Oct 6 2022
Can You Really Run A Business With Your Other Half?
Hey everyone. Welcome to this week's podcast. I'm your host, Sarah Jolley Jarvis, and I am really excited to be sharing with you my take on working with your other half. So in this week's podcast, what we're gonna be talking around is either bringing your other half as in your other. Who you are in a romantic relationship with into your business or, You know, in my case, my own experience is around setting up businesses with my husband. To start off with my relationship , cause it's the one I'm most qualified around. We've started a number of bit different businesses. We've started them in different forms. Sometimes he's taken the lead. Sometimes I've been there as kind of supporting roles. Sometimes it's been the other way around. It's been my, on me taking the. And him in a more supporting role. You know, we have very complimentary skills and that's why I think it works for us is because there are very clear boundaries there. And that's not to say that sometimes these boundaries get muddled or a little bit more, well, less clear or, you know, that we don't have areas of the business where neither of us actually really enjoy doing it, or both of us really enjoy doing it. Which then is obviously a discussion point. You know, with any relationship, with any work, working relationship, it's not going to be. All the time, and I can definitely confirm that. And what I can say is setting out really clear boundaries, expectations, providing clarity on, on whose, whose role does this fall into being in a position where you can keep the communication open so that you can. Pull each other up when you're not necessarily doing something which is the most sensible, or you're coming from a place of, of more of an emotional response than a constructive response, et cetera, et cetera, is really helpful. And, and then that's the thing is, is you know, being able to work so closely with your other half, that's that person you know better than anybody else is so beneficial, is so helpful. And is it, you know, is really fulfilling in. But when people, when I tell to people that I, I work with my husband, we run businesses together, we work in the same office. They're like my word. I could not do that with my other half. And, and I get that. I, I understand how, and if I hadn't worked with Martin, if I hadn't gotten an understanding of what he's like to work with I think I would've felt like that too. And I think in some cases it is much healthier. It's much better. To have that separate life. And there have been times when we've been like, Actually, would it be better if we had very separate businesses? And we run them very separately. But we've always come to the conclusion that, you know, playing with our, playing to our strengths and you know, having each other involved in each of other's businesses makes the most sense. You know, he's very into the digital marketing side of stuff. Lead generation, you know, bring me the leads, guys, and if they're the right type of, Then I'll convert them. And so, you know, it, it's having that awareness of where their strengths are, where yours are, and I think we are very lucky that we have those dissing roles. When you don't have them, it's divvying them up and being very clear on, on who's gonna. Who's gonna take what and, and who's going to step back and let the other one take the lead? And I think that would be more tricky. So, you know, we are lucky in that format. What I have had with clients is that they've set up a business then for whatever reason, their other half has decided to come on board. They tend to be coming in, in a kind of role below that person. Which can lead to friction, it can be quite difficult. Also, there is that level of frustration. If you've set up the business and you've been everything to that business, then this person comes in and starts doing an element of that role, very difficult for them to take ownership of it. It's very difficult for you to let go. There's the potential, you know, if you were to take on an employee, the likelihood is is that person isn't going to do it to the same standard as. Not without training and providing clarity, but giving feedback can be harder when you is your other half, when it is somebody close to you. You know, they always say, don't take on friends and, and work with friends and employee friends. I don't think there's even a saying about other halves. I think it's just, it's just taken as read that that wouldn't be a great idea. But it can be, and I have seen it work, but where it works is because people have boundaries, people have expectations, and, and they're able to communicate openly. Sometimes that does lead to heated discussions. You know, I have seen it. We, I've experienced it myself, and, and it's a case of them calling off and coming to it in a constructive way. You are going to lose your what? Its, There you go. I didn't swear. Which means I don't have to tick that box on my podcast. You're going to lose control of your emotions sometimes. At people who you are more comfortable with, cuz you're able to do that, you know that you're safe to do that. And so, you know, keep that one in mind. If you are finding that, you know, you, you're building up frustrations, it, it makes sense to, when