[0026]Accepting love

Podcards

Mar 9 2022 • 2 mins


We make a lot out of giving love and loving others unconditionally. Any healthy society teaches its young to love and care for others by making contact, by nurturing an understanding for people who look and sound different from themselves, so that they curb the natural impulses of hostility and egotism. To love then means to be completely open and vulnerable when you reach out to others, which in turn means that you have absolute trust in yourself as you let down your defences in favor of compassion and empathy. When you love somebody deeply and completely, happiness happens in giving them your love and devotion. The more deeply you are able to love someone, the more must you suffer grief at their loss.

But what of your capacity to accept love? People who feel loved are the one who are necessarily able to love, who necessarily feel safe and secure to love, who necessarily feel respected and have self-respect. The psychologist Abraham Maslow says that such people are exceptionally fortunate because they (usually) have lived their lives in the best conditions, having had good reference experiences and plenty of choices along the way. Such people seem to lead happier and more fulfilled lives because they see through the complex intermediate layers of value, which entice and ensnare ordinary people, to the simple truths and needs that activate an eagerness to live: to express themselves without fear; to act with integrity; to love and be loved; to feel like they have a stake in their world and therefore have a vested interest in its care and maintenance. So the path to love then appears to be a heightened development of your awareness, reason, and capacity to love, to such an extent that you transcend your own egocentric self-involvement, leaving yourself absolutely open and vulnerable to the possibility of its devastation and loss.

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