Black and White and Gold

We sincerely hope you are enjoying this episode in comfy jammies and are making lovely memories with family and friends. …but if not, we hope you have peace anyway. We love your guts, and we’ll be back with full episodes on Season 2 in early February. More info to come. Book Links to purchase (affiliate links) and link directly to the Pantsuit Politics Substack (but for real…worth a follow).I Think You’re Wrong (But I’m Listening) by Sarah Stewart Holland and Beth SilversPantsuit PoliticsCrucial Conversations - Our next book club book…get a head start! This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit blackandwhiteandgold.substack.com

Thanks for reading Black and White and Gold! Subscribe for free to receive new posts and support our work.I Think You’re Wrong (But I’m Listening) by Sarah Stewart Holland and Beth SilversPantsuit PoliticsCrucial Conversations - Our next book club book…get a head start! This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit blackandwhiteandgold.substack.com

It’s hard to overstate the mood swings felt on the journey of this episode. Maybe some of you can relate? Join us as we talk about nuance through the lens of religion, covid, and politics. Here’s to hoping this minefield helps some of you process too. 🤟🏼The video referenced about John McCain: Come be social with us:instagram.com/blackandwhiteandgoldblackandwhiteandgold.substack.com This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit blackandwhiteandgold.substack.com

Many apologies if this is a duplicate post for you…we’re still working out the kinks over here, and *maybe* we figured out the issue? Regardless, this episode is a good one…hope you stay tuned!Growing up in a high-demand religion and teen pregnancy don’t usually mix well. Join us as we talk with Amy and Brenna about how they (and their family!) navigated this unexpected life event. We’ll talk about what it looked like for them, how they and family members handled the news, what NOT to do, what helped, what hurt, and what they’ve learned along the way.There’s a little something to learn for everyone.Follow Amy and Brenna on social media, and stay tuned for Brenna’s upcoming podcast:Brenna's InstagramBrenna's TikTokAmy's InstagramAmy's TikTokThanks for reading Black and White and Gold! Subscribe for free to receive new posts and support our work.Or join the conversation on Instagram and subscribe for updates and all the things on Substack. Either way, we love your face. 🖤🤍💛 This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit blackandwhiteandgold.substack.com

We love your guts. We’re so grateful for you. Enjoy the weekend the best you’re able to, and we will be back with another convo next week. Book Club Deets:We will be meeting Wednesday, December 4, at 7pm through the link here: https://us06web.zoom.us/meeting/register/tZIlceCtpz0rEtELzgKGvJ-qLDL87fhlsXUh#/registrationWe'll be reading I Think You're Wrong, (But I'm Listening) (this is an affiliate link) by Beth Silvers and Sarah Stewart-Holland, and we're excited to create this FREE opportunity to engage with others discuss important topics and skills that can help us be better friends family and citizens.This book club will be Zoom style, so anybody, anywhere in the world can participate. We'll see you soon.Thanks for reading Black and White and Gold! Subscribe for free to receive new posts and support our work. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit blackandwhiteandgold.substack.com

Ahhhh…The Holidays, right? It's a beautiful time for gathering as family and friends to celebrate [fill in the blank] day. However, "holidays" are seen through different lenses by each of us. Some holidays may be difficult to process or get-though because of past experiences, perceived missed opportunities, strained relationships, or complicated history.Thanks for reading Black and White and Gold! Subscribe for free to receive new posts and support our work.In today's episode, we meander a bit through reasons why holidays may be difficult for people, how we can hold space for those who struggle, and discuss tips on how to care for yourself so you can have the best experience possible, but not without having a discussion on Festivus. Though holidays can provide opportunities to gather with loved ones and enjoy special traditions, they don’t always pan out that way…so we hope you find value in today's discussion.What is your favorite holiday tradition? We can't wait to hear from you in the comment section—with your knowledge of Anna Howard Shaw. 😘Link to Calm article we discussed: https://www.calm.com/blog/holiday-stress#:~:text=Holiday%20stress%20can%20take%20its,to%20a%20party%20or%20two.Book Club December 4, 2024 via Zoom. Register here, and find all the fun details here. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit blackandwhiteandgold.substack.com