you are calmer to have that conversation with that person, you're still feeling that, they're probably still feeling that, you're saying feeling that, but then you're not saying anything. They still exist. Those feelings. You might as well get them out into the. Even if you're saying, Hey, I feel like this. I know I'm being a bit of a bottom about it, but I wanted to share it with you because you're probably feeling that I'm behaving this way too, and I wanted to explain why. So, you know, it always makes a lot of sense to, to keep the communication as open as you can, and I think that goes for friends. If you've got a really decent friend who's really highly skilled at something, but everyone's like, Oh, it's a bad idea to take on friends, then it's setting those boundaries, getting clear, hey, you know, When's it gonna be too much? What would be too much? Where are we gonna have sort of like a, a sort of requirement of timeout or for somebody to, to put on a different hat and, and, and, you know, appreciate that this is a working relationship as well as a friendship. There are so many relationships spoiled over it. I totally understand why people don't go near it with their other hearts or with friends. But this is, you know, if you are seeing that as an opportunity and you are, you're constantly, the thoughts constantly coming back round to this person would be great. I'd love to do. Give it a go, guys. You know, everyone loves to tell you how terrible things are and what a bad idea things are. I mean, gosh, any of you who've had a baby, you know, everyone as soon as you're pregnant wants to tell you about how your life's totally over. But when you weren't pregnant, they were asking you when you were gonna have a baby and confirm that it's a great idea to have a baby. So you, you can't win. And it's the same thing with with business and taking on people, and taking on people, people and saying, Oh, you know, you probably should, should steer clear of doing that. It's your life, it's your business. And if you wanna give it a whirl, then give it a whirl. It's your story. You don't, you know, it's your story, right? They have not got a crystal ball. They don't know what's going to happen. But if you come into it with an understanding of what could happen, And you've made plans, you've put parameters in place to protect each of you, if that does happen. And to communication open as much as you can to avoid the bad things happening, that is a good start. That is a way of helping you to make the most of the resources that you are surrounded by whilst not, you know, avoiding as much as you can. That risk of a relationship going, Sarah. So I hope that's helped guys. I hope that gives you an. I am going to say, yeah, you know, it, it's, it's worked for us. It's continuing to work for us, but you know, it hasn't been without its highs and lows. One of the main things I would say around working with your other half is that they get it. So when you're working later, when you've got deadlines to meet, when you're recording a podcast on a Monday evening, because that's the night you like doing it they can understand that. Whereas resentment can build when somebody is outside of your business looking. And what they're seeing is it taking more and more of your time and they're not necessarily seeing the fruits of your labor the way you'd hope. So if your revenue isn't as good, if it's not as as high, if it's not as consistent as you are hoping people get it more when they're more involved. And if you've got a partner and they're not that involved and they're quite suspicious and quite scared of self-employment and they haven't done it themselves, they haven't made that leap, and then you know, bringing them on your journey, sharing with them, reassuring. Can go a long, long way to helping them to feel better, to feel more confident, and to feel more involved. And, and that's the thing is, is at the end of the day, we, we want to feel involved. We want to be sharing these experience with our other halves as so, you know, let them in and share with them where you are at and what you're trying to achieve. So that's it for me guys. I hope that has helped. I hope that has maybe inspired you. There are so many couples in business out there that, you know, it's well worth looking in and, and, and seeing some of the, the couples that are out there, we've got couples who are considerably older than nerds who've been in business. They are our inspiration and, and our source of, you know what, this is doable, it's achievable and it's well worth having to go. So that's it for me this week, guys. I hope you've enjoyed it. Next week I'm gonna be talking to you around balance and balancing your priorities and getting clear on what you want, what your version of wealth is, and then generating that. So that's it for me guys this week. Have a great rest of your week.Say hi and leave a message or question on the Women’s Wealth Podpage Want Help Creating Your Version of Wealth Or Simply Find Out MoreBuy my book here | Non-UK book here Socials:Connect with me on LinkedIn | Join the Women's Wealth Community hereIf you enjoy the Women's Wealth Podcast (formally Selling Without Sleaze) please rate and review us on Apple or Spotify Want to chat? Drop me an email: Sarah@womenswealthformula.com
