Bad Movies & Beer
Two friends on a beer-fueled hunt to find the best bad movies.
Season 2 Preview!
Sep 3 2021
Episode 61 - Phantom of the Paradise (1974)
Cooper and Nolan are selling their souls for rock n' roll this week when they meet the PHANTOM OF THE PARADISE! It's the Phantom of the Opera like you've never seen it before, and the guys have all kinds of questions: Who was in charge of casting? Are the similarities with The Rocky Horror Picture Show just a coincidence? And most importantly of all, how does a guy who writes a huge musical about a man selling his soul to the devil not realize when it's happening to him? This early Brian De Palma film is truly a one of a kind experience, so get ready to get your glam on; this episode (featuring a beer from the Grove Brewing Company) might just be your ticket to paradise!
Episode 60 - Under Siege (1992)
It's hilarity on the high seas this week, as Cooper and Nolan are covering a true early 90s sensation - UNDER SIEGE! Yes, it was undeniably a massive hit when it came out. But as the guys will tell you, with each passing year Steven Seagal's one-time movie star status becomes harder and harder to understand. Is he the world's worst (successful) action hero? Maybe, but that doesn't stop this from being a thoroughly entertaining movie - one that features C-level acting, ridiculous deaths, and the unforgettable sight of Gary Busey in drag. There's plenty more worth talking about so prepare to come aboard; this episode (featuring a beer from Stonehooker Brewing Company) is one you'll definitely want to set sail with.
May 12 2022
Episode 59 - The Beastmaster (1982)
Cooper and Nolan are going wild this week when they unleash the awesome power of THE BEASTMASTER! It's an epically ambitious piece of sword & sorcery that started off with a short theatrical run, found a second life as a cable TV staple, and eventually got the deluxe VSU treatment from the fine folks at Vinegar Syndrome. Quite a journey, but that's nothing compared to what the guys experience as they try to navigate this movie's many bizarre elements. Using animals to enhance your own sexual experiences? S&M guards in assless chaps? Hooking up with your own cousin? And as if those things weren't strange enough, imagine viewing them through the HAWK CAM! It's almost too fantastical to believe, but our 59th episode (featuring a beer from Little Beasts Brewing Co.) is stronger than a painted tiger.
May 5 2022
Episode 58 - Chopper Chicks in Zombietown (1989)
Cooper and Nolan are traveling to Tromaville for this week's episode, as they check out CHOPPER CHICKS IN ZOMBIETOWN by special request! This undeniably bizarre 80s disasterpiece features more leather, denim, and giant hair than you'll know what to do with. Is it horror? Comedy? Sci-fi? The guys aren't sure, but one thing they DO know is that thanks to the mad scientists behind this movie, they can now cross "Zombie b***job" off their "Things I never thought I'd see" bingo cards. That's just one of the many, MANY ridiculous things that happens in this one, so get ready to ride; this episode (featuring a beer from Counterpart Brewing) is definitely worth the trip!
Apr 27 2022
Episode 57 - Dude, Where’s My Car? (2000)
The guys are taking a trip down memory lane this week with the unforgettable 2000 comedy DUDE, WHERE'S MY CAR? Despite being firmly in the target audience for this movie, Nolan somehow never saw it as a teenager - putting his grumpy woke Dad vibes in direct conflict with Cooper's 90s nostalgia. Maybe that's why they spend most of this episode alternating between laughing like stoners and arguing like old men. Still, it's a fun 4/20 adventure that (much like a movie that features blind kids, strippers, ostriches, a space cult, and Andy Dick in a cage) goes off the rails at points but (maybe?) makes sense in the end. You'll have to hear it to believe it, but we should warn you: This mysterious and powerful episode features a beer from SweetWater Brewing Company, and it's mystery is only exceeded by its power!
Apr 21 2022
Episode 56 - Coffy (1973)
Cooper and Nolan are pouring themselves a hot cup of 70s action this week with the blaxploitation classic COFFY! Legendary actress Pam Grier is on a one-woman quest for justice, and the guys are on a two-man quest to try to make sense of the gritty world of pimps, pushers, & prostitutes. Apparently it's a world of individual theme songs, gratuitous use of dummies, and horrible attempts at accents, with just enough social commentary sprinkled in to make this somehow not feel totally ridiculous (although there ARE a lot of shirt rips). What IS ridiculous is Cooper's ongoing obsession with making Nolan seem like a perv, and let's just say that thanks to Pam Grier's ample... ahem... talents, there's lots of opportunities for that. So enjoy yourself, but be careful; the amount of fun in this episode (featuring a beer from Tomorrow Brew Co.) might just keep you up all night.
