PODCAST

The Peggy Mount Calamity Hour

iporlemedia

A casual cultural critique of vintage television, where Britain’s best-loved battleaxe is never far from our minds...

The Spaceman And King Arthur
But lo, something is in the air! The  evenings are lighter, the breeze is warmer and the studio at MountPeg Towers might even be getting closer to its annual clean (don't hold your breath. Actually, holding your breath in there might be an idea). Yes, spring has sprung and drink will be drunk as Doctor Velvet and Blackout presage the new series of The Peggy Mount Calamity Hour with a quintet of special episodes focusing on big screen entertainment; albeit viewed on a small screen... The first cinematic gem to stagger through the mists of time is Disney's 1979 live-action historical sci-fi farce, The Spaceman and King Arthur (aka Unidentified Flying Oddball), with a welter of British talent and perhaps more sauce than one might expect for this sort of dish. Just how loose can The Science be in a script, before it can no longer be legally classified as science-fiction? Just how tense can an auditorium of accompanying adults become as a film tries to balance Arthurian legend hat-tips and a running joke about bongo mags? And which of our impressionable hosts was brainwashed by the film into belting bits of old metal with a hammer in order to make magnets? Our Feature Presentation is one way to find out... The Peggy Mount Calamity Hour is a free podcast from iPorle Media, which holds production copyright. Opinions and recollections expressed are not to be taken as fact. The title and credit music is by Doctor Velvet. Audio segments from television programmes are presented for review and informational purposes only under fair use, and no ownership of these is claimed or implied by this show. Email enquiries to peggymountpod@gmail.com
3d ago
43 mins
Take The High Road/Family Fortunes Hogmanay Special
OCH! Well help our boabs and jing our crivvens, The Peggy Mount Calamity Hour finds itself queuing once more at Berwick's passport office in an annual pilgrimage northward for the New Year's Eve celebrations, where all Blackout, Doctor Velvet and Ozzy Bognops have to declare is some pretty firm Opinions™ on the television of years past... Their first-foot is a trip to the rural majesty of Glendarroch, where domestic strife and highfalutin corporate angst stand shoulder-to-shoulder. Will auld acquaintances be forgot in time for the bells to ring in the new year? The only way to find out is to Take The High Road. Then it's a rest from All The Drama and onto All The Fun (or a percentage thereof); no festive season would be complete without a visit from Les Dennis, here this time to host a hooting Hogmanay Special of Family Fortunes as he pits two Scottish clans against one another in a survey-analysis to the death. Does every croft North Of The Border have a special room where all the sound effects are kept? Do ITV's gameshow booking department only have the phone number of one village hall in Scotland? And how long can Blackout keep doing that accent before half his family disown (or claymore) him? Make it YOUR New Year's resolution to hit PLAY and find out... (NOTE: If you want to count down to midnight with us in the show, start the podcast at 22:49:04. That's forty nine minutes and four seconds past ten o'clock at night. Smashing.) The Peggy Mount Calamity Hour is a free podcast from iPorle Media, which holds production copyright. Opinions and recollections expressed are not to be taken as fact. The title and credit music is by Doctor Velvet. Audio segments from television programmes are presented for review and informational purposes only under fair use, and no ownership of these is claimed or implied by this show. Email enquiries to peggymountpod@gmail.com
Dec 31 2021
1 hr 12 mins
Ludwig/Christmas Night With The StarsT. Bag‘s Christmas Turkey/ Cilla Black‘s Christmas
As dear Laird McMullington of Kintyre once slaved 'pon his bureau to note: "The moon is right; the dander's up; we're watching channel three tonight; there's absolute hell on". And as cumbersome as those lyrics may appear in their written form, it's worth noting that his same ditty goes on to employ the carefully chosen libretto "ding dong, ding dong, ding dong, ding ooh ooooh". So y'know, you take your cultural insight where you can find it... Back on terra iracundia however, messrs Velvet, Bognops and Blackout inflict upon themselves a duology of televisual flagellation from the light channel in the form of T.Bag's Christmas Turkey and Cilla Black's Christmas - two vintage yuletide offerings which evidently did their very utmost to fly the flag for Scrooge-like militant atheism in the living rooms of children and adults alike. So at least everyone's catered for. Which is the meaning of Christmas, we suppose. Did our Lady Of Perpetual Outrage Dame Pegatha Mountbatten have an inadvertent hand in Thames