Nothing like a volatile political season to bring out the best in everyone…areweright? As social media feels like a literal dumpster fire mixed with the worst in humanity sometimes, we are pulling at the threads of being wrong…and how it feels exactly like being right. We’re pretty sure we’re right about it too. Are you?Show notes:Join us for BOOK CLUB! Register here for our conversation about I Think You’re Wrong (But I’m Listening) by Sarah Stewart Holland and Beth Silvers. We will meet via Zoom on Wednesday, November 20, 2025 at 7pm Pacific. Please join us!Video of the man running away: https://www.ted.com/talks/kathryn_schulz_on_being_wrong/transcript?Thanks for reading Black and White and Gold! Subscribe for free to receive new posts and support our work.Thanks for reading Black and White and Gold! This post is public so feel free to share it. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit blackandwhiteandgold.substack.com

The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives has created quiiiiite a stir…mostly among people who are somehow affiliated with the church in their lives. But the opinions? Oof. They’re ALLLL over the place. We chat a bit about that, and then start a discussion with each other about some of the questions being brought up that weren’t directly stated. We would love to hear your thoughts on it, and any of the other commentary that you want to share in our chat thread. Find that here:Links to some of the things we discuss here:https://www.usatoday.com/story/life/health-wellness/2024/09/19/mormon-women-speak-out-secret-lives-mormon-wives/75192755007/https://www.thedailybeast.com/obsessed/hulus-secret-lives-of-mormon-wives-is-a-horrific-tv-abominationhttps://universe.byu.edu/2020/06/30/caffeine-opinions-vary-greatly-in-lds-culture/#:~:text=While%20Uchtdorf%20didn't%20name%20the%20soda%20directly%2C,inferred%20that%20it%20was%20a%20caffeinated%20drink https://www.google.com/search?q=new+fsoy+pamphlet+lds&oq=new+fsoy+pamphlet+lds&gs_lcrp=EgZjaHJvbWUyBggAEEUYOTIJCAEQIRgKGKABMgkIAhAhGAoYoAEyCQgDECEYChigATIJCAQQIRgKGKABMgkIBRAhGAoYoAEyBwgGECEYqwLSAQg5MjI5ajBqN6gCALACAA&sourceid=chrome&ie=UTF-8https://www.google.com/search?q=the+good+samaritan+priest+and&oq=the+good+samaritan+priest+and+&gs_lcrp=EgZjaHJvbWUyBggAEEUYOTIICAEQABgWGB4yCAgCEAAYFhgeMg0IAxAAGIYDGIAEGIoFMg0IBBAAGIYDGIAEGIoFMg0IBRAAGIYDGIAEGIoFMg0IBhAAGIYDGIAEGIoFMg0IBxAAGIYDGIAEGIoFMgoICBAAGIAEGKIEMgoICRAAGIAEGKIE0gEINTc0NGowajeoAgCwAgA&sourceid=chrome&ie=UTF-8https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/ensign/2008/12/the-energy-drink-epidemic?lang=engJoin us for our Book Club where we discuss I Think You’re Wrong (But I’m Listening) by Beth Silvers and Sarah Stewart Holland. Purchase the book here,Thanks for reading Black and White and Gold! Subscribe for free to receive new posts and support my work.Register to join the conversation about PART TWO here (November 20 at 7pm Pacific). After registration, you’ll receive a link to join the Zoom meeting in your email. Can’t wait to see you!Thanks for reading Black and White and Gold! This post is public so feel free to share it with your friends and family. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit blackandwhiteandgold.substack.com