Apr 13 2022
Episode 55 - Heart Condition (1990)
Is recommending that your client join a movie where a racist cop gets haunted by the ghost of his Black arch enemy (after first receiving that arch enemy's heart via transplant) enough to get a Hollywood agent fired? You can hear the answer this week when Cooper and Nolan review what is quite possibly Denzel Washington's worst movie ever - HEART CONDITION. In all seriousness, there's so much that goes wrong with this alleged comedy that it would be impossible to put the blame on one person, but that won't stop the guys from taking their best shot. From the screenwriter (whose sense of humor is what REALLY needed a transplant), to the director, to whoever was in charge of picking out the music, it's one bad decision after another. There IS plenty to laugh about though, from Nolan's theory that both The Sixth Sense AND Point Break stole from this movie, to Cooper's thoughts on whether it's possible to perform sexually with the ghost of your lover's ex watching. Is it enough to give this movie a new lease on life? Absolutely not, but this episode (featuring not one but TWO beers from Bell's Brewery) is definitely one you'll want to hear before it's too late.
Apr 6 2022
Episode 54 - Showgirls (1995)
After three failed attempts, Cooper and Nolan are FINALLY taking a look at one of the most legendary bad movies of all time - SHOWGIRLS! It's Elizabeth Berkley like you've never seen her before - unsuccessfully trying to act angry. She's also flashing a LOT of skin as she awkwardly dances her way through what is either a brilliant satire of "Star is Born" movies or an genuine attempt that went horribly wrong. The guys might not know which it is, but they DO know one thing... the James character did NOT need to be in this movie. That's just one of the many things getting exposed in this one, so leave your inhibitions at the door; what happens in this episode (featuring a beer from New Ontario Brewing Co.), STAYS in this episode.
Mar 30 2022
Episode 53 - Theater of Blood (1973)
Cooper and Nolan are raising the curtain on some 70s horror this week with THEATER OF BLOOD! In this low-budget bit of British cinema, horror icon Vincent Price gets to live out every actor's dream by murdering his critics. But could that ever actually happen? Let's just say the guys might be reconsidering some of the things they've said in past episodes. That's because once you've seen the lengths a man will go to for revenge - amateur surgery, trampoline swordfights, death by train - anything seems possible. So get ready for the performance of a lifetime; this episode (featuring a beer from Overflow Brewing Company) might just leave you rolling in the aisles.
Mar 23 2022
Episode 52 - The Boondock Saints II: All Saints Day (2009)
The guys are getting their Irish on this week with THE BOONDOCK SAINTS II: ALL SAINTS DAY, the "Wait, when did they make that?" sequel to legendary cult favorite The Boondock Saints. For Cooper it's a paint-by-numbers action movie with characters who have NOT aged well, but for Nolan (who was told he was Irish for the first 36 years of his life) it's an emotional journey through the very fabric of his identity. There's also bad jokes, bad accents, and all kinds of bad decisions, which can only mean one thing - the MacManus boys are back! Get ready to bro out; this episode (featuring a truly inspired beer connection from Beyond The Pale Brewing Company) puts the "Saint" in St. Patrick's Day!
Mar 18 2022
Episode 51 - The Karate Kid Part II (1986)
Cooper and Nolan are back from their mid-season break, and thanks to a very special audience request they're waxing on (and off) about THE KARATE KID PART II - aka The Karate Kid, but in Japan this time. Much like the movie's producers, the guys are running back enjoyable bits from earlier installments, such as: - Who's the real hero of this movie? - Everyone loves Elizabeth Shue - Is that guy actually (insert cultural background here)? ...plus their usual assortment of d**k jokes and nonsense. So get ready to experience the Glory of Love; this episode (featuring a collaboration between Sawdust City Brewing Co. and Indie Alehouse) is sure to drum up some excitement!
Mar 9 2022
BONUS Episode - Let My Puppets Come (1976)
In this very special BONUS EPISODE, Cooper and Nolan try desperately to hang in there as they discuss LET MY PUPPETS COME, a movie that can best be summed up by the phrase "Puppets make a porno". This bizarre piece of 70s underground cinema (released on Blu Ray from the fine folks at Vinegar Syndrome) was Nolan's birthday present back in their October gift exchange, and it's a ridiculous, absurd, totally offensive piece of shock comedy that features just about every puppet sex act you could think of - and some that you probably couldn't. Seriously, words can't even describe some of the things that happen in this movie, so the guys have their work cut out for them, but at least thanks to Great Lakes Brewery Nolan didn't have to try too hard to find a beer for this episode. So if you're brave enough, get ready to get weird; Valentine's Day may be over but there's still plenty of love (or something) waiting for you in this one!
Feb 15 2022
Episode 50 - Top Gun (1986)
Cooper and Nolan are taking a ride into the danger zone this week with Tom Cruise's 80s classic TOP GUN! It's another controversial choice for this podcast - one that began as a desire to find a BIG movie for the 50th episode, and one that ends with Cooper offering to let the estate of director Tony Scott kick him in the balls. Along the way the guys argue over topics like whether there's more to the Maverick/Iceman relationship than meets the eye, if Kelly McGillis was the right choice for the role of Charlie, and the possibility that this whole thing is just propaganda to get people to join the Navy. Just like playing beach volleyball in jeans, things heat up quickly in this one, so prepare for takeoff; this episode (featuring a beer from Barnstormer Brewing & Distilling Co.) will definitely test the rules of engagement!