Television's resounding lack of franchise-renewal? Is a heart-melting sense of festive poignancy overdone by depicting Baroness Cillosis Blackjack as some old lady who sits around the house waiting for guests who never turn up and talking at the television? And is it just true that no good terrestrial Christmas programming has ever been broadcast on a channel which has adverts? You'd certainly be forgiven for thinking so... The Peggy Mount Calamity Hour is a free podcast from iPorle Media, which holds production copyright. Opinions and recollections expressed are not to be taken as fact. The title and credit music is by Doctor Velvet. Audio segments from television programmes are presented for review and informational purposes only under fair use, and no ownership of these is claimed or implied by this show. Email enquiries to peggymountpod@gmail.com
Dec 17 2021
51 mins
Watch: The Nativity/To The Manor Born
Christmas may only come once a year, but The Peggy Mount Calamity Hour presents an unholy trinity of seasonal specials to keep you warm during the darkest month. Doctor Velvet and Blackout invite Ozzy Bognops round for yuletide reminiscence, irreverent chat and lashings of booze as they delve into the televisual archive and summon the ghosts of Christmas past... Selecting from the festive kids' menu our trio draw the curtains, flip out the screen-glare shields and brace for a dead leg and an all-expenses-paid trip to Bethlehem in Watch. Then it's back in good old blighty where everything is refined, restrained and furiously beige as tradition meets aspiration in To The Manor Born. Will there really be Peace On Earth when a TV presenter ends up stranded in Television Centre alone with a pair of scissors, two cameras and four hundred empty shoeboxes? Will there be goodwill toward men when a prime-time Christmas Special is commissioned seemingly in the second week of December and with the budget of a clip-show? AND WILL THERE BE ANY PORT LEFT? Crack open the eggnog and hit Play to find out... The Peggy Mount Calamity Hour is a free podcast from iPorle Media, which holds production copyright. Opinions and recollections expressed are not to be taken as fact. The title and credit music is by Doctor Velvet. Audio segments from television programmes are presented for review and informational purposes only under fair use, and no ownership of these is claimed or implied by this show. Email enquiries to peggymountpod@gmail.com
Dec 10 2021
1 hr 6 mins
Buck Rogers in the 25th Century/Duty Free
It's all go round at MountPeg Towers as Doctor Velvet and Blackout limber up to slip in a quick one before Christmas (quiet at the back), and end up rolling out the welcome mat for Simon and Ken from The Exton Moss Experiment podcast. Because what could be more self indulgent than two middle-aged men mulling over the slightly bitter taste of eighties reminiscence, than doubling that up for a foursome? (really, keep it down) First up, the boys are out of this world in excitement over Buck Rogers' 25th Century romp on the Planet Of The Amazon Women, before coming right back down to earth (and hard) with some Duty Free as the San Remo Hotel gets a bit of extra oomph when a famous - and flirty - guest arrives. All of this might sound sexy, but unfortunately the only sauce on offer here is the hard liquor (some of it positively medicinal) required to sit through it all. Is there a German word for that feeling when the future looks way cheaper than the present when it's filmed in the past? Is there a Spanish word for the year-on-year diminishing returns of a massively successful but oddly era-specific sitcom? And is there any word at all for the incandescent umbrage one feels at being the only person in the room to have actively enjoyed what everyone's just sat through? The play-button will reveal all... The Peggy Mount Calamity Hour is a free podcast from iPorle Media, which holds production copyright. Opinions and recollections expressed are not to be taken as fact. The title and credit music is by Doctor Velvet. Audio segments from television programmes are presented for review and informational purposes only under fair use, and no ownership of these is claimed or implied by this show. Email enquiries to peggymountpod@gmail.com
Dec 3 2021
1 hr 14 mins
Scooby Doo, Where Are You!/Tales Of The Unexpected
