywritingcourse.com/

Facebook vs. custom forums

4:30 90-9-1 rule https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/1%25_rule

How do you get lurkers to be more active in a community?

8:00 How do you get regular contributors to become super enthusiastic posters?

9:10 90-9-1 rule as applied to friendships Why do some friends end up being 1 and others end up being 90?

10:45 Getting to know your neighbour

12:15 How do you make friends if you are homeless?

14:00 Coworking as a way to get to know strangers from the internet

The internet as a way to better connect with people, compared to a random person at a bar

16:30 Finding people who intersect in both geographic and intellectual space.

18:00 Going to parties where it's all new people

18:35 What have you learned about sneaking into parties?

Social engineering and tactics to meet new strangers at parties

How specifically to introduce yourself at a party

How to bootstrap yourself into a party where you don't know anyone

Having a goal for what you want out of a gathering, when you are an attendee

23:45 How do you apply social engineering to your life?

Specific tactics to talk to new people, inviting them to events, matching someone's energy level

25:10 How do you come up with creative ideas and opportunities? How can more people develop that skill?

How to think about risk

Calculating the prior probability—what are the baseline statistics around how likely you will fail?

27:00 How to be okay with risk?

29:45 How do you resist other peoples' good persuasion skills?

33:10 How to make maximum money in minimum time

Exaggerated advertising and copywriting

36:00 Debunking scams

37:00 Calling something a "scam" as classism, as someone without advantages has an opportunity to relate to someone who can speak to their struggles as a doorway into learning more about business

The closest people you can relate with when you didn’t grow up in a privileged background

39:00 Neville's tips for awesome in person events?

40:45 Surprisingly easier than you think to speak at a conference PaperCall https://www.papercall.io

42:00 Going to conferences to watch the talks versus hanging out in the lobby to meet people

43:15 Dividing your personal time between meeting new people and spending time deepening your existing friendships

45:00 Set goals: say hello to 5 people, and don’t go back to your hotel room until you do.

How to get out of a conversation you don’t want to be in?

46:10 Neville’s secret thoughts about friendship

Always have a plan on what to do, so you can invite them to it afterwards

Always getting someone’s contact information

Planning events pretty often, so you always have an open invite for new friends

49:00 Order $200 of appetizers at a hotel bar/restaurant, buy your own drink, and get a relationship with the hotel on a Tuesday

51:30 Why not to hire a personal chef?

Check out the Copywriting Course at https://copywritingcourse.com

Follow Neville on Twitter: https://twitter.com/nevmed

Follow Bill Mei via email: https://billmei.net/email

Follow Bill Mei via Twitter: https://twitter.com/billmeidotnet

Visit friendshipfuturism.com for show notes, events, and bonus blog posts