Secret Self-Sabotage with Jessica Cuatrecasas

Jessica Cuatrecasas

Secret Self-Sabotage Podcast is for women who look on the outside as though they have it all, but feel like something is missing and are full of self-loathing, shame and guilt. You wish your life could be happier and more fulfilling and that you could get it together. You're holding on to a secret of feeling unworthy and unhappy. You are ready to let go of the dark, low vibe energy that's keeping your stuck. This podcast gives you the confidence, courage and self-compassion to take back control from a loving, heart-centred place, release your negativity and build the foundations of a life you love. This show is nurturing, needed and necessary to address how you feel right now, before it contaminates your relationships and the rest of your life. Hosted by Jessica Cuatrecasas, a life coach who is over 10 years clean and sober, she'll share that a life of happiness, fulfilment and love is out there for you, and it's not that far away. This is one to listen to if you're ready to re-spark your life and let go of your secret self-sabotage. read less

020 3 Ways to Re-Set, Re-Align and Re-Emerge Stronger After Confrontation
Oct 3 2022
020 3 Ways to Re-Set, Re-Align and Re-Emerge Stronger After Confrontation
The internet is full of guides on how to reset and live a more meaningful life. However, none of them talk about resetting and re-emerging stronger after a confrontation. Confrontations, especially with toxic people, can become so overwhelming that you just want a fresh start. But moving on doesn't just happen overnight. The true power of resetting your life lies in understanding you cannot do it alone.  In today's episode, I'll go through three practical ways to reset, re-align and re-emerge stronger after a confrontation. I'll also share the benefits of embracing our innate feminine energy in this masculine world that we live in. What You'll Learn: - How to reset your life after a confrontation - Why you need to trust your feminine intuition  - How the fear of upsetting people is holding you back - Communicating your needs isn't selfish - Strategies for remaining calm when you feel triggered  - Why you need to stop running away from problems - How to stand up for yourself in any situation  - Reasons why people tolerate bad behaviour Resetting your life is all about finding the strength to defend your boundaries and not letting other people intimidate you. The next time anybody crosses the line, push back. You are much stronger than you think, so tap into your inner strength and stick up for yourself. Resources: - Get my FREE 7 Subtle Signs of Self-Sabotage https://bit.ly/sevensubtlesigns - Reach out to me on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/jessicacuatrecasas/
017 How to Say No to a Narcissist and Know Your Inner Voice
Sep 12 2022
017 How to Say No to a Narcissist and Know Your Inner Voice
Dealing with a narcissist is hard, but saying no to them is even harder. Their self-importance and entitlement will make your life frustrating and emotionally challenging. What makes narcissists toxic is that they believe they're 100% awesome - and you're not. This is why learning more about narcissistic traits and the ways to deal with them can help you honour your boundaries. In this episode, we'll go through what it's like to deal with a narcissist, how their behaviour might affect your self-esteem, and what you can do to put yourself first and care for your own emotional wellbeing. What You'll Learn: - How to say no to a narcissist - Signs someone is gaslighting you and what to do about it - The benefits of avoiding confrontation whenever possible - Why you ought to put your needs first and listen to your inner voice - Understand that people-pleasing is bad for your self-esteem - How to release unworthy thoughts - It's not your job to try to change a narcissist - Why you need to set clear boundaries with a narcissist Navigating a relationship with a narcissist can take a toll on your mental and emotional wellbeing. It gets even worse if your life revolves around them. That said, here's what you need to remember - it's not your job to control that person's behaviour, and it's okay to enforce boundaries and put your needs first.  Resources: - Get my FREE 7 Subtle Signs of Self-Sabotage https://bit.ly/sevensubtlesigns - Reach out to me on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/jessicacuatrecasas/
016 How to Stop Being Your Own Worst Enemy
Sep 5 2022
016 How to Stop Being Your Own Worst Enemy
Are you your own worst enemy? Do you constantly sabotage the opportunities and joys that life presents to you? Maybe you feel like deep down you don't deserve success, joy or love. I know that feeling, and it can be frustrating to feel as though you're working against yourself. So what do you do when you find yourself seemingly working against your own best interests? Tune in to learn the practical steps you can implement today to overcome the roots of self-sabotaging behaviours and stop being your own worst enemy.  What You'll Learn: - How to stop being your own worst enemy - Understand that you are responsible for your own happiness  - Actions that make you your own worst enemy - How to uncover self-sabotaging behaviour - The benefits of getting over your regrets from the past - The five stages of grief - What it takes to move on  - Get to know your inner critic - Look to your past as an opportunity for growth We constantly hear that happiness is a choice. But the question is, how can we be happy when we don't feel happy with our current situation? Your circumstances might be different, but if you're spending time focused on your flaws or letting others determine how you should live your life, you are your own worst enemy. And things need to change.  Resources: - Book: “The Way of Integrity: Finding the Path to Your True Self” by Martha Beck https://amzn.to/3KGeIbj  - Get my FREE 7 Subtle Signs of Self-Sabotage https://bit.ly/sevensubtlesigns - Reach out to me on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/jessicacuatrecasas/