Gather round! It is time once more to bob your apples, carve some pumpkins and get them treats tricked, as our cauldron is stirred for a generous and potentially lethal helping of the home-brewed Peggy Mount Calamity Hour's Hallow'een Special! Yes, there's just time before the Feast Of All Saints to get your fangs stuck into a couple of spooky morsels, whether it's out of hunger for untold riches, long-sought vengeance or just a liverwurst and ice cream sandwich. The moonlit streets of California are our first stop-off, as a gang of young paranormal investigators solve the riddle of the tombs as best they can whilst also enquiring as to the present whereabouts of Scooby-Doo. And then it's a short train ride into East Anglia, where mirth, merriment and magic combine to mask the more sinister intentions of Derek Jacobi's Stranger In Town... Which battle-attired porcine-fronted hostelry in Norfolk finds itself the unwitting focus of an unsolicited endorsement campaign? Is there no end to the lengths to which some ingeniously theatrical criminals will go, when a simple night-time ram raid and/or sniper rifle would probably get the same job done more efficiently? And come on, is that *really* not what we expected? Press Play to find out, if you dare... The Peggy Mount Calamity Hour is a free podcast from iPorle Media, which holds production copyright. Opinions and recollections expressed are not to be taken as fact. The title and credit music is by Doctor Velvet. Audio segments from television programmes are presented for review and informational purposes only under fair use, and no ownership of these is claimed or implied by this show. Email enquiries to peggymountpod@gmail.com
Oct 29 2021
1 hr 10 mins
Seaside Special/Summertime Special
Because we are nothing if not the guests you cannot get shot of at the end of a party, ten episodes was never going to be enough tomfoolery and so we are proud to present the first of this year's seasonal shenanigans in the bumper Peggy Mount Calamity Hour Summertime Special Summertime Special... First up we're off to deepest darkest Poole in to watch Peter Powell and Cilla Black master their ring in the BBC's big top for 1979's Seaside Special. Then as we salve our sunburn with ice lollies and saltwater, there's just time to take the land-train round to Bournemouth's BIC where Michael Barrymore is pleased as punch to present his 1987 Summertime Special. How much of a programme's content can you feasibly compile from VT footage, given that you've already dragged nine hundred people into a specially erected tent to watch a handful of the only acts who were all available on the same night? How much of a programme's content can you realistcally film when the cast, crew and audience of a 10,000 seat theatre are all ankle-deep in sequins? And how much of a programme's content will ever make the hosts of this podcast content? Pour one more sangria while the sun's still shining and find out... The Peggy Mount Calamity Hour is a free podcast from iPorle Media, which holds production copyright. Opinions and recollections expressed are not to be taken as fact. The title and credit music is by Doctor Velvet. Audio segments from television programmes are presented for review and informational purposes only under fair use, and no ownership of these is claimed or implied by this show. Email enquiries to peggymountpod@gmail.com
Aug 27 2021
1 hr 24 mins
Knightmare/QED
What a ride it's been, you lovely lot, as The Peggy Mount Calamity Hour has stopped off at each year of the 1980s to sample memory-stirring merriments and televisual treats. And there's one more riddling foray to be had before we pull the curtain and hope the theatre doesn't inexplicably catch fire... This week it's 1989 and THE FUTURE™ of immersive gaming is in its absolute prime as we don a horned helmet and stumble around an empty room while our friends enjoy themselves in Knightmare. Any danger is all virtual of course, so safe in that knowledge we relax to put the kettle on and watch a bit of telly. And it's getting a bit stuffy in here, so we'll see if we can make it as far as opening the window before suffering A Case Of Spontaneous Human Combustion. Is Gavin Gillespie's brand of bawdy, working-class rhetoric really suitable for Friday afternoon sword-and-sorcery broadcasting when there are children watching? How many scientists arguing over the possibility of involuntary auto-incineration would it have taken to assuage the permanently-on flammability fears of three youngsters in the 1980s? And for the last ruddy time, does anybody want an apple? Take one step forward, and find out...   The Peggy Mount Calamity Hour is a free podcast from iPorle Media, which holds production copyright. Opinions and recollections expressed are not to be taken as fact. The title and credit music is by Doctor Velvet. Audio segments from television programmes are presented for review and informational purposes only under fair use, and no ownership of these is claimed or implied by this show. Email enquiries to peggymountpod@gmail.com
Aug 20 2021
51 mins
Doctor Who/Punishment Without Crime