Is there anything scarier that talking about politics? For some, definitely not…so since it’s our last episode before Election Day AND Halloween, it seemed like a fitting thing to jump in to. But we’re gonna do it in a surprisingly neutral way. We will NOT tell you how to vote, but if you need a bit of encouragement on where to go to get helpful information, we’ve gotchu. And regardless of your affiliation, you’re welcome here. You just have to be willing to hold space for other views—that’s non-negotiable. Love your buns. But also, get your butt out and vote. Thanks for reading Black and White and Gold! This post is public so feel free to share it.Links we referenced: https://gop.com/about-our-party/https://prod-static.gop.com/media/RNC2024-Platform.pdf?_gl=1*21raw6*_gcl_au*MTc4MjMxMDgxMy4xNzMwMDgwMDY1&_ga=2.245249927.365673058.1730080066-1186767565.1730080066https://downloads.frcaction.org/EF/EF18H05.pdfhttps://democrats.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/08/FINAL-MASTER-PLATFORM.pdfhttps://www.isidewith.com/political-quizhttps://www.opencampaign.com/quizhttps://www.theadvocates.org/quiz/ https://www.isidewith.com/elections/2024-presidential-quizhttps://www.pewresearch.org/politics/quiz/political-typology/Thanks for reading Black and White and Gold! Subscribe for free to receive new posts stay up to date This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit blackandwhiteandgold.substack.com

Kelly is BACK! This time, we have an open conversation about pregnancy loss, pregnancy, parenting, and re-parenting ourselves. Trigger warning: We love you and want the best for you! Please only listen if you are in a position to listen to this topic (pregnancy and child loss) from a safe space. BOOK CLUB! Join us for our book club whilst we read I Think You’re Wrong (But I’m Listening) by Sarah Stewart Holland and Beth Silvers. Join us for Part 2 on November 20 at 7pm Pacific. Register (for FREE) here.Thanks for reading Black and White and Gold! Subscribe for free to receive new posts and support my work. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit blackandwhiteandgold.substack.com

Part 3 of our relationship series ends with us saying a bunch of big words, but words that changed the game for us. If things like “differentiation,” “enmeshment,” and “co-create” are new-ish to you, hopefully there’s something good in this listen for you to take to your own relationships. Join the chat, and let’s talk about what we’re learning together!Join us for our Book Club where we discuss I Think You’re Wrong (But I’m Listening) by Beth Silvers and Sarah Stewart Holland. Purchase the book here,Thanks for reading Black and White and Gold! Subscribe for free to receive new posts and support my work.Register to join us the conversation about PART ONE here and the conversation about PART TWO here. After registration, you’ll receive a link to join the Zoom meeting(s) in your email. We will meet twice, once on October 23 and 7pm Pacific to discuss part one, and once on November 20 at 7pm Pacific to discuss part 2.Some links to a few of the articles, etc. we discuss in the episode:https://www.crucible4points.com/crucible-four-points-balance/ https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Enmeshmenthttps://www.simplypsychology.org/attachment.htmlhttps://psychcentral.com/relationships/why-you-need-a-strong-sense-of-self-and-how-to-boost-ithttps://www.thebowencenter.org/differentiation-of-self This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit blackandwhiteandgold.substack.com

There’s a lot of discussion about relationships and vulnerability, but it seems that men have a bit of a bad rap in this particular arena. But what does culture AND the women in their lives have to do with it? Let’s chat about whether or not we want men to even BE vulnerable, and if so, how do we encourage it?Join us for our Book Club where we discuss I Think You’re Wrong (But I’m Listening) by Beth Silvers and Sarah Stewart Holland. Purchase the book here,Thanks for reading Black and White and Gold! Subscribe for free to receive new posts and support my work.Register to join us the conversation about PART ONE here and the conversation about PART TWO here. After registration, you’ll receive a link to join the Zoom meeting(s) in your email. We will meet twice, once on October 23 and 7pm Pacific to discuss part one, and once on November 20 at 7pm Pacific to discuss part 2.SHOW NOTES: Brene Brown’s TEDx talk about shame: https://dictionary.cambridge.org/us/dictionary/english/emasculationhttps://www.huffpost.com/entry/violence-against-women_b_1959746https://www.reddit.com/r/AskFeminists/comments/18slkug/thoughts_on_the_word_emasculate/https://onbeing.org/blog/jonathan-p-higgins-what-does-it-mean-to-be-a-man/https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2020/nov/13/what-does-it-mean-to-be-a-man-reader-responses#:~:text=I%20can%20cook%2C%20clean%2C%20buy,more%20open%20and%20fulfilling%20fashion https://www.themix.org.uk/your-body/mens-health/what-does-it-mean-to-be-a-man-in-2018-29605.html#:~:text=It%20means%20not%20being%20afraid,and%20uplifting%20those%20around%20you.%E2%80%9Dhttps://www.utdailybeacon.com/opinion/columns/making-of-man-what-does-it-mean-to-be-a-man/article_1a9f5836-2068-11ec-abd1-f3615d73f13d.htmlhttps://scholarsarchive.byu.edu/byusq/vol45/iss3/1/#:~:text=Most%20Mormons%20have%20heard%20of,from%20the%20effects%20of%20exposure https://brycox.com/lds/BryCox-SweetwaterRescue.pdf https://scholarsarchive.byu.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi?article=3783&context=byusq  This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit blackandwhiteandgold.substack.com