015 What is Toxic Positivity and How to Change It
Aug 29 2022
015 What is Toxic Positivity and How to Change It
Having a positive approach to life is good for your mental health, and that's a fact. We all want to live in this perfect utopia full of joy, happiness, and satisfaction. But the reality is that life will sometimes be full of painful emotions and experiences. These emotions will be unpleasant, but they are important and need to be embraced with openness and honesty.  In today's episode, we'll take a deep dive into the world of toxic positivity, how to avoid it, and the consequences of trying to suppress emotions that aren't happy or positive. What You'll Learn: - What is toxic positivity? - Understanding the things that make positivity toxic - Valuing happiness versus prioritising positivity - Why it's okay to be negative sometimes - How toxic positivity encourages self-sabotaging behaviour - The drawbacks of repressing your feelings - Choose to talk to people who validate your feelings - Understand that you can't force happiness - Why we need to normalise not being okay Toxic positivity is the "good vibes only" approach to life that encourages people to ignore difficult emotions. While positive thinking has its benefits, it's almost impossible to think positively all the time. You need a balance between positivity and negativity in your life. So when you find yourself feeling particularly down, don't force happiness. Sit through your darkest emotions, validate them, and move on when you feel ready.  Resources:  - Get my FREE 7 Subtle Signs of Self-Sabotage https://bit.ly/sevensubtlesigns - Reach out to me on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/jessicacuatrecasas/
014 Why People Do the Things They Do
Aug 22 2022
014 Why People Do the Things They Do
Six fundamental needs drive human behaviour. Although we all share those same six needs, each of us values them differently, and we have varied processes when trying to satisfy those needs. If you'd like to have the best possible summer and make the best possible memories, you need to understand people's needs and the reasoning behind why people do the things they do.  Listen in to learn the motives that drive people's actions and tips on how to better understand your needs by creating new action patterns. What You'll Learn: - The 6 fundamental human needs - The link between needs and people's actions - Understanding the reasoning behind people's actions  - The underlying patterns for all emotions, behaviour, and actions - Why you need to know your needs and the beliefs around those needs  - How to find empowering ways to satisfy your needs - The biggest addiction when it comes to satisfying needs  - Polarity in romantic relationships and understanding each other's needs - The difference between love and connection What are your needs? Unfortunately, many people struggle to answer this question. They don't know what drives them to act, think, or feel. They also don't know how to articulate their real needs to other people. Yet knowing your needs and learning to communicate them is essential for finding satisfaction, meaning and joy in life. So if your summer isn't going according to plan, maybe it's time you thought about your needs and how they affect the people around you.  Resources: - Get my FREE 7 Subtle Signs of Self-Sabotage https://bit.ly/sevensubtlesigns - Reach out to me on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/jessicacuatrecasas/
013 How to Detach with Love from the Pain of Others
Aug 15 2022
013 How to Detach with Love from the Pain of Others
If you're constantly worried about a loved one, or feel like your life revolves around them doing well, you've got an attachment problem. The only healthy way to let go of this attachment is to detach with love. This involves caring enough about others to allow them space to learn from their mistakes. In today's episode, we'll go through effective strategies on how to overcome codependency, and detach with love from the pain of others. What You'll Learn: - How and why to detach with love - Why detaching is good for you and your loved one - The benefits of setting appropriate boundaries - Recognising that your feelings and needs are valid - How to express your own opinions and feelings - Why you need to take time out from an unproductive or hurtful relationship - The peace that comes with not making excuses for someone else's behaviour - The root cause of codependency It might be painful to witness a loved one go down the path of self-destruction. Interestingly, becoming overly attached is often not because we love them so much, but because we need them a little too much. The antidote to all of this is to detach and let go. Letting go of codependency allows us to enjoy life despite the other person's mishaps and behaviour.  Links and Resources: - Codependent No More: How to Stop Controlling Others and Start Caring for Yourself Paperback by Melody Beattie - https://www.amazon.com/Codependent-No-More-Controlling-Yourself/dp/1954118155/ - Get my FREE 7 Subtle Signs of Self-Sabotage https://bit.ly/sevensubtlesigns - Reach out to me on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/jessicacuatrecasas/