It feels like it's been YEARS since we last relaxed in the company of the very reason we're all gathered around the wireless today (it's been eight weeks, in fact), and so The Peggy Mount Calamity Hour goes all Agadoo as it bends over backwards, pulls out the stops and pushes out the boat... This week it's 1988 and we find ourselves in the mood for a double Pegging (okay, quiet at the back), as we pick up a flyer for The Greatest Show In The Galaxy only to find Dame Peggatha Mountbatten on a stall outside selling rice pudding and cold sick served in half a pineapple. Then we're so incensed about this, we find ourselves on trial for the things we only imagined doing in Ray Bradbury's Punishment Without Crime. It turns out Peggy's the judge, so we're definitely going down (really please, calm down). Could absolutely any dystopian wilderness be improved with the judicial placement of an absolutely incendiary P.Mount? Could R.Bradbury's office be improved with the judicial placement of a cleaner? And is the ninth episode of the series really the best time for D.Velvet and B.Out to be bringing in a new outlandish character? Well, the jury's still out... The Peggy Mount Calamity Hour is a free podcast from iPorle Media, which holds production copyright. Opinions and recollections expressed are not to be taken as fact. The title and credit music is by Doctor Velvet. Audio segments from television programmes are presented for review and informational purposes only under fair use, and no ownership of these is claimed or implied by this show. Email enquiries to peggymountpod@gmail.com
Aug 13 2021
37 mins
Thundercats/Going For GoldRoland Rat: The Series/Neighbours
Our journey through the shiniest decade continues to thrive, and the custodians of The Peggy Mount Calamity Hour find themselves in the mood for laughter, for song, and most pertinently for sunshine... This week it's 1986, and it's said that you're never more than three channels away from Roland Rat. We test this urban myth, find it to be undoubtedly true, then take the precaution of distancing ourselves on the other side of the planet to tut through the net curtains while the Neighbours enjoy a buck's party that we weren't invited to. Is the height of Summer really the time for expecting a Christmas Special compilation to be anything other than a mortifyingly lazy schedule filler? What evidence of career-ending impropriety did the BBC booking team have on the wealth of stars who agreed to show their faces next to Roland and shred all dignity in the process? And how many strippers and naked men and Stefan Dennis in a nappy is too many strippers and naked men and Stefan Dennis in a nappy when you're writing a daytime soap opera? We know, and in three quarters of an hour you will as well... The Peggy Mount Calamity Hour is a free podcast from iPorle Media, which holds production copyright. Opinions and recollections expressed are not to be taken as fact. The title and credit music is by Doctor Velvet. Audio segments from television programmes are presented for review and informational purposes only under fair use, and no ownership of these is claimed or implied by this show. Email enquiries to peggymountpod@gmail.com
Jul 30 2021
44 mins
No.73 / Cool It
In these sober times one can often get too hung up on heavyweight televisual analysis, and the episode has come for The Peggy Mount Calamity Hour to let its hair down. Right down, in fact. Oh yes, we are talking "shoulder length"... This week it's 1985 and it's all going on! All the very coolest aspects (and pop music stars) of the decade as you remember it finally kick in right here, as we eschew the slightly cosy Saturday morning offerings of Auntie Beeb and head down Maidstone way to drop into No 73, before hopping quietly back over the fence for some bitingly accessible social satire (do you remember cakes?) from flexuous-physiognomied funnyman Phil in Cool It! Have TVS finally perfected the 'chaotic' TV format by having an eclectic running schedule combined with not a single person in front of the camera knowing what anyone else is supposed to be doing? Is the prestige of their guest-list really worth the hole in the ozone layer above Maidstone because of all the hairspray which has to be used? And is there a statute of limitations covering the amount of time Blackout is allowed to still be unashamedly snobby about observational standup routines? The answer to at least one of those is a firm 'yes'... The Peggy Mount Calamity Hour is a free podcast from iPorle Media, which holds production copyright. Opinions and recollections expressed are not to be taken as fact. The title and credit music is by Doctor Velvet. Audio segments from television programmes are presented for review and informational purposes only under fair use, and no ownership of these is claimed or implied by this show. Email enquiries to peggymountpod@gmail.com
Jul 23 2021
44 mins
The Tripods/Dear Ladies