Why is it that when men are good friends, we have to make it weird? It becomes a “bromance” instead of a friendship. Statistically speaking, the vast majority of men don’t have friends they rely on for emotional support, and we’re gonna chat about it.Links to some of the ideas we referenced:https://www.google.com/search?q=statistics+on+male+friend+relationships&sca_esv=7bed0de0dada41c5&ei=YdDUZqupIICgkPIPjefnsAM&oq=statistics+on+male+frelationships&gs_lp=Egxnd3Mtd2l6LXNlcnAiIXN0YXRpc3RpY3Mgb24gbWFsZSBmcmVsYXRpb25zaGlwcyoCCAEyChAhGKABGMMEGAoyChAhGKABGMMEGApI0SBQuQ1YuQ1wAXgBkAEAmAHBAaABwQGqAQMwLjG4AQHIAQD4AQGYAgKgAssBwgIKEAAYsAMY1gQYR5gDAIgGAZAGB5IHAzEuMaAHigQ&sclient=gws-wiz-serphttps://www.cnn.com/2022/11/29/health/men-friendships-wellness/index.html#:~:text=Characterizing%20the%20gender%20of%20these,children%20grow%20up%20to%20struggle.%E2%80%9Dhttps://www.latimes.com/lifestyle/newsletter/2023-10-10/more-than-1-in-7-men-have-no-close-friends-the-way-we-socialize-boys-is-to-blame-group-therapy#:~:text=Thirty%20years%20ago%2C%20a%20majority,a%20fivefold%20increase%20since%201990 https://www.americansurveycenter.org/why-mens-social-circles-are-shrinking/https://www.newyorker.com/books/page-turner/ask-an-academic-the-secrets-of-boyshttps://www.goodreads.com/quotes/8144131-when-you-judge-yourself-for-needing-help-you-judge-those Don’t forget we’re holding a book club! Purchase the book here (amazon affiliate link) or snag it from your local library. We’ll hold our first discussion October 23, details to come soon. REGISTER HERE.We’d love to have you chat with us on the topics we discuss. Join us here for more conversation:If you’d like to receive news and posts directly to your email, subscribe here. MUCH more to come!Thanks for reading Black and White and Gold! Subscribe for free to receive new posts and support our work. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit blackandwhiteandgold.substack.com