012 How to Turn Your Day Around
Aug 8 2022
012 How to Turn Your Day Around
Life can be funny. Some days are great, a few days are okay, and then we have some days where everything is just wrong. So how can you change a bad day, when you've started off on the wrong foot? How do you stop the unease from ruining your entire day? When a bad day happens, you only have two choices: you can either stay miserable or do something to turn the day around. Listen in to discover some easy-to-implement strategies you can use to turn around a bad day, no matter the reason behind it.  What You'll Learn: - How to turn around a bad day - Why you need to stop feeding negative thoughts with more negative thoughts - Accept that there will always be something that can trigger you - Living in the future and the dangers of overplanning  - Steps to releasing your attachment to an outcome - Fake it till you make it: good or bad advice? - The drawbacks of caring what other people think of you - How creating a gratitude list can help turn around a bad day Anything can trigger a bad day, especially in the summer when everybody is carefree. While we might not have control over what caused the bad day in the first place, we can turn around a bad day just as quickly as it started. Here's the thing: what seems like a bad day is often only a bad moment. The good thing about moments is that they come as fast as they go.   Resources: - Get my FREE 7 Subtle Signs of Self-Sabotage https://bit.ly/sevensubtlesigns - Reach out to me on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/jessicacuatrecasas/
011 How to Find Family Harmony this Summer
Aug 1 2022
011 How to Find Family Harmony this Summer
Summer! The season for pulling energies back into the family and outdoor activities. But there is a problem; most of us want to compensate for the last few summers we missed due to the pandemic. Everybody feels this massive pressure and desire to make this summer one to remember. So what can you do to balance boundaries and the need to get things done, but still have a great time? Tune in to this episode to learn strategic tips that may help encourage family harmony, enjoy the much-needed break and stay grounded when things don't go according to plan this summer.  What You'll Learn: - How to find family harmony and create balance between happiness and boundaries this summer - How to see things from the eye of a child - Why you need to be less reactive and more proactive this summer - The benefits of having a positive self-image - Why visualisation and positive self-talk work - Simple gratitude affirmations for your daily dose of thankfulness - How to answer the "what do you want to be" question At its core, family harmony means the ability to trust, support, and communicate with each other as a unit. This summer, I want you to build family harmony, maintain discipline, and still spend quality time as a family. With everybody trying to overcompensate for the missed summers, kids and responsibilities can turn parents into frustrated and impatient people. But with a bit of harmony and grounding work, this year's summer break does not have to be filled with anxiety.  Resources: - The Power of Now: A Guide to Spiritual Enlightenment by Eckhart Tolle ​​https://www.amazon.com/Power-Now-Guide-Spiritual-Enlightenment-ebook/dp/B002361MLA  - Get my FREE 7 Subtle Signs of Self-Sabotage https://bit.ly/sevensubtlesigns - Reach out to me on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/jessicacuatrecasas/
009 Selfishness or Self-Care
Jul 4 2022
009 Selfishness or Self-Care
The word self-care is everywhere at the moment. Everyone's using it from marketers, influencers, coaches and just everyone. Although it's understandably and rightfully used when talking about mental health, a lot of people are using it for the wrong reasons.  If you're all about being intentional about self-care but are unsure where to draw the line with selfishness, this episode is for you.  What You'll Learn: - The difference between self-care and selfishness - Why you should always take care of your needs first - How to overcome the "I'll be happy when…" mentality - The three primary levels of a relationship - Understanding what is self-love and what it's not - How to live life in your true authentic self - Why you need to stop hiding behind social media and pretending everything's okay - The easiest way to truly love yourself - Why you need to cut off the people that are draining your energy Self-care is all about taking care of your mental, emotional and physical well-being. However, this doesn't mean you neglect the needs of others, it just means that your needs are your priority. Being selfish, on the other hand, means draining someone else's energy to improve your own. So always protect, love, and replenish yourself, but not at the cost of someone else's self-care efforts. Resources:  - Get my FREE 7 Subtle Signs of Self-Sabotage https://bit.ly/sevensubtlesigns - Reach out to me on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/jessicacuatrecasas/