Dec 29 2021
Episode 49 - Silent Night, Deadly Night Part 2 (1987)
One year after tackling the original, a very drunk Cooper and Nolan are keeping their Christmas promise by covering SILENT NIGHT, DEADLY NIGHT PART 2! Since the first movie did a perfect job of setting up a sequel, the guys went in with high expectations. And thanks to the 12 Beers of Christmas from Whitewater Brewing Company, they also went in with extremely high blood alcohol levels. The results were a lot like the grown up version of main character Ricky - an angry, sloppy mess. After the longest beer talk in the history of this podcast, the guys weigh in on topics like movie theatre etiquette, acceptable explosion sizes, and how much recycled footage is too much. Not to mention their attempt to figure out what Nolan hates more - the Catholic Church or guys named Chip. It's a wild ride, so grab a beer (or 12) and strap yourself in; much like Christmas, an episode like this only comes once a year!
Dec 23 2021
Episode 48 - Double Impact (1991)
Cooper and Nolan are doubling down on action this week, with the unforgettable DOUBLE IMPACT! In addition to pushing the limits of early 90s green screen technology, this movie also pushed the limits of Jean-Claude Van Damme's acting ability by having him play not one but TWO characters... who both speak with a Belgian-French accent and know karate. Is there a limit to how far this movie can stretch its ridiculous premise? And speaking of stretches, does JCVD (either of them) find an excuse to work in his trademark splits? The answer won't surprise you! Get ready to feel the impact; this episode (featuring a beer from the Brock Street Brewing Company) brings new meaning to the phrase "twinning".
Dec 15 2021
Episode 47 - Rhinestone (1984)
Better polish your spurs, because this week Cooper and Nolan are putting the boots to RHINESTONE - the legendary country comedy flop starring Sylvester Stallone and Dolly Parton. It's a pairing that raises more questions than answers, and the guys have plenty of questions of their own. Is there such a thing as an Italian perv? Do all men automatically want to see strange genitalia? And is anyone in this movie NOT a stereotype? No matter the answer, this episode (featuring a beer from Big Rock Brewery) is guaranteed to be a rip roarin' good time. Just watch out for Drinkenstein!
Dec 8 2021
Episode 46 - Hell Comes to Frogtown (1988)
Cooper and Nolan were feeling froggy this week, so they decided to jump into legendary 80s B-movie HELL COMES TO FROGTOWN! With a plot straight out of a porno movie and professional wrestling legend Rowdy Roddy Piper battling giant mutant frogs in the lead role, this might be the least controversial movie choice in the history of this podcast. But even though it sounds (and looks, and feels) ridiculous, could there be a powerful message lurking beneath the surface? Maybe! Or maybe the guys just got drunkenly caught up in all the bizarre action, comedy, and... let's say romance... that this one has to offer. Either way, you'd better buckle your chastity belt, because this episode (featuring a beer from Sonnen Hill Brewing), is one hell of a good time.
Dec 1 2021
Episode 45 - Event Horizon (1997)
This week Cooper and Nolan open the gateway to infinite space (and infinite terror) with EVENT HORIZON! Originally pitched as the Shining but in space, This movie went on to become a beloved cult favorite despite absolutely bombing at the box office. Did it deserve better? That's what the guys try to figure out as they make their way through gore, jump scares, and an all-time creepy performance by Sam Neill (or is it Bill Paxton?). They've also got a perfect beer connection from Halo Brewery, so don't be scared - where this episode is going, you won't need ears to hear.
Nov 24 2021
Episode 44 - Game of Death (1978)
It's a fight to the finish this week, as Cooper and Nolan attempt to survive the GAME OF DEATH! What do you get when you take 11 minutes of Bruce Lee footage and try to stretch it into a full-length movie? A whole lot of smoke, mirrors, and laughable editing, not to mention the definitive example of Brucesploitation. At least the guys have a great beer connection from Rouge River Brewing Company, but will that (along with an unforgettable fight scene involving Kareem Abdul-Jabbar) be enough to make up for the many MANY unforgivable parts of this movie? There's only one way to find out... break out your best yellow track suit and take a listen!
Nov 17 2021
Episode 43 - Sweet November (2001)
Things are getting emotional this week by special request, as Cooper and Nolan spend some time with SWEET NOVEMBER. Hated by critics, loved by fans (at least according to Rotten Tomatoes), this movie is basically a metaphor for Keanu Reeves' entire career. But will his unique charisma and... let's say "interesting" choices be enough to win the guys over? The answer may surprise you, especially after sitting through a truly insane ad pitch, Keanu Reeves singing (!), and a tearjerker ending you can see coming a mile away. Better get the tissues ready; this episode (featuring a beer from 5 Paddles Brewing Company) is one that you won't want to say goodbye to.
Nov 10 2021