At the end of National Suicide Prevention Month, we felt it important to talk about this really hard topic with someone who is doing what she can to alchemize her grief.Lacey is the founder of Play to Stay that raises money to support the mental health and raise funds to help prevent suicides in the community. In this conversation, we get real about this topic and discuss it from many angles.Play to Stay websiteArticle about the first Play to Stay tournament: https://www.heraldextra.com/sanpete-county/2021/oct/27/play-to-stay-softball-tournament-aims-to-increase-suicide-awareness/Emergency resources: 911 Crisis services:988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline: 988lifeline.org If you or someone you know is struggling or in crisis, help is available. Call or text 988 or chat 988lifeline.org. Veterans, press 1 when calling. Crisis Text Line Text TALK to 741-741 to text with a trained crisis counselor from the Crisis Text Line for free, 24/7 Veterans Crisis Line Send a text to 838255 Vets4Warriors SAMHSA Treatment Referral Hotline (Substance Abuse) 1-800-662-HELP (4357) https://www.samhsa.gov/mental-health/suicideRAINN National Sexual Assault Hotline 1-800-656-HOPE (4673) National Teen Dating Abuse Helpline 1-866-331-9474 The Trevor Project 1-866-488-7386 www.thetrevorproject.orgNAMI- National Alliance for Mental Illness 800-950-6264 or text ‘helpline” to 62640Suicide Prevention Awareness Center (SPAC): https://sprc.org/American Foundation for Suicide Prevention (AFSP): https://afsp.org/The Jason Foundation: https://jasonfoundation.com/ This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit blackandwhiteandgold.substack.com

Language and words are endlessly fascinating. Humans literally make up combinations of sounds to describe events, concepts, thoughts, emotions, and things, and then we use those words to communicate with each other. Every generation adapts and adopts language to fit the time, and we’re super intrigued by it. Today, we manage to discuss all sorts of language, including swears/cuss words, without saying anything that will be flagged as explicit. We’re magic that way. Can’t wait to hear what you think! This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit blackandwhiteandgold.substack.com

Membership in a high demand religion creates endless opportunities for service and sacrifice. For those of you who may be familiar with such a lifestyle, we imagine you'll relate heavily to this one. For those who don't have first-hand experience here, it's an inside look at some of the complexities that make us grow or perhaps stunt our growth in the struggle. Looking at choice and agency through the lens of serving in your community can help us see places we may overlook to bring more peace and fulfillment into our own lives. We'd love to hear your feedback! Join us on Instagram and be part of the conversation. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit blackandwhiteandgold.substack.com

In a world/culture where money, power, and violence reign supreme, the human body in media is sure an interesting study.In this episode, we discuss a Substack article written by Celeste Davis discussing the interesting connection between sex and violence portrayed in pop culture. We would love to hear from you about your current intake of media! Does any of this resonate for you, and how? Click here to join the conversation on InstagramClick here to read the Substack article by Celeste Davis we reference in this episode. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit blackandwhiteandgold.substack.com

What started out as us talking about the threads that originally brought us together shifted seismically into a real-time unpacking of some previously-unknown struggles I didn't see coming. Our story, though purely ours, is not unique in our religious culture. Many of us stifle ourselves and stunt our own growth, even though it doesn't feel authentic to ourselves. Learning to live in integrity is a process that continues to be learned each day, and here's a layer of me...working on that process. https://instagram.com/blackandwhiteandgold Also...we're working on shifting into a Substack space--keep an eye out for info to come. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit blackandwhiteandgold.substack.com

What kind of transition takes place in your life when you don't know where you came from until you are an adult with children of your own? What growth occurs during the process?Our first episode with a guest we chat about so many things in her unique journey that can help all of us uncover a little bit of the beauty in digging into our roots and discovering parts of ourselves that were there all along.The book Kelly references is called Women Who Run with the Wolves, by Dr. Clarissa Pinkola Estes and can be purchased through our affiliate link (we may get a tiny portion of the sale at no additional cost to you when you purchase through this link) here. Join the conversation on Instagram! This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit blackandwhiteandgold.substack.com

Come along as we discuss the differences in some words that often get mistaken for synonyms. We'll learn the difference so that we can communicate in a better way with each other.The website we referenced for some of the definitions we quoted on the episode: thepornconversation.orgTaylor Petrie Tabernacles of Clay (this is an affiliate link):https://amzn.to/4fGWwgKWebsite for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints where we discussed some of the wording on policy:https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/topics/transgender?lang=eng https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/manual/general-handbook/38-church-policies-and-guidelines?lang=eng&id=title_number118-p836#title_number118 Find us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/blackandwhiteandgold This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit blackandwhiteandgold.substack.com