007 How to Know if Your Heart is not Healed
Jun 27 2022
007 How to Know if Your Heart is not Healed
Healing an emotional wound, just like healing a broken bone, will take time, self-compassion and lots of patience. If the emotional experience left you depressed or anxious, it can be hard to recognise when your heart is actually getting better. If you're having trouble recognising whether or not your heart is healed, this episode is for you. I’ll go through three tips to help you identify if you're getting better, and what you can do to overcome the psychological hurt that's bothering you. What You'll Learn: - How to know if your heart is 100% fixed - What it's like growing up in a home devoid of unconditional love - How childhood traumas manifest in adult life - The first step to loving yourself unconditionally  - What part self-compassion plays in a person's healing journey - How to take care of your inner child - Understand that the universe is constantly working in your favor - How to develop new habits and create new neural pathways in your brain Emotional healing is a process that demands diverse skills, and what worked for you may not work for the next person. Nonetheless, always remember to treat yourself with kindness and compassion. Your feelings are genuine and worthy, and the best way to acknowledge them is to go down the path of self-acceptance and do things that make you happy and complete. Resources  - “A Return to Love: Reflections on the Principles of “A Course in Miracles”” by Marianne Williamson  https://www.amazon.com/Return-Love-Reflections-Principles-Miracles/dp/0060927488  - Get my FREE 7 Subtle Signs of Self-Sabotage https://bit.ly/sevensubtlesigns  - Reach out to me on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/jessicacuatrecasas/
006 Finding Your Femininity
Jun 24 2022
006 Finding Your Femininity
Deep inside every woman lives a Queen. A Queen that is confident, strong, resilient, caring, and has power over her feminine energy. Unfortunately, society has overthrown this Queen and taken over the endless possibilities that are rightfully hers. If you’re tired of constantly dismissing yourself and your desires, I’m here to tell you that the era of the masculine woman is over. It’s now time for you to be a Queen and lead with the strong femininity your life badly craves.  What You’ll Learn: - How to create the life you desire by reclaiming your feminine power  - Understand that you deserve a life of purpose and pleasure - The path to developing unshakeable confidence in your abilities - Effects of being out of alignment with your feminine energy - Why you need to have the audacity to be a Queen - Take back your throne from negative self-talk - How to find the balance between your masculine and feminine energies We live in a world that pushes women to be more masculine: work hard toward their goals, get things done, push forward, follow a career, etc. This means that most of us have been suppressing our feminine traits just to be successful in life. But things have got to change. It’s time we found and embraced our feminine energy. And that starts when you look inward and explore the things that give you energy and push you to live life to the fullest. Links and Resources: - The Audacity to Be Queen by Gina DeVee https://www.amazon.com/Audacity-Be-Queen-Unapologetic-Manifesting/dp/0316458791 - Get my FREE 7 Subtle Signs of Self-Sabotage https://bit.ly/sevensubtlesigns  - Reach out to me on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/jessicacuatrecasas/
005 How to Trust in the Universe
Jun 23 2022
005 How to Trust in the Universe
Today I'm going to touch on something which has been key to my transformation and my journey into peace and serenity. I know this might trigger some people, but I believe trusting in the Universe can help set you free. Unfortunately, society today places more value on staying in control and living an organized, structured and planned life. This is where we go wrong, because the Universe has the power to dictate how we exist in this life.  What You'll Learn: - The first step to connecting with your spirituality - The difference between religion and spirituality - Understand that sometimes not getting what you want is a gift - Overcome the overwhelming win/lose mentality - How to trust that the universe is working for your greater good - The benefits of having a strict morning routine - How to connect with your inner soul - The power of journaling and having a gratitude list Think of all those moments when you felt like you needed to surrender and trust that things would work out. Think about all those times you felt overwhelmed by fear, worry, or stress that you felt there was no end to all the misery. No matter how it looks from the outside, nobody is ever truly in control of their lives. And once you accept this fact, you'll step into a state of surrender, which is one of the most pleasurable and freeing ways to live. Resources:  - Get my FREE 7 Subtle Signs of Self-Sabotage https://bit.ly/sevensubtlesigns  - Reach out to me on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/jessicacuatrecasas/