One of the primary aims of The Peggy Mount Calamity Hour is exploring the cultural dichotomy between celebrating the past, and doing so in a way which embraces present and ever-evolving technology. One of the other aims is getting drunk while doing so of course, which makes this the most potentially on-brand episode to date... This week it's 1984 (although some are calling it 2089), and we drop in on one village in England where benevolent evil has arrived with a stonking great middle-leg in The Tripods, before pootling over to Stackton Tressel where a greater level of quiet chaos reigns under the arch glare of Hinge and Bracket, who are most definitely our Dear Ladies. What happens in the future that all clothes have to come from a rural jumble sale taking place shortly after the first World War? At what point in the past was the formula cracked with even-more-old-fashioned comedy that would go on to entrance Messrs Velvet and Blackout in the future? And how come these programmes were hugely successful in the mid-1980s when there's not a sniff of neon? We went digging and this was what we unearthed... The Peggy Mount Calamity Hour is a free podcast from iPorle Media, which holds production copyright. Opinions and recollections expressed are not to be taken as fact. The title and credit music is by Doctor Velvet. Audio segments from television programmes are presented for review and informational purposes only under fair use, and no ownership of these is claimed or implied by this show. Email enquiries to peggymountpod@gmail.com
Jul 16 2021
36 mins
Captain Zep - Space Detective/ManimalScreen Test/Tomorrow's World
Jul 2 2021
38 mins
The Adventure Game/Ask The Family
As Sir Oliver Newton-John once crooned, "let's get cerebral, cerebral, I should like to get cerebral, oh let's get into cerebral". Yes, The Peggy Mount Calamity Hour continues to roll through what is generally agreed to be The Best Decade by donning its game-face... This week it's 1981, and our heroes test what few grey cells they have left by crossing the galaxy to Arg to stare blankly at instruction-free puzzles in The Adventure Game, before returning to the utter comfort of Robert Robinson's ferociously amiable quizmastery in Ask The Family. Did Adventure Game creator Patrick Dowling basically watch Sapphire And Steel then exclaim "this, but with stickers on the floor" to his production team? Will we ever return to the glory days when quiz contestants were chosen to appear on television based on their knowledge and skill, rather than any aesthetic considerations of them actually appearing on actual television? And are Messrs Velvet and Blackout really going to wait until recording the episode to workshop the Robinson impression? Click-on dear listener, answers await... The Peggy Mount Calamity Hour is a free podcast from iPorle Media, which holds production copyright. Opinions and recollections expressed are not to be taken as fact. The title and credit music is by Doctor Velvet. Audio segments from television programmes are presented for review and informational purposes only under fair use, and no ownership of these is claimed or implied by this show. Email enquiries to peggymountpod@gmail.com
Jun 25 2021
38 mins
The Red Hand Gang/The Cannon And Ball ShowNew series trailer: Nobody's House/The Kit Curran Radio Show/Bob's Full House
Jun 4 2021
21 mins
The 70s Stop Here/The New Year Show
HOOTS! Grab the hand-sanitiser, whatever's left of the scotch and remember to stick a lump of coal in your pocket for The Peggy Mount Hogmanay Hour! Messrs Velvet, Blackout and Bognops rouse from their festive sloth to see in the new year, or perhaps more pertinently see out the old. We drop in with Dame Penelope Keith assuring that us The 70s Stop Here!, an unequaled archival treat which values schedule-filling over entertainment value. But the razzamatazz is cranked back up as we jump forward six years, down two channels and up across the border for STV's The New Year Show, where a clinically-lit studio in Glasgow plays host to Dame Russ Abbot (yes, again), Dame Lena Zavaroni (yes, again) and a swathe of 'well-worn' light entertainment stereotypes under the auspices of Dame Jack McLaughlin. It is indeed a time for looking forward, not back.    Which of our heroes was dragged out and around the houses at midnight at the end of December as a six year old? Which of them finds himself trapped in a time-vortex as New Year's Eve replays its televisual self verbatim and the new year becomes the old year again? And who suffers an on-mic flashback to day zero of a pathological trifle aversion? Forget your old acquaintances, and find out... (NOTE: If you want to count down to midnight with us in the show, start the podcast at 23:12:10. That's twelve minutes and ten seconds past eleven o'clock at night. Lovely stuff.)   The Peggy Mount Calamity Hour is a free podcast from iPorle Media, which holds production copyright. Opinions and recollections expressed are not to be taken as fact. The title and credit music is by Doctor Velvet. Audio segments from television programmes are presented for review and informational purposes only under fair use, and no ownership of these is claimed or implied by this show. Email enquiries to peggymountpod@gmail.com
Dec 31 2020
49 mins